A Monster and a Pawn
by justbecauseofthis
Summary: Everyone is suspicious of Eren and decide to keep a close eye on him. Levi thinks of himself as a pawn for Commander Irvin to use. Together, Eren and Levi face their fears. **SPOILERS to CH. 49! My version of what takes place after CH 49. Rated M for language/adult theme/violence. MAIN: Eren/Levi. Irvin/Levi. Eventual: General/Levi. Implied: Eren/Mikasa.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: I spell Eren Yeager as Eren Jaeger and Erwin Smith as Irvin Smith. Fanfiction . net and I don't agree. Not that either way is wrong. It's just that when I read the manga that's the way it was spelled.  
**

**This story starts out slow, bear with me.  
**

* * *

Hours before the breach of Wall Rose

_"Mikasa," Corporal Rivaille had said directing his steely gaze at her. "Use your every ability to protect Eren." Mikasa nodded once._

_"Yes sir! I will." But the corporal wasn't finished. He had continued to gaze at her with unwavering stern eyes. They rooted straight into Mikasa's heart and immobilized her._

_"I don't know why you're so attached to Eren but remember to control yourself. Don't make another blunder." Her face had burned in humiliation; after all it was her fault that the corporal was temporarily crippled. She'd been too eager, too absorbed in the heat of revenge to keep her head straight. It won't happen again though. She'd ensure it. _

_"Yes sir, there won't be any." _

* * *

Eren and Mikasa sit alone in the wagon now, waiting for the others to return. Levi, along with the priest and Hanji, had left to observe the people of the outer wall. Hopefully, Levi will be able to convince the priest to reveal all his knowledge of the titans and why they are on the inside of wall Sina. They are silent with their own thoughts until Eren breaks it. He isn't one to keep quiet for long.

"Hey Mikasa, what did Captain Levi mean when he told you not to make another blunder?" Eren asks offhandedly. It isn't really a question that he cares to hear the answer to, just a part of him is a little curious since Mikasa isn't one to make mistakes. Color rushes to her pretty face and she tugs her scarf higher around her chin. Eren watches her curiously. She's embarrassed?

"It's nothing," she mumbles. Now Eren is interested. Mikasa's reaction had been too fascinating to just let the subject drop.

"What happened?" Eren pushes, leaning forward in his seat. She squirms away from him, tugging her scarf nervously again and looks out the wagon window.

"Come on! Don't tell me you embarrassed yourself in front of the Captain!" Eren laughs out loud and Mikasa glares at him.

"Shut up. Annie _ate_ you, that's twice as embarrassing." That shut him up. His mouth clamps close and his chin falls into the palm of his hand.

"You went too far," he mutters with a pout. Instantly Mikasa regrets her words. She sighs and reluctantly explains what Levi had meant earlier—that it was him who had rescued Eren.

"So you're telling me that it wasn't _you_ who saved me from Annie?" Eren repeats in astonishment. This whole time he'd believed Mikasa had saved his life, racking her number up to two times that he owed her, he'd actually felt a little guilty about it too since it seemed like she was constantly making up for his mistakes. She nods.

"Captain Levi saved both you and me." Eren becomes uncharacteristically quiet and it's Mikasa's turn to look at him questioningly. She misinterprets his silence as disappointment in her.

"I'm sorry Eren, I swear to you, next time I won't screw up." Eren scoffs.

"Tch, I don't care about that. And there definitely won't be a next time!" He pauses and lets out a frustrated sigh. "Why would the captain risk his life for me? It makes no sense!" Mikasa's dark eyes bore into him without blinking.

"All of us are risking our lives to protect you. You're humanity's last hope." Eren's jaw tightens. That was a lot of pressure to put on one person. How far would he be pushed until he fell apart?

* * *

Hours after the breach of Wall Rose

It bothers Corporal Levi that he's stuck here with the good for nothing military police at the inner wall while the rest of the survey corps are fighting somewhere, risking their lives to keep these greedy lowlifes safe. If it weren't for his goddamned ankle, he'd be out fighting too. The commander had ordered him to stay because even with his injury, Levi had insisted that he fight alongside them. It isn't like he's utterly useless. Just because he can't use his right leg to support his weight, doesn't mean he can't use his gear or swords. He can kill titans even with a busted ankle. The voices of the soldiers nearby drift within earshot.

The MPs are growing antsy. They're tired of waiting at wall Sina for orders from the survey corps' commander Irvin. Not much information has been passed to them and so they feel left in the dark. They don't know what they're waiting for, who they're protecting, or why they're here. They're MP for damn's sake, not suicidal Scouts!

"We're all just pawns for that goddamned commander to toy with! He doesn't care if we die." Levi doesn't know the soldier who has spoken and he doesn't care to know him either but he does have something to say so he spins on his heel and looks the man dead in the eye.

"Yes, you're all pawns," he dully agrees. His eyes shift and focus on every face that surrounds him. "That's what being a soldier means. You have no power over your own actions and you follow the orders given to you. If you've got a damn problem with that, then leave."

Not another word leaves that useless MP's mouth. Levi scoffs through his teeth and turns away. What trash, he thinks bitterly. Only an idiot wouldn't realize that they're all merely puppets, including himself. Levi is nothing more to Commander Irvin than a pawn but as a pawn, he'll play his role seamlessly, that's how Levi secedes from the other soldiers, even those of the survey corps. He is the greatest puppet of them all.

* * *

This scene is all too familiar—soldiers returning from another mission, numbers halved and injuries scored. This time however, the famous Lance Corporal Rivaille is among the spectating crowd. Like always there are bitter remarks of how the soldiers waste tax payer money by always losing and there are little brats that stretch up on their tiptoes to ogle in awe. All of it goes unheeded by Levi; his eyes scan the surviving soldiers.

They're all beaten up and grimy. Each one of them could use a good soaking. Upcoming are the new recruits from squad 104. Their heads hang and their eyes are glazed over, lost in the hell they've just faced. Levi looks for Mikasa and Eren but they're not there. He squeezes through the crowd and breaks through the line. A strong hand seizes his elbow and jerks him backward.

"Hey! You can't just cut in front of me!" a man snarls. Levi easily brushes the hand away and ignores him. The little twerps are getting closer. Levi steps toward them and the man clutches onto his arm again. This time Levi doesn't ignore him. His leg swings up and around in a roundhouse kick and the man flies to the ground, head cracking hard against the cement. A wince flashes across Levi's face—that move definitely didn't help the state of his ankle.

"Bastard!" another man growls. He's about to make the biggest mistake of attacking humanity's greatest fighter but someone calls out from behind him.

"Corporal! Corporal Levi!" Levi turns to see a small blonde kid running up to him. He vaguely recognizes him as one of Eren's friends—the other one that had been at the court trial that one time. Before engaging the kid in conversation, he looks at the men that had given him trouble one last time. Their eyes are wide and jaws dropped—obviously they hadn't realized just whom they had provoked. Levi isn't wearing his uniform so he doesn't really blame them for not recognizing him. When he isn't in uniform, Levi looks like an ordinary, rather small man. His appearance is less than daunting. But he isn't to be crossed in any case.

"Sir, you should come with me," the blonde kid says urgently. His eyes are frantic and his voice is shrill with panic.

"Why, what is it?" Levi's own voice contrasts drastically with the kid's—completely neutral and composed.

"It's the commander, he's been injured." Levi is trained to withhold any emotional response until the time is better suited so right now, in front of this kid, he doesn't show any reaction.

"Where is he?" he questions with controlled calm.

"He was taken to the infirmary. I think Miss Hanji is with him too."

"Where's Eren?" Irvin is important to Levi personally but Eren is most important to humanity.

"He's with General Pixis and Mikasa, I think." Levi nods. He trusts Pixis enough to keep an eye on Eren for the time being. Now Levi can focus on getting to Irvin's side as quickly as possible.

He makes it to the infirmary with Eren's friend. They're led to one of the rooms toward the back of the hospital where the patients of higher status are taken. The rooms are larger in size and much more hospitable. The door to Irvin's room is shut and it looms ominously. Eren's friend—Armin—stops just in front of it.

"I…I'll just wait out here." Levi takes the handle of the door but can't bring himself to pull it open. He's apprehensive. How badly is he hurt? Will he be okay? These are questions that he desperately wants the answers to but he's also deathly afraid of them. He takes a deep breath through his nose and before he can convince himself otherwise, slips inside.

First his eyes land on Hanji who's standing in front of the large cot. At the sound of the door clicking shut, she turns to face him. Her eyes are red and swollen and she has her glasses between her thumb and forefinger, wiping at the moisture collected on the inside of the lenses.

"Levi," she chokes in a breathy sob. More tears squeeze out her eyes and she turns away. Levi feels like he's going to be sick. Hanji is known to overreact but he has a gut feeling that this situation is bad. Really bad. He approaches the cot and then he finally focuses on the body lounged there.

Ice water rushes through his veins. He can't move. All he can do is stare at Commander Irvin. He lies still, deathly still under the filthy sheets. His entire torso is wrapped in red stained gauze and a sheen film of sweat sheets his battered face. Levi forces himself to move but his limbs are numb and heavy. Every step drains all of his strength. When he stands over Irvin's body, his eyes land on the severed arm. The commander's arm is completely gone…there's no way he'll be able to fight with an injury like that. This is it for him.

Levi's legs tremble under his weight and then fail altogether as he collapses to his knees. Desperately he clutches onto Irvin's intact hand in both of his and presses their hands to his forehead. The sharp features of his face are schooled into a mask of neutrality but there are cracks and faults so small that only those who truly know Levi can see them. Pressure is building up in the backs of his eye sockets and his eyes fall shut. He mustn't do this. It's not the role of a pawn.

"Commander Irvin," his voice cracks, just barely audible and rendering him for the breaking puppet that he is. He's afraid to he speak any louder for he'll surely fall apart. If only he'd been at the commander's side… If only he hadn't been injured. He could have… He would have…

"Lance Corporal Rivaille." Levi clenches his jaw and attempts to reel in his erratic emotions before meeting Irvin's steel eyes. For a moment, they look at each other in complete silence. The battle for Levi's composure is a hopeless one. In a matter of time he'll lose himself. A twitch of some kind of reaction passes over Irvin's brow as he takes in Levi's state.

"Hanji, leave us," he commands. Levi registers the sound of the door clicking shut behind him in the back of his mind. Quickly Irvin wrenches his hand from Levi's grip and covers his subordinate's eyes with his palm.

"Don't cry for me," he murmurs in a low voice with gentleness that he shows only to his corporal. Irvin doesn't want to see him cry. Together, they have hardened their hearts until they were numb to the burdens of war. Irvin isn't an exception to this. If Levi's walls fall now then he will never be the merciless soldier that the world needs him to be. Irvin refuses to be Levi's weakness. Droplets gather at the inside of Irvin's palm but they never fall past his fingers. Even if Irvin has to hold the tears back for his corporal, he will. Irvin's head bows and he presses his forehead against Levi's.

"Levi, you mustn't show others your weakness, you know that." Levi doesn't reply, or maybe he can't because his voice is still lodged in his throat. They rest like that until Levi regains his poise. Once his breathing has slowed to a regular even pace, Irvin gives him space and removes his hand. Small droplets still cling to his lashes but his eyes are no longer red and they've regained their hard detachment. He blinks away the last remnants of his tears and holds his head a little higher.

"You're filthy. I'll make those useless MP assholes bring you proper sheets." Irvin almost smiles.

* * *

Eren waits outside the infirmary door, back pressed against the wall and head hanging to his chest. Levi is still inside with Irvin. The corporal has been in there for a long time and he can't help but wonder what they're talking about. Is Levi sad for Irvin? Or maybe they're discussing their futures now that Irvin won't be able to lead the scouting legion anymore. The door opens and Levi appears. Eren isn't surprised to see that he doesn't look concerned by Irvin's condition. Levi is a heartless bastard after all. Maybe that's why Irvin and Levi get along so nicely—neither one has any mercy.

"Captain," Eren calls. Levi turns to him.

"What is it?" And then Eren sees it. There's a flint of something in Levi's expression. Eren thinks for a moment before answering.

"How about we…relieve some of our anger?" he suggests quietly. He's hesitant because he knows that a Lance Corporal has a reputation to uphold. It's risky to disobey rules.

"What are you blabbering on about?" Corporal Levi doesn't understand. It's clear from the way his eyes home in on Eren.

"Let's kill some titans," Eren replies and he sounds fervent with a drive for revenge. Levi's cold eyes widen and there's a flicker of indecision, or at least Eren thinks that it's indecision, and then he looks away with a scoff.

"Bloodthirsty are we?"

"Aren't you?" Eren already knows the answer. He saw it in the corporal's eyes earlier, he wouldn't have asked in any other case. It's taking all of the corporal's self-control and sense of duty to keep from going out and slaughtering every titan that dares encounter him.

"Eren, you have to get your anger under control." But the corporal's levelheadedness only fuels the flames. Levi leans against the wall, arms crossed over his chest, and eyes focused straight-ahead—he looks to be entirely unaffected. A fist slams into the wall and it fissures under the force. The titan power is surfacing. If anger hadn't clouded Eren's mind, he might've feared his own strength but at this moment, he doesn't care. Levi doesn't even flinch at the outburst.

"Captain!" he shouts. Eren is angry. He's angry at everyone for sacrificing themselves for his sake. And he's angrier at himself for not being able to protect them. "I can't just sit here and do nothing!" He has to do something to repay everyone. Abruptly Levi's head snaps in his direction and he lands a fist across Eren's jaw. He doubles over and releases a pained groan.

"Calm down, that's an order." Eren spits blood and wipes the excess on the back of his knuckles as Levi stands over him, coolly watching.

"Why won't you do anything? Everyone is getting hurt and dying. Even the commander—" Levi cuts in.

"The commander wouldn't want us going out on a senseless titan hunt in the heat of vengeance." Eren glares and doesn't say anything because he knows that he's right. It pisses him off.

"No matter how angry you get, you have to control yourself."

"Are you saying that you don't want to find the titan that took a piece out of the commander and kill it?"

"Kill it? No," Levi answers mechanically and without changing expression. A sigh builds up in Eren's chest and it almost passes his lips, that is, until Levi's face darkens and danger flashes behind his sharp eyes.

"I want to find that fucker, rip its arms and legs off its body, force the limbs down its own throat and slit its gut. Then I'll watch as the entrails spill out and let it squirm in its own intestines and gore, relishing the sight of it suffering and unable to move. And once it regenerates, I'll start all over again." The image of Levi prancing about in Titan guts etches into Eren's mind; it makes his stomach flip and bile surge up his throat.

"Is that what you wanted to hear?" Levi glances at him from the corner of his eye. If he notices the sickly green tint to Eren's face, he doesn't mention it. Eren doesn't reply and his head hangs in shame.

"I used to be like you, you know." At that Eren straightens up and eyes the corporal. He's not looking back at him and he has a faraway look.

"Full of unquenchable hatred and blood thirst. All I wanted to do was slaughter as many titans as I could, I'd even disobey my orders if it meant another opportunity to hack away at titans. The commander changed that part of me. I learned to control the burning rage inside me and you should too." With that Levi pushes away from the wall and begins down the hall.

"Come on, we're wasting time." Eren catches up and walks side-by-side with the corporal.

* * *

Because titans have demolished their living quarters, Levi and Eren are forced to remain in the inner wall where the Military Police stay. Fortunately they had a vacant residence. It's all a part of their plan, Levi knows. They don't trust Eren, especially now that the others with the ability to transform have proven to be nothing but traitors so they want to keep Eren close. If they could they would just steal him right out of Levi's custody but luckily they don't have that kind of authority.

The place is nice and clean with a queen size bed and they even get their own bathroom with running water—it's much nicer than the abandoned castle that they had inhabited before and Eren is actually allowed to sleep in a bed. Up to this point he's been forced to sleep on a rigid cot in the dungeon. Somehow Levi managed to convince the military police to let them room together and Eren is eternally grateful for it.

Levi emerges from the bath with a towel hanging slackly low at his waist. His hipbones jut out just above the material and traces of dew stick to his skin, shimmering in the candlelight like stars.

"Do you blame me?" Eren asks quietly from the bed. He's sat cross-legged on the right side, eyes averted away from the corporal uncomfortably. The sight of Levi's nearly naked body strangely makes his own body heat up. Levi lazily rolls his head in Eren's direction as he rummages for his nightclothes.

"For what?" He's unable to meet the corporal's eyes. He's afraid, afraid to hear Levi's answer.

"For the commander's injury." There's a beat of unbearable silence that makes Eren's gut writhe and squirm.

"And what if I do?" Dread digs deep into the marrow of Eren's bones. He doesn't dare breathe.

"I'd apologize and try to make up for it." A snort bursts from Levi and Eren ducks lower at the sound.

"And how would you do that?" Eren falls silent. He doesn't know how he'd do it but he'd find a way. He'd do anything if it meant forgiveness.

"I—I don't know," he admits silently.

"Apologies do nothing but give the person at fault a false sense of relief. They're pathetic. Don't ask stupid questions if you can't recompense." It's true. An apology wouldn't do anything at all except make Eren feel better. But still, he can't think about anything else as long as he is around Levi. Does the corporal hate him now? He has to know.

"I have to know if you blame me." Eren meets Levi's deadpan stubbornly—chin clinched tight and eyes narrow. The stoic attitude that Levi has never falters.

"Of course I don't, there was nothing anyone could do," he replies with a dismissive wave of his hand as if the question is hardly worth his time.

"But if I hadn't been captured, no one would be hurt—" Levi interrupts.

"Oi you little brat, do you want me to blame you or something?" Eren fanatically shakes his head. If the corporal had blamed him, Eren would have….

"Seems to me like you blame yourself." The bed shifts with Levi's added weight. Eren glances at him. His hair glistens with moisture and his cheeks are still flushed from the bath's hot steam. The towel that had been wrapped around his waist is now draped over the back of his neck and collects the bits of water that drip from the strands. Eren doesn't reply. Honestly he does blame himself and he figures that everyone else did too. He's supposed to be humanity's last hope so why did he keep screwing them all over?

"Take a bath. You smell."

"What?" Eren lifts his arm and takes a whiff of his armpit. He didn't smell; Levi was lying. He thinks that it's Levi's way of showing compassion. Any other person would've said "Go soak in the bath, it will help you feel better" so it'd be obvious that the person cares but Levi isn't that type of person.

Eren sighs dejectedly as he crawls off the bed and leaves to bathe. The water is so hot that when he submerges himself, his flesh turns pink and his body tingles. The intense heat relaxes his tense muscles and his eyes close. The painful thoughts and fears fade for a moment and he's just a blank slate.

Is this how the corporal feels all the time? He just forces the thoughts away so that he doesn't feel at all? It's easier this way. He's numb to everything around him. Living as a heartless bastard might not be so bad. Maybe Eren should build up his own walls so that he'll never feel helpless again.

When Eren returns to the bedroom, Levi is already curled up on the left side of the bed fast asleep. Eren blatantly stares. He can't help it. Levi's sleeping face is strangely lax and vulnerable. He looks nothing like his cold, guarded self. Eren slides into his side of the bed, careful not to disturb him. He lies on his side, facing Levi. Levi's arm is tucked beneath his head and his lips are parted slightly. He appears childlike in that position. Slowly Eren's eyelids fall shut and he drifts off with the image of Levi's peaceful sleeping face fixed on his mind.

* * *

During the middle of the night, he wakes abruptly. He's disoriented and he doesn't know why he has awakened. There's an uncomfortable prickling sensation at the back of his neck, the feeling that someone is watching him.

When the grogginess of sleep has faded enough, he realizes that his arm is curled around Levi's waist and under his hand the corporal's shirt has hiked up so that a sliver of his stomach is exposed. Eren's heart beats wildly. He is so close to the corporal that he can smell the soapy scent coming from his hair. Eren's fingers press against Levi's abdomen and he welcomes the feel of the sculpted muscle against his palm. He dares to pull Levi closer to his body. The heat of having another person close to him cradles him in a sense of security.

He's so warm. Eren nestles into the back of Levi's neck and tightens his hold around his slim waist. To a degree his mind is still bleary with sleep and his thoughts aren't coherent so touching the corporal doesn't seem inappropriate. His fingers delve higher up Levi's stomach, to his chest. Bumps and scars mar his smooth skin. He traces a single scar from his midsection down to his pelvis where patches of soft downy hair brush his fingertips.

"What do you think you are doing?" Eren jerks away with a startled cry. He is so shocked that he starts to tip over the other side of the bed. A hand shoots out, catches his flailing wrist, and pulls him forward before he can fall. The pull is too strong and Eren suddenly lands in Levi's lap, trapped by the iron cage of his arms. Eren gasps and another cry is built up in the back of his throat but before it is unleashed, a hand clamps over his mouth to muffle it and hot breath ghosts the tip of his ear.

"Quiet!" Levi hisses. A shudder travels up Eren's spine. The corporal's breath tickles the inside of his ear.

"We're being monitored." Another shiver works its way up his body, this time from a combination of Levi's breath tickling him and the unease that his words instigate. Eren's eyes dart around in search for a watching eye but he sees nothing but darkness. He attempts to say something only to realize that Levi is still covering his mouth.

"Mmm mmf nnng." Levi lowers his hand.

"Why are they watching us?" Eren whispers. Levi taps Eren's temple with his forefinger.

"Think about it, why were the MP so eager to have us stay here in the first place. Here, in their central headquarters without our gear?" Eren's eyes widen.

"So they could watch us?" Levi shakes his head.

"So they could watch _you_." Eren's stomach drops and he groans.

"Don't tell me they're suspicious of me now!"

"They've always had their doubts but even more so now that the identities of the armored and colossal titan have been revealed as two of your squad members. And not to mention the female titan and Ymir…"

"I didn't know about any of that! Isn't it obvious that I'm on your side?" Eren whisper shrieks.

"It's quite a coincidence that you all happened to be in the same squad at the same time." What?! The frustration of having the whole world turn their backs on him rouses angry tears in his eyes. His chest tightens with rage and desperation. Didn't anyone believe in him?

"I don't know why it turned out that way! Why won't anyone believe in me?" he cries. He claws at the sides of his face and squeezes his eyes shut. What more can he do to prove himself?

"Don't be stupid." Eren freezes and he looks at Levi in puzzlement. The darkness shrouds his face so he can't tell exactly what kind of expression he wears. "Do you think the commander would've sacrificed his arm for you if he didn't believe in you? Do you think I'd share the same bed with someone I thought to be a traitor?" Eren doesn't speak. He can't find his voice. Levi disentangles himself from Eren and lies back down.

"Unless you have a death wish, keep your hands to yourself, got it?" Blood rushes to Eren's face and his heart stutters. Right…. he pretty much felt up the corporal while he'd been sleeping. How humiliating. Internally he groans.

"Yes sir," he replies quietly. He collapses onto his back and covers his face in his hands.

"And Eren, if you betray humanity, I won't hesitate to kill you. Don't forget that." A smile stretches across Eren's face.

"Thank you," he whispers and rolls onto his side, ease replacing any of the tension he'd felt. At least the corporal was on his side. As long as one person believed in him, he'd keep fighting.

* * *

"Agh!" Eren cries as he jolts upright. The pillow that had been thrown at his head, startling him awake, now lies harmlessly in his lap. Levi is already dressed and stands over him with his arms crossed.

"Oh, you're alive. You slept so deeply I thought you'd fallen into a coma." Eren laughs self-consciously.

"Sorry, my mother always told me I slept like death." Levi tosses clothes at Eren and they land on his head.

"Get dressed, I've got a feeling we'll be having visitors any moment now." Eren scrambles out of bed and quickly throws on the clothes. It's just a simple shirt and slacks much like the ones Levi is wearing, and just as he finishes settling the slacks at his waist, there's a loud knock at the door.

"Corporal Rivaille, you and Jeager have been summoned to the conference room."

"Shocker," Levi replies with a roll of his eye. He swings the door open and files out with Eren close behind. They're escorted by two MPs on either side of them. Down the long hall, they walk in silence until surprisingly Levi is the one to break it.

"Say Eren, do you know the real reason why Scouts are better fighters than the MP?" Eren eyes him curiously and shrugs.

"Is it because we go outside the walls?" The two MPs are tense and Eren can almost feel their buzzing irritation.

"The MP could go outside the walls too, you know." Eren catches on quick to Levi's intent and joins in. Levi _wants_ to piss off the MPs.

"But aren't they too afraid?" A crooked smile tugs the corner of Levi's mouth.

"That's one reason. Another reason is that they're too sore from being fucked too many times up the asshole." Levi turns to the MP by his side.

"Feeling okay? Your commander didn't shove his dick too far up your ass, did he?" The MP glares at him and practically shakes with rage but he doesn't dare say anything. He knows Levi could send him soaring with a single blow. Eren tries to hold back the laughter rising in his chest but it's too much and it comes out as a fit of inelegant snorts. He's still laughing even when they've come to a stop. They've come to a large empty room with two wooden doors at the other end—one on the right side and one on the left.

"Wait here, our superior will be with you shortly," one of the MPs spits through grit teeth. They quickly march toward the two doors and exit out the right side.

"I wonder who the hell summoned us," Levi mutters irritably. He props his shoulder against one of the marble buttresses and crosses his right ankle behind his left. Eren assumes Levi's injury has healed completely since his limp has all but disappeared but he can't be entirely sure. The corporal could be downplaying his true discomfort.

"Whoever the bastard is, he's a lame-ass host. Who makes their company wait?" Right on cue, the right door at the end of the room slams open and a tall attractive man dressed in a white lab coat enters through. He has a face untouched by war and his light hair is pulled neatly back in a sleek ponytail.

"Greetings Lance Corporal Rivaille, it's an honor to finally meet you! I apologize for the delay. I'm the official doctor of the Military Police. Everyone here just calls me Doc." A disturbingly wide grin splits the man's face in half, displaying a perfect set of pearly white teeth, and he extends his hand to Levi. He regards the man's long spindle fingers blankly for a moment and then slowly shifts his gaze up to the man's face. He doesn't look impressed.

"Why have you called us here?" Behind his glasses, Doc's brown eyes brighten painfully so and he drops the unmet handshake without appearing disappointed.

"Oh so eager to get down to the nitty-gritty. Well, you see, I'm a man of science and as a scientist it's my job to uncover the truths behind the mysteries of our world. The titans are the most spectacular beings that walk our lands. Unfortunately, obtaining a living titan requires travelling to the outer wall and unnecessarily risking lives. There's no reason for it, not now that we have our very own titans that walk amongst humankind! However, unfortunately for me military personnel have detained the other human titans. So that leaves only one human titan for me to conduct my experiments on." Doc's unbearably bright eyes focus on Eren hungrily. Levi steps to the side with a strong arm extended in front of Eren protectively.

"What a long winded speech, Doctor. I think I fell asleep somewhere in the middle of it."

"How cruel!" Doctor cries with a frown. "And the articulation was conducted beautifully, if I do say so myself." Levi's head tilts lazily to the side.

"Keep talking and you might actually bore me to death." A humorless smirk mars the doctor's handsome face. He's far too animated for any normal human being.

"Your impertinence really is most infamous. I hear you'll only show one man your respect." Levi shrugs.

"I only respect those who deserve it." Eren thinks he knows whom they mean but he's not entirely sure.

"Pity and I thought this would be a pleasant encounter." The doctor's eyes flash dangerously. Before anyone can react, each of Eren's arms is taken hold by two MPs that appeared from seemingly nowhere.

"Hey! Let me—ah!" Eren cries out as they jerk him away from Levi and toward this strange, energetic man.

"Release him," Levi orders. "He's under _my_ custody, you can't just take him from me." Doctor smiles and it's an all too sweet kind of smile that leaves an ugly taste in the mouth.

"I'm sorry Corporal Rivaille but you don't have the authority here to order me around." Levi growls in impatience.

"Tch, you'll disobey direct orders from General Zacklay?"

"That's right. This isn't war I'm dealing with here, it's science." Levi takes another step forward with fists clenched tightly. The muscles lining his forearms flex dauntingly.

"Fine, if you want him, you'll have to fight me for him."

Instantly two more MPs take Levi's arms and he easily ducks out of their holds. He lands a hard kick in one of their shins and then he turns to knee the other hard in the gut. The MP keels over and retches whatever he had for lunch, soiling the ground between his feet. Levi's nose scrunches up in disgust.

"Ugh…"

The one that had taken a hit to his shin recovers quickly and while the other MP's revolting filth distracts Levi, slings his arm around Levi's neck in a chokehold. The corporal is too strong though and twists his arm until it cracks under the pressure. The MP yelps in pain and Levi adds even more pressure until it's on the verge of breaking the bone.

There's a sadistic glint in Levi's eye. His tight self-restraint is keeping him from unleashing his full strength on this MP but it's clear that what he wants most is to make him suffer greatly. The second MP charges at Levi with a hand still clutching onto his bruised stomach and excess vomit sticking to his lips but quickly freezes mid-step, open fear displayed on his face. Corporal Levi is watching him whilst twisting the MP's arm further and further out of shape, daring him to move.

"Come any closer and I'll completely shatter this man's arm so that he'll never be able to move it again," he threatens as calmly as a person might comment on the weather.

"Levi, let the nice man go." Both Levi's and Eren's heads snap in the direction of the deep authoritative voice. It is Commander Irvin. The dark bruises that had littered his fair skin before are faded and those that remain are yellow in color. He looks to be relatively whole, that is, other than the slack sleeve that hangs where his right arm should be.

At the command, Levi releases the MP's arm and the instant he's free to move, he whirls around and kicks the back of Levi's legs, forcing him into a kneel in front of him. He fists Levi's thick hair and jerks his head back while bent close so that they're eye-to-eye. Levi does nothing. He doesn't even flinch if he feels the pain of his hair being ripped from his scalp.

"Docile as a kitten now that the Commander is here, huh? What a shame, I like 'em fierce."

"Please don't bait my corporal, I won't be liable if he decides to bite," Commander Irvin intervenes with fabricated concern. His thick brows twitch with what Eren can only interpret as anger. It's rare for the commander to show any kind of reaction, so it impacts Eren more than it should.

"Now, now, no need to get all worked up," Doctor merrily chimes in. Eren had almost forgotten about him, he'd been so quiet. "Please soldier, if you would free our beloved Lance Corporal, I would truly appreciate it." Even his voice is too sweet to be considered kind. The MP lets go of Levi's hair and he climbs to a stand.

"Irvin…" Levi trails off. It's the first time Eren has ever heard gentleness in his voice. The stony mask that Eren had branded the commander with melts when Irvin regards Levi. His cold blue eyes suddenly appear affectionate and even a small smile tugs at his mouth. Eren wonders what exactly is transpiring between the two at that moment. But before Eren's mind has a chance to come up with any possibilities, the moment ends and Irvin's gaze shifts to the doctor.

"Doctor, it's a pleasure to meet again," he greets with trained professionalism. Doctor returns the greeting enthusiastically.

"Commander Irvin, as always I'm at awe by your presence. Such a strong aura radiates from you, it's practically overwhelming." Doctor clutches his chest dramatically as if his heart would burst right out of him.

"You're _too_ kind." Irvin emphasizes the word 'too' in a way that hints at his slight distaste. If Doctor picks up on it, he doesn't show it.

"So what brings you here anyway? I'm sure a busy man like you didn't come just to visit a man as insignificant as myself."

"Hmm, insignificant? You underrate yourself, Doctor. When I heard Levi and Eren were relocated to Military Police headquarters I assumed you'd be after Eren as soon as you could. And I'm here to remind you of Zacklay's ruling. Eren is not to be tampered with." Doctor's bottom lip juts out in a pout.

"You really know how to dampen a person's mood. Can't I just poke at his body a little?" Eren stiffens. He wanted to what his body? Irvin smiles but it's a dangerous smile.

"I'm afraid not." The doctor adjusts his glasses and lets out a sigh.

"Very well, I guess there's nothing I can do then." At that the two MPs that had been holding onto Eren freed him. Eren rolls his aching shoulders and bounces on the balls of his feet.

"I don't know why you thought the military police would be enough to restrain Eren anyway, he's a goddamn titan," Levi points out.

"Yes well, I knew he wouldn't transform knowing there was a possibility he'd harm _you _in the process." A silence follows. It's uncomfortable for Eren. It makes him sweat. Something in the way the doctor made that statement implies that Eren didn't want to hurt Levi not for the sole reason that he was his superior and corporal but because Eren might consider Levi as special to him. Eren thinks Levi also catches the suggestion because he visibly tenses and seems to have lost his tongue. Luckily, Irvin speaks so he doesn't have to endure the awkwardness for long.

"Levi, take Eren with you to train. I have a few things to discuss with the doctor." Eren mechanically goes to Levi's side and together they turn to leave but before they make it out of the room, the MP from earlier, the one who had forced Levi to his knees, blocks their path. Eren glances behind his shoulder at Irvin, hoping that he's still watching them but he's disappeared along with the doctor.

"It's been fun Lance Corporal Rivaille, maybe we can do this again sometime."

"Only if you want your arm ripped from its socket." A smirk slants the MP's mouth and he leans down to say something directly into the corporal's ear. It's too quiet for Eren to hear but when the MP starts to pull back, Levi grabs the back of his head and slams his face into his knee. There's a sickening crunch as bones splinter under the sheer force and blood spews from his nose like a fountain as he shrieks in agony. He spits curse after curse between pathetic moans.

"Say something like that again and I won't hold back." Levi skirts around the bleeding capsized soldier and Eren tentatively follows a few paces behind in bewilderment.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note:** **There's a lot of dialogue here. I'm the kind of person that loves to write detail but I tried my best to keep it short- I don't want to bore anyone...****I also tried to add in some humor but I'm not a naturally funny person. My sense of humor consists of mainly dark sarcasm. **

**Confession: this is the first fanfic I've ever posted on here. I love to write but I'm not confident enough to let others read it.  
**

* * *

**I have a writing playlist that I listened to as I wrote this chapter and thought I'd share it with you:**

**1. Universe by Ghost Town**

**2. Monster (DotEXE 2013 Rework) by Meg & Dia **

**3. Insanity [Frost Mix] by Circus- P**

**4. 威風堂々 by some guy I don't know... It's not the original because there are these weird moans in the beginning that make me uncomfortable to listen to (O~O)  
**

**5. (and of course) Midnight City by M83 **

* * *

Eren wants to know what the MP had said to make Levi flip shit, not that Levi ever really loses his cool but that had been close enough. He's careful to give Levi space as they walk through the halls. He's afraid if he gets too close, he'll end up like those military police soldiers.

"Sooooo, what did that guy say to you anyway?" Eren casually asks.

"That's none of your damn business." Eren's mouth clamps shut with a snap. Clearly, the corporal isn't going to elaborate on the subject. Levi pushes through two giant doors and they're greeted by a warm sunny day. He turns and Eren follows mechanically.

"Where are we going?" he asks after they've taken so many turns that his head is spinning.

"Out of sight where the MP can't find you."

It had been difficult to find a place where the military police couldn't find them. Eren had felt eyes follow him everywhere they went. Ironically, the one place they didn't find any MPs had been the Military Police training facility. Levi scowls and runs a finger over the dusty shelves meant for storing spare maneuvering gear.

"Looks like those bastards sold out their gear." Eren's eyes widen.

"What if they run out?"

"Then they're fucked." They walk deeper into the abandoned building. Other equipment meant for strength and endurance training are worn and run down—most likely unusable. They pass a musty library with old files depicting titans but they're outdated. The entire facility is just filled with junk. At the other end of the building there's a door that they walk through and they're outside again but it's enclosed by a cement wall.

"Where are we?" Eren wonders aloud. Levi extends an arm and points across the courtyard.

"Those look like old stables." They walk to where Levi had pointed to and his guess is correct. They are standing in front of shabby broken-down horse stables.

"Do the military police even keep horses anymore?" Levi nods.

"Yeah, they breed them deep in the city. Only the strongest horses are given to the military." Suddenly there's a thumping sound and a shrill cry. It comes from the end stall.

"There's no way that could be…" Eren tracks off as they creep closer. Levi is the first to peek through. Immediately he whips open the door and sure enough, a grimy, malnourished mare stands inside. It lets out another cry and stares at them.

"You've got to be kidding," Levi mutters.

"It looks scared," Eren notes. Levi sighs, rolls up his sleeves, and slowly approaches the shaking horse. It eyes him inquisitively and raises its head. It towers over Levi.

"Be careful!" Eren whispers-cries. Levi extends an open palm and cautiously places it on its muzzle.

"It's fine. He's half-starved to death and filthy but he's tame." Levi clicks his tongue and the horse follows him out the stall like it's always been by the corporal's side; like it's known Levi its whole life.

There's a hose with running water just outside the stables that they use to bathe the neglected horse. At first it lags and splutters mud and Eren thinks that it won't work but soon a thick stream of clear clean water flows through. They scrub and brush its hair for hours until his black coat gleams. It's hot but the cool water keeps Eren from sweating.

He's holding the hose and Levi is brushing at one of the mare's legs and without thinking he goes to wipe his forehead with the hand that's holding the hose. The stream of water douses Levi from head to toe. The hose clatters against the ground and Eren stops breathing.

"I'M SO SORRY!" he cries immediately, already feeling the pain that Levi is sure to unleash upon him. He crouches beside him but isn't sure what to do so his hands hover awkwardly over Levi's shoulders. He's not looking at Eren and remains motionless. Then his mouth opens and Eren ducks in fear.

"Strip."

"H-Huh?" Levi's head snaps to the side. With the movement, his hair sprays water at Eren.

"Take your shirt off." Eren swallows and peels off his shirt. Right as it's pulled over his head, it's snatched out of Eren's hand. Levi stands with the shirt clutched in his fist. He tugs the back of his own drenched shirt over his head and throws it to the ground. It lands with a wet splat by Eren's feet.

A dizzying heat envelopes Eren's body—he tries to convince himself that it's just from the sun beating down on his bare back but his eyes won't leave the corporal's exposed pale chest. The reminiscence of feeling Levi's smooth skin last night tingles his fingertips. Levi slips on Eren's shirt and it falls loosely around his small frame. The ends of the sleeves go inches past his fingertips and the bottom hangs at his thighs. Eren slams a hand over his mouth to hold back a laugh. The laugh dies in his chest because the corporal's scary eyes lock on him.

"You're off hose duty from now on," he deadpans.

"Yes sir!"

Later Levi brings food back. They're careful not to overfeed the horse and he stamps in agitation because it wants more but he'll become sick if they relent.

"Here I brought you back something too," Levi says while shoving a wrap at him. It's a piece of meat and a bread roll. Eren's mouth waters.

"Thank you!" While he contentedly bites down into the meat, Levi silently strokes the horse's muzzle, his back in Eren's direction.

Once Eren swallows a few more bites he asks, "What're you thinking about?" Levi pauses before replying.

"Why do you want to know?" Eren shrugs.

"I dunno. You're pretty quiet so I was just wondering." To Eren's surprise, Levi actually answers his question.

"If you really want to know, I was thinking about your traitor squad members."

"Hmm? You mean Reiner, Bertholdt, and Ymir?" Levi pauses a moment.

"They were never actually caught, which means they're somewhere outside the wall."

"Yeah, they wanted to take me to their hometown before. They're probably there now."

Levi contemplates Eren's words then asks, "Do you think you could find it?" Eren thinks for a moment.

"Maybe, I remember the general direction they were headed."

"We _need_ answers." Eren eyes Levi curiously. The corporal's tone had been determined, he's thinking up some kind of plan, no doubt.

"What're you saying?" The corporal turns to him with a deadpan.

"You're going to talk to them and obtain as much information as you can."

"But I can't leave the walls without permission."

"I'll get you your goddamn consent." Eren pauses with a mouthful of food stuffed in his cheek to ponder for a moment and then swallows.

"Do you think they'll trust me enough to let me go alone?"

"Hell no, that's why I'm going with you." He and the corporal alone on a mission? That's an unnerving thought; his heart picks up in speed for some reason unknown to him.

"What if Reiner and Bertholdt attack you?" Eren didn't like picturing Levi taking on two titans as formidable as the armored and colossal titans alone. He might have a chance at defeating the colossal but the armored titan was different. Levi's swords wouldn't work against his hardened skin.

"We'll just have to hope that they won't." There is also one other problem.

"It might be smart to have one other person that knows in which direction they had been going, just in case I'm wrong." Eren isn't entirely confident that he remembers exactly where they had been heading, he just has a general idea since he'd been unconscious for part of the trip.

"Who did you have in mind?"

"Mikasa."

* * *

Levi doesn't even knock before slinging the door open to Irvin's room. He's seated in a large leather sofa, conversing with an animated Hanji. They both whip around to look at him when he enters.

"Well if it isn't the old man clean-freak!" Hanji greets with a scary wide grin.

"Who're you calling old?" He passes her by without a second glance and walks directly up to Irvin.

"I need to discuss something with you." Irvin eyes him inquisitively.

"Very well, take a seat." Levi sits in the sofa chair to Irvin's right with a leg crossed over his knee and meets Irvin's expectant gaze.

"Guess I'll…see you guys…around…" says Hanji as she reluctantly steps backward toward the door.

"Hanji stay," Levi orders without bothering to turn to her. Hanji sucks in a giant breath.

"YES!" she shrieks at full volume and leaps into the air with a triumphant fist. "I've ALWAYS wanted to watch you two engage in intercourse!" Both Levi and Irvin whirl in her direction and stare at her with identical masks of bewildered shock.

"Have those titan fumes finally rotted your brain? What the hell are you talking about?" Levi snaps. Hanji purses her lips.

"Wait, you mean, you're _not_ having kinky man on man sex every night?" Levi and Irvin choke on their own breath. Only Hanji can completely break the two stony men of their steady composure.

"What gave you the impression that we had _that_ kind of relationship?" Irvin demands.

"Huh…" Hanji pushes her glasses further up her nose, the glare on the lenses hiding her eyes, and shrugs. "No reason."

"Deviant woman," Levi grumbles and then refocuses his attention on the matter at hand.

"I want to go to the outer wall with Eren and Mikasa Ackerman to find the colossal and armored titans." Irvin's eyes narrow.

"What will you do if you find them?"

"We'll question them and learn what they know."

"And why do you think they'd cooperate?"

"I don't know if they'll be willing to talk but Eren says that when they had taken him before, they were going to tell him everything once they made it to their hometown."

"So you're thinking that if Eren goes to their hometown now, they'll stick to their word?" Levi nods.

"It's not much of a lead and there's a good chance we'll be wasting our time but it's the only thing we've got," Levi finishes with resolve.

* * *

Irvin speaks with Pixis first. He's a wise man and has spent many years leading men into combat—quick and levelheaded, he's a man to follow. Irvin is enigmatic about the mission, he doesn't want rumor to spread. He wants to avoid as much conflict as possible and he trusts Pixis not to blabber about it to the other military personnel. Pixis thinks it over and nods.

"I think it's worth a shot." He says this and then tells him to speak with general Zacklay directly. Zacklay is the man in charge of all military personnel and conduction after all. And it'd be the only way to get this mission to pass without causing a scene.

Zacklay is a powerful man with a lot of influence. Meeting with him isn't easy. Luckily, Irvin is also powerful and respected and Zacklay agrees to a meeting. Irvin travels all the way to the heart of the city where Zacklay's home is. It's a mansion of a home with marble columns and a stone fountain in the courtyard. Irvin didn't even know homes like this one existed.

He's buzzed through the gateway and is escorted to the home's giant front door. The door slowly opens and the general appears. He's wearing his expensive attire and his beard is pristinely combed.

"Commander Irvin Smith, I'm glad you could make it here." Irvin bows his head respectfully.

"Thank you for agreeing to meet with me and on such short notice." Zacklay shakes his head with a smile.

"Not a problem, please come inside." He pushes the door open further to allow Irvin entry. Irvin steps inside and they delve deeper into the mansion.

Everything is white—the floors, the walls, the ceiling. The floors are shiny and the heels of their shoes click loudly with each step. Zacklay leads him to a large room with a round granite dining table. Already two glasses of white wine have been poured and two platefuls of steaming seafood have been set. They sit and Irvin takes a sip of the wine. It's rich and burns his throat pleasantly.

"So Commander, what is it you want to talk about?" Zacklay cuts at his lobster and shovels in a bite. Irvin doesn't beat around the bush.

"I believe sending Eren along with Lance Corporal Rivaille is our only chance at learning more about the titans. The traitors were once friends of Eren's, they may be willing to speak honestly with him." Zacklay muses over this while chewing his food.

"Hmm, Lance Corporal Rivaille is the small man that had been at the court trial, am I right? The one who made quite the impression?"

"Yes, that was him." Zacklay takes a sip of his wine.

"Hmm." When he sets down the glass, he adjusts his glasses then folds his hands under his chin and regards Irvin with his stern authority.

"To be honest, the success of this operation seems very unlikely and we can't afford to lose Jaeger."

"Yes but if we do nothing, they will come after Eren anyway and more lives will be lost." Zacklay nods in agreement.

"You have a strong point, Commander." His hands unfold and he picks up his fork again.

"I'll give consent for this operation on one condition." Irvin waits for him to continue.

"If you can give me Rivaille, then we have a deal." He says this without the slightest bit of shame and scoops up a forkful of mashed potato.

"You want me to give you the corporal?" Irvin is surprised. He hadn't been expecting such a request from someone as respected and strict as the general.

"Yes." Irvin clears his throat uncomfortably.

"My apologies if I'm misunderstanding but are you saying that you want to bed him?"

Zacklay downs his entire glass of wine in one go and sets it down before replying, a predatory glint in his eye, "What I'm saying, Commander Smith, is that I desire him and I want to ride him until he can't stand up straight."

* * *

"You've been spending a lot of time with Captain Levi," Mikasa says quietly. They're perched by a tree, outside MP headquarters. It's nostalgic sitting here with Mikasa, thinks Eren. It reminds him so much of when they were kids before the breach of wall Maria. Now all they need is Armin and it'd be as close to a family reunion as they can get.

"Well _yeah_, I'm under his custody."

"That doesn't make you his property." Eren's eyes narrow.

"I'm _not _his property. And he doesn't treat me like some slave!" Mikasa doesn't look at him. Her legs are pulled up to her chest and she's gazing off somewhere in the distance. She's not wearing her gear because gear isn't allowed here but she's dressed in her uniform.

"I hear you two even share a bedroom." A frustrated breath explodes from Eren's chest.

"Why does it sound like you're accusing me of something?" Mikasa shrugs nonchalantly.

"I'm not accusing you of anything." They fall to silence.

"I'm just saying it's weird." Eren growls in irritation.

"Would you just drop it already?" Mikasa sighs.

"Fine," she dully replies. Eren takes a deep, calming breath that expands his shoulders and releases it in one long rush. He turns to face Mikasa.

"I told you to meet me here because I wanted to ask you to join us on a mission."

"And by us you mean you and Levi." Eren shoots her an impatient look.

"Yeah."

"What kind of mission?" Eren explains to her of their intention to find Reiner and Bertholdt's home and in turn, hopefully find them.

"Why do you want to find them? They tried to kidnap you and almost succeeded."

"I have some questions I want to ask." Mikasa shakes her head.

"This is a suicidal mission. There's no way I'm letting you go."

"I'm not your younger brother! I'm going no matter what you say." Mikasa glares at him.

"It's dangerous. Even with a skilled fighter like Levi, you won't stand a chance if they decide they want to kill you."

"They won't do that. They're our friends." Mikasa snorts.

"You're too naïve, Eren." Even as she says this in a negative sense, that's a part of him that she loves—his naivety. "People betray each other in the end." Eren rises to his feet.

"Fine, don't come. We don't need you anyway." Eren's words hit Mikasa like lightning and she jolts from the shock. A life where Eren doesn't need her isn't a life she wants live. She needs Eren to need her.

"I'll go," she finally relents. Eren looks down at her and grins triumphantly.

"Thanks." He offers her his hand and she allows him to pull her to her feet. When he looks at her like that, how can she deny him anything?

* * *

When Eren returns to the room, Levi is already there. He's folding clothes and neatly packing them in the dresser drawers.

"I washed your clothes," he informs him. Eren almost laughs—the Lance Corporal doing his laundry? What, was he a housewife in a past life or something? Levi puts the last of his clothing away and turns to him.

"Did Mikasa agree to go?" Eren nods.

"Good. Now all we have to do is wait for word from Irvin. I'm going to bathe." Levi heads to the washroom.

"Maybe we should bathe together," Eren suggests. He's becoming more outspoken with the corporal now. Because they've been spending so much time together, he feels a bit more confident around him. "I could scrub your back for you."

"Tch, I'll pass," comes the immediate reply.

"But I could wash all the places you can't normally reach. You'll be two times cleaner with my help." Levi pauses in the doorway. He halfway turns to Eren with a thoughtful look.

"Twice as clean, you say?" Eren's heart rate quickens. Levi is actually considering his offer? He can't believe it. Suddenly he feels embarrassed. He hadn't been serious when he offered to bathe together, he'd been certain Levi would immediately turn him down.

"Er, yeah," Eren stammers, eyes plastered to his feet.

"Then what're you waiting for?" A small hesitant grin breaks across Eren's face and his heart pounds as he makes his way over to Levi. Levi waits, holding the door open for him with his distinctive pokerfaced expression. Eren is just about to step through when Levi slams the door shut in his face. It bangs against his forehead and leaves a bright red welt.

"Nice try, brat," comes Levi's voice from behind the locked door. Eren groans and rubs his head. Geez, he didn't have to go that far…

* * *

The following day Irvin arrives back at MP headquarters around midday. He has a splitting headache and he's in a foul mood but he sends for Levi anyway. He has no time to waste. Unsurprisingly, it doesn't take long for Levi to show. As usual he doesn't bother knocking and barges right in. Levi and Hanji are the only people who can do such a thing and get away with it. He automatically settles himself in the sofa chair and meets Irvin's eyes.

"Did the general give you his consent?"

"Not exactly," Irvin drawls out.

"Then what _did_ he give you?" Irvin holds up a hand to silence Levi's questions.

"First, let me ask you something." An inquisitive look passes over Levi's face and he leans back in his seat.

"What is it?" Irvin is quiet for a moment as he searches for the right words.

"Do you truly think yourself a pawn for me to freely use?" The question catches Levi off guard. He loses his tongue. Before he has a chance to reply, Irvin rises to his feet and goes to crouch in front of him. He is eye level with Levi and there is little space between their faces

"Are you going to answer?" Levi can't. The silence says more than any spoken word could anyway. Irvin's sole hand stretches toward Levi's face. His fingers brush over his cheekbone, his temple, and then cups the back of his head. He pulls his face closer and closer until his mouth is at Levi's ear.

"You're not a pawn," the commander says. A flashback of his conversation from the other day with Zacklay plays in the forefront his mind:

_"The corporal is not mine to give. I don't own him," Irvin had said, patience quickly thinning. _

_"No but he'll do whatever you ask of him." Irvin's nostrils had flared with a frustrated breath and he scowled at the general. _

_"Isn't there anything else you want?" Zacklay had shaken his head._

_"That is my offer." Irvin's jaw set._

_"Very well. I'll see what I can do."_

"Levi," and the sound of his name rolling off Irvin's tongue in such a sensual way makes the hair rise on the back of Levi's neck. "If I ordered you to give yourself to the general, what would you do?" Irvin's burly hand releases Levi's head and he tilts back to meet the corporal's eyes. At last Levi finds his voice.

"Give myself to him? What does that even mean?" Irvin's gaze is steady on him, gauging every reaction or lack of reaction that might pass over Levi's brow at his clarification.

"I mean to let him ravish you." Levi's entire body tenses and there's disbelief written in the tapering of his eyes.

"Why would you order me to do that?" he demands. Is that anger that Irvin detects? He hopes that it is.

"Because the director holds a deep admiration for you and he'll assent to the operation if I can give him what he desires most—and that's you." Disgust openly contorts Levi's face and his upper lip curls. A surreptitious smile pulls at the corners of Irvin's mouth. He's finally found the one thing Levi won't do for him. He's finally found a reason the corporal isn't just a pawn that does his bidding.

"If you ordered it, I'd do it." And his voice is low and controlled, giving nothing away of how he feels. The words don't register right away; a moment passes before he realizes what Levi actually said. Irvin's heart sinks.

"In that case, you know what to do." Levi makes a 'tsk' sound and his fingers dig into the leather arms of the seat.

"Say it right." Irvin clenches his teeth and has to force the words out his mouth. Just the thought of what he is about to say makes his stomach roil. But the words come out smooth and strong contrary to what he's feeling.

"I order you to lie with General Zacklay." At that, any expression Levi had been wearing drains away and he stares coldly at Irvin. The detachment is complete in every sense. It's clear that he didn't expect Irvin to actually follow through with the command.

"Fine." That one word is sharp and acts as a stake through Irvin's iron heart. Levi sidesteps Irvin's crouched form and storms out, slamming the door shut behind him. Why Levi? Why will he do anything that he asks? Even something as degrading as this… Does he have no self-respect? No, that's not it. The corporal is a proud man.

"Perhaps… you're actually in love with me." Irvin ponders the absurdity of it. Now another question arises. Does Irvin love the corporal back? Irvin already knows the answer. No, of course not, he's a heartless man. He does not love. He cannot love. Maybe if he repeats those thoughts in a mantra, until he can't think anything else can possibly be true, it'll become reality.

* * *

**Afterword: ****I'm sorry if you were expecting more skinship but I like for things to slowly progress. I think it's more believable and heartrending that way. Plus, the smaller things tend to make my heart race more, but that's just me. **


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note: I would like to thank you for reading my fanfic thus far. I was pleasantly surprised that people actually enjoyed it. You have no idea how many times I rewrote this chapter. Now it's just a big blur of meaningless words to me so I apologize for any mistakes beforehand. I'm so nervous about posting this chapter because I don't wanna disappoint anyone. It's full of angst. I can't seem to withhold it from my writing and I think I might've overdone it. Sigh. Oh well. ****  
**

**Here's the playlist I listened to while writing this chapter:**

**1. Game Freak [acoustic] by Ghost Town **

**2. Colors (Into Nothing) by Code Orange Kids**

**3. Figure 8 by Ellie Goulding **

**4. Shadows by Lindsey Stirling**

**5. 에코 (Echo) acoustic by Every Single Day (에브리 싱글 데이) **

**6. My Understandings by Of Mice & Men**

**7. She Doesn't Mind by Sean Paul**

**I also listened to the OST to SNK. I'm a music freak with a very broad taste and just thought I'd share my music with those who were interested. And if no one's interested, that's okay. **

* * *

Hot breath mingles as quiet sighs fill the silence. Heartbeats throb madly in the smooth, heated bodies that flow with fluid sync as the moonlight streaming in through the single window bathes their skin in a soft glow that wards off the shadows lurking around them.

"Eren…" comes a barely audible voice, just above a whisper. A head ducks lower and captures those lips in a soft kiss. Arms curl around Eren's neck and pull him close until every contour of their bodies is pressed flush together. Eren's hands run down the sides of the body pressed against him. He can feel the ridges of a ribcage and then the jut of hipbones. The kiss breaks and the body underneath Eren swells while taking in a shaky breath.

Eren's fingers play at the waistband of the slacks and slip inside. He's rewarded with a startled gasp and then the body writhes in pleasure beneath Eren. His name is moaned again. Eren's mouth leaves hot trails up an arched throat to a defined jaw and then he gently nibbles on a soft earlobe. There's another gasp.

"Shhh," he croons into the ear. "They'll hear you." Eren leans back to look at the face. The dark eyes that gaze back at him are clouded in lust and cheeks are flushed with heat. Eren's fingers tighten and those clouded eyes squeeze shut. His hands work slowly at first and then with more speed. Slender hips twitch further into Eren's grip and another moan escapes from deep inside.

"I've never seen such a look on your face…" A pause for another chaste kiss upon those delectable lips. "Captain." Levi's mouth is slightly ajar and heavy pants course through. Eren thinks he looks sweet like this—completely overwhelmed and breathless. And the fact that Eren is the one who made him this way fills Eren's chest with pride.

"Don't…patronize…me," he utters between gasps of air. Eren chuckles quietly.

"Sorry." Levi's fingers curl in the sheets and his muscles tense. He's close, so very close. Eren's hand moves with increased fervor and Levi sucks in a sharp breath.

"Eren!" he cries softly. A shiver works up Eren's spine. He loves the way Levi calls out his name with that hoarse voice.

"Levi…" he murmurs. "Mmmm."

"You mean Captain." Eren's eyes snap open and he's jolted into hard reality.

"Huh?" He's curled on the bed, hugging tightly onto a pillow. He rolls over to see Levi propped up against the headrest, fully clothed and reading some kind of report and most definitely not squirming underneath him in fiery passion.

"It's Captain. You've got a long way to go before you can address me by my first name."

"Oh, right…Sorry, Captain." Levi glances at him.

"What did you want? I thought you were sleeping." The blood rushes to Eren's face. Apparently he _had_ been fast asleep and was guilty of having a perverted dream about the very man sitting next to him.

"Uh, nothing…"

"Do you feel feverish? Your face is red." Levi reaches over to feel his forehead but Eren reels back. He can't let Levi see the state that he's in; he'd die of humiliation. Unfortunately he recoils too far and tumbles off the side of the bed, landing with a loud thump.

"Ow…"

"Damn kid, what the hell is wrong with you?" As he says this, he returns to reading the report in his hands, brushing off Eren's strange behavior and ignoring that he exists.

* * *

Armin meets up with Mikasa and Eren for the first time in days. He hasn't seen them since Eren's almost kidnapping. He doesn't know why Eren had insisted that they meet but it seemed urgent. Armin and Mikasa easily bypass the military police and slip unnoticed into the MP cafeteria. The sweet aromas of food, of all kinds of delicious entrees, cloak them and their mouths water as a physiological response. The Survey Corps cafeteria couldn't even compare to this.

They find Eren sitting at a lone bench. Levi isn't with him for some reason but Hanji is seated at his right, babbling nonstop. By the expression on Eren's face, Armin and Mikasa can tell that his ear is just about worn off. Hanji's boundless energy is exhausting him.

"Hey, Eren," Armin greets as they arrive at the table. Instantly Eren perks up and twirls around in his seat. A grin stretches from ear to ear and a sparkle lights up his green eyes.

"Armin! Mikasa! You're here!"

"You didn't think we'd show?" questions Mikasa with a frown. Eren shakes his head and then smiles warmly at her.

"That's not it. I'm just happy." A pink color dusts the apples of her cheeks and her eyes dart away. Eren doesn't notice. His attention shifts to Armin.

"I haven't seen you in a while, I'm glad you're here." Armin smiles in return and nods wholeheartedly.

"Me too."

"Well!" chimes in Hanji, clapping her hands together loudly. "It's been a nice chat, Eren. Let's do this again." A reluctant look flashes across Eren's face but Hanji either doesn't spot it or, more likely, ignores it. "I'll give you three some time to catch up." She winks at them and stands.

"Thank you Miss Hanji!" Armin says with a polite bow as she leaves. As soon as she disappears, Mikasa turns all business.

"So what's the mission's status? Did it pass legislation?" But before Eren answers, Armin cuts in.

"What mission?" He's still uninformed of everything that's been happening recently.

"Actually I wanted to talk to you about it, Armin. I want to hear what you think." Armin and Mikasa sit down and Eren explains their plan to him. When he's through, Armin is deep in thought.

"Hmm, I don't think it's a bad idea," he begins slowly. "Reiner and Bertholdt _will_ break through Wall Sina, it's only a question of when and I think they'll grow tired of waiting pretty quickly because there's Annie."

"That's right…" Eren murmurs thoughtfully.

"When I had mentioned Annie's name to Bertholdt at the time they'd captured you before, he went berserk. I think leaving Annie behind isn't an option for them. They'll break through Wall Sina if not to kidnap you, then to rescue Annie."

"I didn't even think about that," says Eren. "How is she anyway?" Armin's eyes fall and he bites his bottom lip.

"She's still crystallized. It's like she's suspended in time. Her body doesn't depreciate from a lack of food and water and it seems like nothing can break through to her."

"Armin's been visiting her daily," Mikasa informs Eren. Armin sighs.

"I just thought that maybe I'd be able to convince her to come out but it doesn't look like that's the case." Eren squeezes Armin's shoulder comfortingly and Armin looks up to meet his encouraging eyes.

"If anyone can get her to come out, it'll be you."

"He's right Armin, just keep trying," Mikasa agrees. Armin nods with a renewed determination. He would keep trying. Not for the sake of humanity but for Annie's own sake. To remain crystallized for the rest of eternity isn't a future befitting her. She may have killed lots of people and it might not make sense to other people but to Armin, she still isn't a bad person.

* * *

Hanji storms into Irvin's room. The door slams against the wall and rebounds from the aftershock. She marches straight up to him, hands balled in tight fists with a pointed black glare. Irvin isn't surprised that she knows; nothing goes overlooked by Hanji. She halts just in front of him and winds back an arm. Irvin's expression is blank as he waits for her to do it. He remains motionless as her hand comes across his face with as much force as she can muster. The crack of her palm against his cheek echoes in the silence. After it's through, they remain quiet for a few more moments as Hanji catches her breath.

"You're not heartless," she growls out breathlessly. Her chest rises and falls quickly with her short breaths.

"You would've moved out of the way if you were." Her arm falls to her side and both hands unclench. Irvin stares at her, entirely baffled. Instinctively he rubs his stinging cheek.

"What?" The glare that had been etched into her features melts. She tucks a stray hair behind her ear and straightens her posture, attempting to appear composed but her glassy eyes betray her. After clearing her throat she explains.

"You feel like you deserved that slap that's why you didn't move. You regret giving Levi that command." Irvin doesn't know what to say. How can this woman see through him so easily? She sniffles and crosses her arms over her small chest.

"Stop pretending like you don't care. I can see how you really feel about him." Irvin shakes his head and smiles bitterly.

"I'm afraid you're mistaken, Hanji. He's nothing but my pawn, right?" Hanji's eyes knowingly fix on his for a long time before she speaks again.

"I see how it is. You're hurt because he lives that way." _Dammit_, he can't pull anything over her keen eyes.

"But don't you realize that he only lives as your pawn because he loves you?" Irvin scowls.

"That's not love, it's duty." A short breath of frustration bursts from her.

"You're wise and fearless when dealing with war but right now, I see nothing but a frightened fool."

* * *

Zacklay is sitting on the couch reading Lance Corporal Rivaille's background. Everything that he learns about the corporal only intensifies his desire. His fingers smooth out the picture of a younger Rivaille. He supposes an impassive yet strangely appealing face is one of the traits Rivaille has always had. The door creaks open without a warning knock and the very object of his desires enters. He doesn't meet Zacklay's eyes as he presses his back against the door and quietly closes it.

"Lance Corporal Rivaille," General Zacklay drawls out, each syllable accentuated as its own. "Or should I call you Levi?"

Zacklay knew it'd be simpler for him to travel to the military police central headquarters than to have Levi come to the heart of the city. The encounter would be easier to keep under wraps this way too. He can conceal the true purpose for his presence under the impression that he's come to inspect the military. Inspections are rare but it's not as though they haven't been conducted before.

Levi says nothing so Zacklay continues without a hitch.

"I've heard much about you. They say you're humanity's finest soldier." Levi sighs dully.

"Let's cut the bullshit," he mutters. "Of all the people that you have at the tips of your grubby fingers, why choose me? I'm not an appealing person." Zacklay lets out a raspy chuckle.

"Not appealing? You _are_ rough around the edges—that's to be expected, you're a soldier after all, a fighter. But you're far from unappealing. In fact, many fantasize about you. The thought of conquering humanity's strongest soldier…it's a rather delicious dream, don't you agree? " Levi doesn't find any gratification from the thought.

"Hmph, that doesn't explain why _you_ personally want me." Zacklay's beady eyes shine with an adamant hunger, a look that chills Levi to the bone. He looks as though he will spring at Levi at any moment and devour him whole.

"To be honest, your performance at the court trial was most charming. I knew right then and there that I had to have you." A spasm ripples up the muscles of Levi's arms. He wants to rip the eyeballs right out of this disgusting pig's skull and shove them down his throat but he restrains himself.

"I could kill you," he says with chilling detachment. It's not a threat; it's a simple fact. Levi could easily murder this man—it'd be as quick as a blink and just as simple.

"But you won't." This man should fear him. Levi is a trained killer. But Zacklay is also frightening, however in another way. He might not be physically powerful but politically he could ruin Levi.

"You're right, I won't. But that doesn't mean you should take me lightly." There's a feral gleam in Levi's eyes and Zacklay smiles.

"Of course not. To underestimate you would be the equivalent of writing my own death sentence."

"Good, then we understand each other." Behind him, Levi flicks the lock so there is no risk of intrusion. He'd rather let titans consume him than have anyone see him in this humiliating position. A cruel smirk forms behind Zacklay's beard and his eyes turn predatory. Levi pushes away his thoughts and his heart becomes stone; he becomes nothing but an empty shell because this is the way he lives, he's fulfilling the role of a perfect pawn.

* * *

An uneasy feeling holes deep in Eren's gut. It grows until he can't ignore it anymore.

"Where's captain Levi?" he suddenly asks. Levi hadn't even checked on him once throughout the day. And when Eren woke up this morning, he had already gone. Never before has Levi disappeared on him like this. He's always made sure to tell Eren where he was going if he was leaving and then he always returned within a few hours. Eren is his responsibility so Levi can't leave him for long. Hanji blinks and then smiles reassuringly.

She'd been with him since Armin and Mikasa left earlier and that only made Levi's absence more prominent. They are in the room that Levi and Eren share now, just sitting around and Eren isn't the type of person to sit around and do nothing. He's becoming restless. As for Hanji, she's strangely quiet and the atmosphere is off.

"He'll be back soon. He's just doing something for Irvin." Eren's not the most observant person but that troubled look that had flashed behind her eyes didn't go unnoticed. He leaps off the bed and heads to the door. Something definitely isn't right, especially if Hanji is keeping something from him.

"Wait, where're you going?"

"To find him." As the door falls shut, he can hear Hanji call after him but he ignores her. He takes off in a run. He has no clue where to start searching for Levi but his feet seem to know where to take him. Soon he's standing outside Commander Irvin's door. He knocks once and there's a low 'come in' from inside. Eren opens it to find Irvin settled at a desk, rummaging through stacks of papers.

"Eren," he says in surprise. "What brings you here?"

"I'm looking for the corporal." The commander's eyes fall to his papers as if he's avoiding Eren's gaze. The anxious feeling in his gut grows.

"He's doing something for me. I thought Hanji was supposed to be watching you."

"Tch, I don't need a babysitter! I just want to know where the captain is, I have a bad feeling for some reason." Irvin waves his hand in dismissal.

"He'll be back by morning, you should return to your room and try to relax." Eren hisses in frustration through clenched teeth.

Fine, if Irvin isn't going to tell him where Levi is, he'll resort to his own method of finding him. He abruptly leaves with a halfhearted salute and hurries outside. He knows that what he's about to do will have serious consequences. He will agonize through grave punishments. But it's the quickest way Eren will be able to locate Levi and in this case, Levi will be the one to come to him. Cautiously he scans the area. Nobody is nearby. He brings his hand to his mouth and takes another second to think it over. His mind doesn't change. With steadfast resolve he opens his mouth and bites down.

* * *

A low roar wakes Levi. He tries to sit up only to realize that an arm around his bare torso constricts him to the bed and parts of his body ache that he didn't know could ache. There's another deep rumbling growl in the distance and Levi instantly recognizes it.

"Eren."

Levi removes the grip around him without disturbing Zacklay then rolls out of the bed with a wince. Ignoring the discomfort, he sloppily pulls on his pants and shirt. He doesn't even button it all the way before he's out the door. He heads down the hall and pushes through the double doors. The cool night breeze gently rustles his hair and soothes his especially warm skin. Where is that goddamn brat? He heads in the direction he thinks the sound had come from and sees the towering form of Eren's titan against the black sky.

Already beams of light point at him and a squad of soldiers surround him, taking disgraceful hacks at his titan flesh. Eren is trying his best to protect himself by holding his forearms defensively in front of his face. One soldier somehow manages to get to his neck but before he can cut Eren out, he grabs the man and sets him back on the ground. His other hand flies to cover his neck so the other soldiers can't get to it, not that they could anyway, they're pathetic with the maneuvering gear.

"Oh! How beautiful!" sings Doctor in pure delight. "Never have my eyes set upon such a magnificent being!" He stands close to Eren's foot, stretched up to his tiptoes with that disturbing wide grin spitting his face.

"I knew he was a traitor all along!" a soldier yells.

"He's nothing but a monster!" screams another.

But Levi watches more closely. Eren isn't attacking. He hasn't harmed anyone. He's just standing there, taking all of their blows without delivering any of his own. Levi reaches them. Doctor's eyes glint with anticipation at Levi's arrival and he steps back to give him space.

"Yo brat, what the fuck are you doing?" He doesn't speak very loudly. He doesn't need to. He knows Eren will hear him. Just as he expected, his voice reaches Eren and the titan glares down at Levi. The giant hand that isn't busy protecting his neck comes at him. The other soldiers cry out for him to move out of the way but Levi stubbornly holds his ground. The hand stops just at his feet. Without hesitation, Levi steps into the palm and Eren lifts him to his face.

"What the hell are you thinking? What's the reason for this?"

A sound rumbles within Eren's throat and then a gust of steam blows at Levi, sending his clothes fluttering about his limbs. The deterioration of the titan carcass initiates and Eren emerges from the nape of the titan's neck, struggling to free himself of the constraining fibers and flesh that's fused to him. Levi helps pull him free and they descend the titan body before it disintegrates. Eren is weak and collapses the instant they've made it to ground level. In the background, Doctor and a few MP examine the quickly deteriorating body, fascinated by it. Levi and Eren are in their own world amongst the chaos as Levi stoops beside him.

"What happened?" he demands.

Between pants Eren meets Levi's murderous glower and replies, "I couldn't find you, I was worried."

Levi just looks at him without saying anything. Eren is too tired to feel any embarrassment and flings himself at Levi. He captures the stunned corporal in an embrace and buries his face into his chest. Maybe it's the utter exhaustion or maybe it's the titan fumes but Eren is suddenly a jumbled mess of frayed emotions and tears.

"Don't disappear without telling me." _You're always supposed to be with me, aren't you?_

He unleashes a sigh and closes his eyes against Levi's chest. His heart aches. Being this close to Levi, he's noticed a few things: the hair at his hairline is stringy with dried sweat; his clothes are rumpled and even his shirt isn't buttoned completely; and there's a foreign scent coming from him. The stench isn't unpleasant, it might be the traces of some kind of aftershave but it's not Levi's own personal scent, which means he'd been with someone else on this night, and he'd been close enough for the smell to cling to his skin.

Eren doesn't like this. He doesn't want to know whom Levi had been with and he really doesn't want to know why Levi looks so utterly spent in every sense. What he wants is to stay like this, his arms around Levi, and keep him close. But it doesn't last, it can't. Levi hadn't returned the affectionate gesture but he hadn't pulled away either. Not until now did he attempt to unravel Eren's arms from around his midsection. Eren tightens his grip and Levi's chest lurches with a pained hiss through his teeth.

"Eren—"

"—Just a little longer…please." There's no reply but Levi remains still. Eren's eyes close and he listens to the hypnotizing thrum of Levi's steady heartbeat. He's not sure how much time has passed before he realizes that the military police he'd been fending off earlier are cautiously watching in a ring around them. Heat rises to Eren's head and he quickly breaks apart from Levi.

"S-sorry," he stammers. Levi is oddly quiet through the whole ordeal. He hasn't even reprimanded Eren the way he normally would. Maybe he's too tired or maybe Eren has disappointed him beyond words. Eren grows uncomfortable and Levi's silence isn't helping.

"Um, your shirt is unbuttoned," Eren says in a lame attempt to ease the awkwardness. The corporal's gray eyes are unfocused and his head is tilted down. He doesn't seem to have heard him.

Eren reaches out toward Levi's face and his curled finger hovers just under his chin. But instead of tucking it under Levi's jaw to tilt his face upward the way he wants to, his hands fall to Levi's shirt and he pulls the buttons together. Eren's hands work slowly and his fingertips brush his skin. Unexpectedly, Levi's fingers fold around Eren's and stop him from finishing. Eren looks at him inquisitively but Levi's face is downcast and shadowed.

"Captain?" Levi's head hangs a bit lower. That's when Eren realizes that Levi's grip is abnormally feeble as if he has no strength left. There's even the slightest tremble in his hands.

"What's—"

"My, you've caused quite the commotion." Immediately, Levi drops Eren's fingers. They both look up to see commander Irvin standing over them.

"I didn't think you'd go as far as abusing your titan power to draw out Levi. That was a thoughtless and incredibly dangerous stunt." Irvin's tone is composed and fierce at the same time and slightly condescending. Eren glares at him. Anger bubbles up inside him but he doesn't know why he's angry with Irvin. He doesn't have any reason to be.

"If you would've just told me where he was from the start, everything would've been a lot easier for you, Commander." Eren doesn't care that he's being disrespectful to his superior. Right now, he's unreasonably pissed off and can't control it. Irvin doesn't even blink an eye at the insolent tone he's using.

"Where I was doesn't concern you," Levi interjects, finally meeting Eren's eyes. They're weary and worn.

"What do you mean it doesn't concern me? You're supposed to keep watch over me." Irvin cuts in.

"Weren't you the one who said you didn't need a babysitter?" Eren jumps to his feet, his hands clenched into tight fists.

"Shut up! I wasn't talking to you!"

"Eren!" Levi snaps. He tries to stand but his knees give and he stumbles. Both Eren and Irvin make to grab for him but he brushes their hands away. Again he struggles to his feet and this time succeeds but not without appearing exhausted. He glares up at Eren.

"Know your place," he growls. "Respect your superiors." Eren knows that Levi had intended to sound stern but it came off as weak. Still, Eren gets the message and he sighs.

"Yes sir." Reluctantly he faces Irvin. "I'm sorry for my disrespect, Commander."

"I accept your apology." But Irvin isn't looking at Eren; his eyes are on the back of Levi's head and his mouth is pressed into a tight line with concern. Eren is also worried; the corporal doesn't look like himself.

"You should get some rest, Levi. You look like you're about to collapse," Irvin says. Levi laughs blackly.

"Is that an order?" Levi turns to face him and Eren wishes that he could see the look on his face. A wince flashes across Irvin's brow as if Levi has dealt him a physical blow. He looks like he wants to say something but he suppresses whatever he's thinking.

"Of course it isn't," he finally replies. Eren doesn't know what they're talking about but he can tell that something happened between the two. Levi looks over his shoulder at Eren.

"Don't think you're getting off scot-free. Tomorrow you'll be thoroughly punished." Eren gulps down the sour taste in his mouth. He's been expecting this but it didn't mean he isn't dreading it.

"Yes sir." Levi walks away with Eren and Irvin's eyes trailing after him.

"I'm impressed that he can move normally," Irvin says, his gaze still lingering on Levi's retreating back.

"Huh?" Irvin shakes his head.

"Just thinking aloud." And then he too leaves. Eren stays for a moment longer. His energy still hasn't recovered from his transformation and he needs more time to catch his breath. The MPs have thinned out and Doctor is preoccupied with writing down the episode in a journal; in a way everything is calm again, that is, except for the ever-growing ache in Eren's heart.

"Go after him." Eren jumps at the unexpected voice. It's Hanji. Where did she come from? And why is she smiling like that?

"What?" Hanji has her hands on her hips as she chuckles.

"Young boys in love are adorable." Eren blushes bright red.

"What are you talking about?" Hanji throws her head back with a boisterous laugh then cuts short and puts a forefinger to her lips

"Don't worry, your secret's safe with me." She winks and Eren shifts uncomfortably. Suddenly she shoves him, making him stagger forward.

"Go! He needs you!" He hesitates and looks at Hanji one last time. Who the hell was she talking about? Who needs him? She cocks an eyebrow and then Eren knows. He takes off in a full sprint. Hanji shakes her head with a grin.

"Geez… what am I going to do with these fools."

* * *

When Eren enters their bedroom, the air around him is humid and warm. The bathroom door is cracked open and tufts of steam leak from inside. Tentatively, Eren pulls the door open wider and heat and steam rush at him. Through the vapor, he makes out a silhouette in the bath.

"Captain?" he calls out. There's no reply. Slowly Eren makes his way to the side of the bath. He's not sure how Levi will react to him intruding like this but once he's knelt beside the bath, the corporal doesn't react to his presence. His eyes are straightforward and clouded over and he's immersed to his shoulders in water. The air is so hot that sweat forms at Eren's hairline. He wonders how Levi can stand the extreme temperature. That's when he notices that Levi's skin is inflamed. Eren dips his fingers into the water and quickly recoils. It's scalding hot.

"Captain, the water is way too hot! You'll pass out if you stay in there!" Levi remains unresponsive.

"Captain!" Eren urges again. He takes hold of Levi's arm and pulls it out of the water. His eyes widen at the sight of dark bruises on Levi's wrist.

"What the…?" Eren's eyes follow the length of Levi's arms to his shoulders and finally land on his back where several sets of angry scratch marks streak his skin. Where did he get those marks? Eren pulls his arm again with more force.

"Please Captain. It's not healthy."

No matter how many times Eren calls, no matter how hard Eren tugs his arm, Levi doesn't move. Out of frustration, Eren growls and clutches the back of Levi's head. He glares at those blank eyes for a moment and as a last desperate resort mashes his mouth hard over Levi's. Nothing happens for a moment. Another moment passes and then suddenly Levi flinches. A fist pounds Eren's temple and he's sent sprawling backward.

Levi wipes his mouth on the back of his knuckles and a long string of curses is spat Eren's way. Eren kneads his throbbing head and pressure builds up in his chest. A fit of crazed relieved laughter breaks free and he topples over, gripping hard onto his stomach. He's never been so happy to be hit. Levi's cursing stops and he watches Eren in silence. The lack of expression hasn't changed but at least Levi's eyes have regained their focus.

"You really do need to get out of there. I'll get your clothes," Eren says once his laughing fit fades. He leaves to retrieve Levi's nightclothes and when he returns, he's already out and bundled in a towel. He hands them over and Levi meets his eye.

"You're an idiot for what you did. Do that again and I'll kill you, got it?" Eren nods.

"Yes sir." Levi snatches the clothes and Eren gives him privacy to change. Although Levi had called him an idiot, anger was missing from his tone and there was a drop of warmth there.

Not until after Eren is already lying in bed, thoughts fading into a haze, did he realize that Levi hadn't been clear on what he'd been referring to. He'd been talking about the titan incident, right? And not the kiss? Does that mean Eren can kiss him again without fearing for his life…? He'd like to be able to try but he's far too nervous to even consider asking.


	4. Chapter 4: Levi's Encounter (WARNING)

**Author's note: WARNING THIS CHAPTER ISN'T FOR THE LIGHT OF HEART.  
**

**For those who were curious, I hope this will satisfy your cravings. As for those who don't care to read about what happened between Levi and Zacklay, go ahead and skip this chapter.   
Don't feel like you have to read it.  
**

**I spent extra time writing the next chapter so I could upload both chapters at the same time just for those people. I wanted to be fair and have something for them to read too. **

**But I bet those people will read this chapter anyway. Curiosity is killer.**

**And I'm terribly sorry for making people review in order to get this chapter posted. I feel really bad about that. No one should feel obligated to review anyone's writing. It's a choice. **

**I also changed the Rating due to this chapter. **

* * *

**Playlist for this chapter:**

**1. Apology (Remix) by Alesana**

**2. Breath by Breaking Benjamin **

**3. Hear Me Now by Framing Hanley**

**4. Built for Sin by Framing Hanley**

**Listening to Framing Hanley again was nostalgic, so many memories came back to me. I miss them, they were such a GOOD band. If you don't know them, I highly recommend checking them out.  
**

* * *

"Corporal Rivaille, you're not one for dillydallying, I see." And the voice is taunting and patronizing, a reflection of the unkind smile that contorts his aged face.

"You really will do anything for that man." Behind the lenses of his glasses, his eager beady eyes rove over Levi, carefully, deliberately, as if imagining all the sweet sins he will commit to each piece of him. Levi's pulse quickens in his veins. He's not afraid. Fear isn't the reason why his blood runs faster, it's utter disgust.

Zacklay reaches out to Levi with his bulky hand and cups his cheek; it's rough and uncomfortable against his skin and his other hand is at the small of his back, pulling him close.

"Even this. How…" A snicker. "…pitiful." _Fuck you_. Flaring desire dilates Zacklay's pupils and carefully his head bends low. Levi's eyes slit. Thick lips come at Levi's face but before they're close enough to touch, Levi roughly catches Zacklay's chin. His grip is tight, so tight that his nails dig into the flesh of his jaw at the verge of breaking skin.

"Let's get something straight," he spits. "You _will not _kiss me, understand?" A flash of irritation etches into Zacklay's brow.

"Do you realize the position you're in? Denying me is failing your commander." Levi's fingers dig in deeper and he jerks the bastard's face closer, eyes narrow and unwavering.

"No kissing," he deadpans and then he thrusts the face away from him, sending Zacklay stumbling backward. He rubs his jaw with an indignant grunt.

Levi continues on with his arms crossed defiantly over his chest, "What's going to happen is this," he gestures toward Zacklay, "you'll fuck me" and he says it simply with a detachment so complete it's as if he doesn't grasp the weight of his own words, then he gestures to himself, "And then I'll leave. And tomorrow, when you announce your consent, I will have already forgotten everything about this nightmare." Zacklay is silent for a moment, taken off guard by Levi's nerve. But really, he shouldn't have expected anything less.

"Your mind may forget but I will make sure your body doesn't."

Levi's face is a blank as he coolly replies, "Do what you want." An ominous uneven smile stretches across Zacklay's face.

"Anything?" He blocks Levi against the wall. Maybe his wording hadn't been accurate. Levi won't actually let this bastard do _anything_ to him. He won't hesitate to put him in his place if it comes down to it. A mouth is at his ear and musty breath glances the side of his face.

"Shed your clothes." The tremors that build in Levi's spine are hard to suppress but somehow he manages. Without the slightest bit of indecision or shame, he swiftly rids himself of his clothing and drops them to the floor in a pile at his feet. The faster they get started, the sooner it will be over with. Zacklay regards him with a penetrating stare and Levi counters with a blackened scowl.

"That hateful look is becoming of you," Zacklay croons. "Now, remove my jacket."

"Tch!" Levi pushes against Zacklay but he clutches both his wrists in a single hand and holds them firmly.

"And do it kindly," he adds sharply. Levi's nostrils flare with a short, vexed breath but his movements become less harsh as he peels the jacket off Zacklay's shoulders. The man is tall and wide so he has to stretch onto the tips of his toes and their chests mash against one another. Once the jacket is in Levi's hands, Zacklay takes it and neatly hangs it on a coat hanger, carefully smoothing out the wrinkles with slight pats.

"He doesn't care about you, you know," he suddenly says, spinning on his heel to face Levi once more.

"You act as if I have a clue what you're blabbering about."

"I think you know exactly whom I speak of."

There's a snide gleam in his small eyes. Zacklay presses himself close and instinctively Levi reels back a step, accidentally knocking into the wall. Prickly bearded lips press into his neck just below his jaw and fingertips run along his spine. Levi doesn't succeed in ignoring his shiver this time.

He's steered to the too large expanse of a bed in the center of the room and the bulky hands that are on him, guide his body down into the mattress. The lavish material is soft against Levi's back and he sinks into the padding.

"Humanity's greatest soldier is but a puppet for him to use on a whim." The hands roving his body pause for a moment and Zacklay's piercing eyes hover over Levi's blank stare.

"I'm curious as to why that is." There is nothing in Levi's expression to aid Zacklay in uncovering the truth. But Zacklay isn't blind. The answer is simple. There's really only one reason a person would be willing to do absolutely anything to please another. He doesn't say it aloud though. Zacklay doesn't want to say something like that out loud because even he isn't immune to the sting of jealousy.

"You give your entire self to him but he gives nothing in return—not even his heart," Zacklay murmurs into the hollow of Levi's collarbone. His breath blisters the skin there.

Any sensible person would surely realize that acting as someone else's puppet out of some kind of twisted perception of love is self-destruction, Levi will gain nothing but the burden of his own corroding heart. Zacklay almost pities him, _almost._ How far will the Lance Corporal bend until he breaks? Zacklay will gladly test those limits and find out.

"How does it feel to be used and thrown out like trash?"

An unbearable pressure builds in Levi's chest and the sound of his own rushing blood is deafening in his ears as his heart hammers painfully against his ribcage. What is this feeling? It's not fear and it's not anger. It's an unfamiliar feeling and it's painful.

"He didn't show a moment's hesitation to sell you out, Lance Corporal. Does it hurt you to know that he doesn't care?"

Is that why? Is this the reason for the agonizing pressure inside Levi's chest? Levi knows well that Irvin will sacrifice lives and trust for a possible step toward the revival of humanity's honor. Levi is no exception to this. General Zacklay should empathize Irvin's choice; they're both the same in that way. Why is Zacklay taunting him then? And why won't this pressure ease?

"Have you nothing to say?" Levi scoffs, his expression just as cold and merciless as Zacklay's words.

"No, you keep spewing nonsense. How am I supposed to keep up conversation with an idiot?" Zacklay chuckles and the back of his hand runs the length of Levi's cheekbone almost lovingly. For a sick bastard, his touch is gentle. It's revolting.

"For a moment, I thought you'd been affected by my words. I'm relieved your imprudence hasn't been lost." Levi blinks.

"You're not that fortunate."

Thick dry lips meet his throat for a moment and then widen over the expanse of his neck. His mouth moves slowly, relishing each taste of Levi's salty-sweet skin that tinges his tongue. Levi turns his head to the side and with much effort, forces his breath steady. He grimaces and shuts his eyes. The hairs on his arm stand on end.

Being in such a position isn't natural. It goes against every bit of Levi's essence that piece him together. His blood boils, his head buzzes, his muscles seize— he wants so much to senselessly beat into this bastard. He wants to feel the utmost pleasure of having his knuckles continuously crunch against his skull until it fissures and ruptures and brain matter spouts from his ears, until his own hands ache and blood stains them crimson. He won't be satisfied until it does. Zacklay's grating voice distracts him from his internal struggle.

"You're being quite submissive. This isn't how I imagined you'd be." If only Zacklay knew the real thoughts going through Levi's mind, he wouldn't be saying that.

"Don't overestimate my self-restraint," Levi warns forebodingly. The corner of Zacklay's mouth twitches.

"Is that a threat?" Levi tries to shrug but he's trapped by the weight on top of him.

"Call it what you want."

"Hmm…" At one moment Zacklay is close to Levi, looming over him, and then in the next moment he's not. Levi starts to sit up but Zacklay's heavy palm settles against his chest and keeps him still. With his other hand he slips off his glasses and perches them on the bedside table.

When he turns his face to look at Levi, something has changed in his expression. He doesn't look like the same man that only a moment ago, caressed him so tenderly. His eyes are animalistic and the side of his mouth is pulled up in an unrestrained sneer. That diplomacy he's always fronting has vanished.

"Don't overestimate _my_ self-restraint. I will break you." There's a small part of Levi that's disturbed by that look and there's another, more prominent part, that's just irritated.

"You can try," he replies with a challenging bite. How arrogant to think he can break him. Levi isn't a person that's easily damaged.

Zacklay's chest rumbles with a guttural laugh and then suddenly his hand shoots out and clutches onto Levi's wrist. The arm is limp in his grasp as he lifts it high and at an awkward twist behind Levi's head. Something metal is locked around it and binds him to the bedpost above them. Levi didn't even notice the manacle in his possession.

"Goddamn pervert," he mutters dully. He should have expected something like this. Not that it matters, he'd told him that he could do whatever he wanted so Levi isn't going to protest. It's too late to take back now.

"Binding me is pointless." Zacklay holds himself squarely over Levi, hands spread out on either sides of him, and tilts close. His large frame fully swallows Levi's smaller one.

"But you're even more appealing this way. Humanity's greatest soldier, bound and helpless beneath my body." _Helpless? _Levi is _far_ from helpless. One incapacitated hand doesn't change anything; he can still kill this man.

"Hah." He doesn't give a damn what Zacklay does to him. It doesn't matter because he has no doubt in his ability to endure all of it; in fact, he _wants_ to see what Zacklay has in store just to witness all of his useless methods ultimately fail.

"I want to see your suffering face," he whispers hotly. "I want to feel your body writhe beneath me as I take you."

He palms Levi's thighs from underneath and bangs his knees to his chest. A small groan rises in the back of his throat but he doesn't dare let it past his lips. Zacklay slips between his legs and teasingly prods at him.

"Will you think of someone else as I take you?" he asks. What kind of question is that? These head games are irritating.

"Shut up and just do it already." Levi's body shakes along with Zacklay's quaking chuckles.

"Patience, Corporal, patience." Something cold and wet is applied to his skin.

"You're not suitably prepared. I don't want to _permanently_ damage you, only temporarily." After all, Levi has to be able to fight without hindrance.

"Tch, how considerate of you." His muscles grow rigid at the strange sensation and he shudders as a physiological response. Zacklay hums in satisfaction and realigns himself between Levi.

"Perhaps you'll imagine _that man_ is taking you instead of me," he muses. The jeering gleam in his eye makes Levi's blood simmer. He wants to grab those lips and rip them right off his face so he can't utter another word. But silence and a glare is his only response.

Maybe… just maybe imagining it is Irvin _will_ act as a small comfort in this hellish night. Desperately he tries to picture his face but for some reason he can't. He can't remember what his face looks like. He can't remember his voice either. Of all the times he's tried to push the commander out of his thoughts, why now can't he see him?

Zacklay drives forward. Levi's entire body stiffens and he holds his breath. But the movements are slow and careful, not at all what Levi had been expecting. Was Zacklay actually trying _not_ to hurt him? Levi's head lifts off the bed and he peers inquisitively at the bastard. Zacklay's face is concentrated, his thick silver eyebrows creased and his mouth pulled down.

When he meets Levi's eyes he murmurs, "Relax Levi," and eases forward.

It's hot and rough and it burns as he's cleaved apart. His chest heaves with his rapid breathing. Loosening up has proved impossible; his body just won't become comfortable. Low grunts follow each movement Zacklay makes. His gaze shifts to Levi's face and he lowers himself until they're parallel to one another.

Rugged fingers roam over Levi, fondling him in all the sensitive areas. The tick of his heart stirs and blood runs quick to different parts of him. It's all just a physiological response. He can't control his body's reaction to the methodical strokes.

"You're enjoying this," the bastard taunts. Levi's toes curl and he grows tenser as he futilely tries to resist the induced false sense of pleasure that's quickly strangling him. The pace of which Zacklay moves abruptly changes and Levi isn't ready. He swallows the hiss behind his teeth, biting hard onto his lip. His sharp incisors break through the skin and the rusty taste of blood dribbles into his mouth.

"Tell me, what does humanity's strongest fighter fear? Does he fear anything at all?" Levi doesn't answer. He couldn't even if he wanted to. He's afraid if he opens his mouth, he'll accidentally unveil his lowly state.

"Do you fear losing him? Is that your deepest fear?" Levi's eyes snap open and he glares. He bites back the trill in his voice and this time struggles to choke out an even reply.

"You're wrong." He breaks for breath. "I'm prepared to lose him at the expense of humanity at any time." He tries to snub the small voice in his head that knows he's lying. The day he'd cried for Irvin was the day he realized his true weakness.

Zacklay whispers into his ear, "Are you certain?" Levi doesn't say anything more.

Levi's legs are bent over Zacklay's boxy arms while his own shoulder blades painfully grind into the headboard behind him; the rest of him is compressed together between the two until his backbone arcs from the pressure at an unnatural angle. He twists and turns and his joints are on the verge of splintering at each movement. With every pull and jerk, more flesh of his wrist chafes away against the metal binding him. But he doesn't admit that it hurts, not even to himself.

"You will _fall_," that ugly voice rasps on. Levi can hear the frustration teeming just below threshold. Levi doesn't want to know what will happen once it brims over.

Zacklay's confidence is wavering and Levi knows it. Contrary to what he said, Zacklay has indeed underestimated him. Zacklay thought Levi would give up by now but he appears just as sound and composed as when they started. Why isn't he reacting? Why isn't he screaming out?

"Cry for me," Zacklay demands. "I want to hear your voice."

His large hands grope at Levi's back for more leverage and he pulls their bodies together hard. Bits of flesh off Levi's back are scraped away underneath Zacklay's fingernails. But that pain doesn't register instead he gasps aloud at the overwhelming sensation of something inside him flaring. He's never felt something like this before and has to resist the impulse to order Zacklay to stop.

"You felt that didn't you?" but the words are smothered by the heat and blood flow to Levi's head. He squeezes his eyes shut and gnaws on the open crack on his lip.

An arm coils around Levi's neck and a large index finger slips into his grating mouth. He gags and chokes and saliva strings down his chin. He bites down and Zacklay unleashes a startled cry. He withdrawals his finger from out of his mouth and brings it close to his face to inspect the damage.

"You bit me." He seems stunned by this realization. He grinds his teeth together and smiles unkindly. Levi is in for it now.

It hurts and it's a strange type of pain—his insides burning. He thinks he'll tear in half. He doesn't know which is worse, being caressed with stomach-churning tenderness or being brutally ripped apart from the inside out. And the single sensation he felt before, he doesn't feel again and he's not sure whether he's grateful or disappointed.

Zacklay is ruthless. The bed shudders with their momentum and Levi wonders if it can withstand much more. He wonders how much more _he'll_ be able to withstand. Zacklay's tapered eyes observe him closely as he slams himself forward. Levi jerks and he clatters against the wall.

But it isn't gratifying because Levi doesn't respond. Not once does he break character. Not once is a sound made. Levi is steadfast and Zacklay's fuse is burning out. He doesn't have much left in him.

"Your strength will fail you," he wheezes out through grit teeth. Levi doesn't reply. He's stopped replying to his taunts a while ago and his eyes have clouded over. Zacklay growls in irritation and musters all the rest of his strength and releases it all in one go. No reaction.

Levi's mind is wandering. It's drifted away with images that don't make much sense. He sees the faces of those brats that always admire him like he's some kind of hero. He sees his old squad fighting at his side. He sees Petra smiling shyly at him when she doesn't think he can see her. He sees that deviant woman, Hanji, and her captured titans.

He sees countless more titans and waves of titan gore; squads of faceless soldiers and piles of nameless corpses; mounds of bloodstained soil and sad broken towns. Lastly he sees Irvin. He's younger. He looks more as he did when they first met, maybe even younger than that. But something's wrong. His eyes—they're not their distinctive steel blue color. They're green and intense and familiar. But…who has green eyes? He tries hard to remember but before he can, he's brought back into reality.

Abruptly, everything has stilled and Zacklay falls against Levi's chest. He's breathing hard and his skin is slick with sweat. His chest cavity vibrates with thin laughter and when it dies, he's left panting. Levi realizes that Zacklay has tired out; his stamina is spent. This gamble that he's started is finally over and Levi has won but there is no feeling of triumph, there's no feeling at all. He's empty, and it's a haunting type of emptiness.

Zacklay struggles to raise his head to meet Levi's unwavering dull eyes and his words come out breathless and defeated:

"You are the true meaning of obstinate."

* * *

**Afterword: Hope I didn't churn your stomach too much there. I actually debated on whether or not to post this chapter at all. I'm probably better off not posting it but I did anyway since I said that I would if people wanted it... and people wanted it... I definitely won't be surprised if people hate me for writing something so horrible. But hey, at least it shows how freaking strong and unbreakable Levi is.  
**


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's note: Geez, I felt like I just wrote a bunch of fluff nonsense for this chapter. It's probably boring to read and I apologize. The next chapter will be better since I already know what I want to write...well maybe. This time I made it up as I went. I hope it's not too horrible. **

**Thank you for reading! Even if you don't enjoy it, I'm thankful you gave my writing a chance (^~^)**

**And thank God September is over. Really the _worst_ month that exists. **

* * *

**Playlist for this Chapter:  
**

**1. We are Life by Emarosa **

**2. Cross My Heart (Acoustic) by Marianas Trench**

**3. When You Can't Sleep at Night by Of Mice & Men **

**4. Safe and Sound (Cover) by Tiffany Alvord & Megan Nicole  
**

**5. Oblivion by M83**

**6. Bittersweet by Ellie Goulding  
**

**7. Alone in This Bed (Capeside) by Framing Hanley **

**I swear, no matter how many times I listen to When You Can't Sleep at Night, I'll never tire of it. When I first added the song to my iPod I listened to it on replay and I STILL have days where I listen to it on reply. **

* * *

Eren sits across from Levi. It's morning and they're in the cafeteria picking at bread rolls. Actually, Eren is the one picking; Levi is merely sitting there, chin propped in his palm, his eyes glazed over. For a long time, Eren stares at him. He takes in the dark circles that cut shrunken trenches under his sharp eyes, the defined curvature of his jaw, and finally, his eyes settle on Levi's mouth. Those lips draw in Eren. They're not especially attractive, they're simple and small and a little dry but they're the corporal's lips. He can hardly believe he really kissed those lips. It'd been a moment so fleeting and he'd been so worked up that now, he can't remember what it'd felt like.

"Captain, are you sure you don't want to rest a bit more?" The only part of Levi that moves is his eyes, which flick in his direction.

"I already told you, I'm fully rested." _Liar._ He had hardly made it out of bed without toppling over.

"Stop trying to dodge your punishment," he adds.

"I'm not!" Eren protests. "I'm just worried about you!"

"Worry about yourself. I told you the military police didn't trust you before. And because of your stupid stunt last night, now they _really_ don't trust you." Eren doesn't say anything. Whether the military police believes in him or not doesn't matter so much anymore. Finding Levi was worth all the risks he had taken.

"It wouldn't surprise me if they're up your ass all day." Eren snorts and grumpily rips off the end of his bread between his teeth.

"Hmph."

As punishment Eren has to clean the entire MP HQ. He has to scrub each and every hallway until the tiles shine, wipe down the arches and columns, dust tables and cabinets, and go through every dorm room, picking up and discarding trash and whatever else he might find. He'd rather have a physical punishment like running for seven hours nonstop or having to do hundreds of pushups and sit-ups or even being denied his meals for an entire day—this is much worse than any of that.

He's been on the floor, washing tiles with a measly soft-bristled brush for four hours straight and his knees ache and his back is stiff and he's only cleaned one hallway and half another one at this point. He groans and wipes his forehead on the back of his wrist. At this rate, he'll never finish.

Two MPs are chatting at the end of the hall. Originally they had been posted there to keep an eye on Eren and conducted their task in silence but they quickly grew bored. Their voices are irritatingly loud and Eren can't possible ignore them so he lets himself listen mid-conversation as he continues to half-heartedly scrub at the tile.

"—one of those pervert clergymen. It couldn't have been her."

"I'm not saying it was. I was just saying I wouldn't be surprised if it had been Hitch; she's a freak. And from what I heard, the sound of them banging against the wall was so loud that the squads two whole halls down heard them."

"I don't think a woman could handle shit like that."

"And you think a man could?" Eren's movements slow as he listens more closely.

"Man, being a general must be the dream-life. They don't do shit and get to call all the shots."

"And they get good fucks even when they're too old to _be_ fucking." There's a silence.

"Who's your second guess?"

"I don't know. What about that psycho scientist woman who's staying here?"

"The one obsessed with catching and keeping titans?" Eren's brows crease and he strains to hear more. Are they talking about Hanji?

"Yeah." They both burst into laughter.

"Good one."

"Whoever it really is, is probably too sore to walk right." Then suddenly something the commander had said the previous night is brought to the front of Eren's mind:

_I'm impressed that he can move normally._

"What?" he thinks out loud. "Why am I remembering that now? That can't be what he meant."

"That can't be what who meant?" Eren is startled and drops the brush he'd been holding. He looks up and sees Levi standing over him with his arms crossed.

"Captain…" Eren's eyes divert away. He's ashamed for thinking something so vile about him. The corporal would never do something like that…right? He had a reputation to uphold.

"It's nothing." As he examines Eren's progress, Levi's face darkens considerably.

"Your work is unacceptable. Do it over, all of it. And this time I want it _clean_." Eren sighs but doesn't argue. It would've concerned him if Levi _didn't_ make him redo it.

"Yes sir." He picks up the brush and hesitates.

"Captain?" he says slowly. Levi pauses and looks over his shoulder. "Who…" He takes a moment to search for the right words and then his hesitant eyes meet Levi's, "Who do you think the real enemy is?" Levi regards him in silence for a moment.

And when he finally replies he's quiet and thoughtful, "As long as humanity exists, this world will always be a cruel place." Eren's eyes widen and something inside him ticks. Does that mean he thinks humanity is the enemy?

"What does that mean?"

"Humans are cruel and always have been." The tick turns into a spark and Eren's fuse is quick to light as he leaps to his feet. Anger simmers in his blood. How can the corporal say something like that? Isn't he supposed to be on humanity's side? He stands over Levi with clenched fists.

"So you're saying that we're fighting for no reason! We're trying to save a race that doesn't deserve to live! The world will be better off without any of us here!" Levi looks up at him with a dull unwavering gaze.

"Idiot, are you deaf?"

Eren's eyes widen in disbelief and he hisses through his teeth, "I heard your every word, Captain! You said humans are cruel!"

"That's right," Eren is about to interrupt but Levi holds up a hand to silence him, "But do you think beauty can exist in a place without cruelty?"

Eren falls silent and his hands unclench. A place where everything is beautiful… is that the same as beauty not existing at all? And is a place where darkness and cruelty lurk around every corner—somewhere like the world they live in now—a place where beauty _can_ exist? Maybe so, maybe that's why they fight. The beauty that they're always searching for, no matter how small or heavily veiled it may be could be the reason people fight to survive, why they yearn to see another day. So as long as there's cruelty in this world, there will always be something to fight for.

"Oh…"

"Next time, hear people out before you blow out their eardrums with your pointless shouting." Eren rubs the back of his neck and smiles sheepishly.

"Right, sorry." With a groan, Eren crouches and picks up the discarded brush. He pulls his sleeves a little higher and resumes cleaning the tile.

"What do you think you're doing?" Eren's head snaps up to look at Levi inquisitively.

"I'm cleaning just like you told me to," he replies in confusion. Levi's brow puckers with distaste and his lip pulls down.

"You're doing it wrong." Eren stares at his hands that are frozen mid-stroke.

"What?" How can someone clean _wrongly_?

"Don't you know how to properly clean?"

"Guess not," he mutters under his breath with an eye roll. Levi holds out his hand.

"Give me that," he orders, referring to the brush that Eren is clutching.

He didn't have to be told twice. Without a moment's hesitance, Eren tosses him the frayed brush and he deftly catches it. He rolls up his sleeves and stoops next to Eren. Once he's situated beside him, he scours furiously at the tile, all the muscles lining his arms tightening and relaxing with each push. His entire body lurches with the action. This part of Levi is irritating but it's also kind of…cute? An involuntary smile slips onto Eren's face without him knowing.

He watches for a few more minutes and then blurts, "Isn't this supposed to be _my _punishment?"

Levi pauses and looks at Eren. It seems like he's forgotten that minor detail. If Eren hadn't said anything, the corporal probably would've cleaned the whole place for him.

"Cleaning is hardly a punishment." But he gives the brush back to Eren anyway.

"Says you," he scoffs. Then Levi makes to rise to his feet but his movements stop short. He freezes mid-stride with a grimace.

"_Dammit_," he wheezes as he suddenly trips up and tumbles into Eren's lap. Eren squeaks in shock and he tries his best to catch him. He lands ungracefully in Eren's arms, half his body sprawled out over Eren's legs and half of him supported by his chest.

"Agh! Captain!" Levi's thin brows pull together in a faint wince and his entire body is limp. After the initial shock passes, concern soon surfaces and Eren carefully adjusts Levi's head so that it's cradled against the softest part of his thigh.

"Are you okay?" The only reply is the sound of Levi's deep measured breathing.

"Captain?"

"Quiet and let me rest a second," he growls but his voice is weak.

Eren is still and studies Levi's face. What happened? Is he still in pain from last night? He feels the urge to smooth out the folds of Levi's grimace. Unthinkingly his fingers hover over Levi's face and then he carefully sweeps the tips of his hair from out of his eyes. Those dark eyes break open at the touch and he stares up at Eren. They're blank. It makes Eren wonder what thoughts are going through his mind. Calloused fingertips linger over Levi's cheekbone and trail further down to his mouth. Eren's face heats up as he touches the jut of Levi's top lip and then his wrist is grappled by a strong hold.

"Don't," Levi mutters. His voice is quiet and cold and his eyes are tired.

"What am I doing?" Levi's eyes taper accusingly.

"And don't feign ignorance either."

"S-sorry…" Eren looks away and Levi releases his wrist. He pulls himself into a seated position with a quiet grunt and takes a deep breath as if bracing himself before struggling to his feet. The silence is thick and awkward and weighs heavily on Eren's shoulders.

Without looking at him Levi says, "I'll be back to check on your work later. No slacking." Eren nods.

"Yes sir." And then Levi leaves. Eren watches. Nothing about the corporal's gait suggests that he's feeling any kind of discomfort but for some reason, Eren doubts that's true.

* * *

Levi pushes back the keen pang that pulses through him and continues down the hall. He had stood too quickly before and it felt like something had ripped inside him. Moving around so much probably isn't smart but he doesn't have a choice. He has work to do. He turns down another hallway and almost bumps into a mindless MP. He's about to tell this asshole to watch where he's going but the words die on his tongue as he recognizes this particular MP.

"Hey! Watch where you're going!" the MP snaps angrily, stealing the words right out of Levi's mouth. When he glances at him, his eyes widen at the realization of whom he's just disrespected. His nose is still purple from being broken by Levi's knee.

"Oh, it's you," Levi says, pleased by the ugly swollen injury. The MP stiffens and his hand involuntarily goes to his nose as if hiding it now will keep Levi from noticing it.

"That shiner suites you." The MP glares at him angrily. He's tall and towers over Levi but he doesn't dare move a fraction closer to him. He won't underestimate his strength again.

"I have you to thank for that."

"It was my pleasure." And he means every word. Levi notices the other MP from before, the one that he'd punched in the stomach and made puke, shrinking away into the shadows. He feels a little guilty about that one. The pitiful fellow has turned a shade of green from the mere sight of Levi and he looks like he wants to turn and bolt.

"There's a rumor going around about you," the other MP comments without preamble. Levi shrugs, eyes returning to him.

"Like I care."

"They say someone saw you leave the general's room last night when that monster went berserk." _Oh shit._ Levi hadn't even thought about that. He'd left in such a hurry that he didn't try to hide his identity.

"Eren isn't a monster," he counters without thinking. Levi surprises himself with his sudden claim. Since when did he start defending that brat? The MP cocks an eyebrow.

"You're not going to deny it?"

"I don't give a damn what people say about me." The MP smirks.

"But you care about what's said about that freak." Levi turns his cheek.

"Wrong. I don't care," he replies with a dismissive wave of his hand. He starts to walk away but the MP goes on.

"What type of relationship do you have with him anyway? You two are too close for comfort, in my opinion." Levi spins on his heel and gets right up in the asshole's face. He falls back a step and swallows nervously.

"Only an idiot would continue to provoke the man who smashed in his nose. Tell me, do you have any brains inside that ugly head of yours?" The MP doesn't visibly react. He's frozen in fear. That sharp, severe look in Levi's eye sends chills down his spine.

"If you have any common sense you won't push me any further, do you understand what I'm saying?" Levi is at his limit. His patience is threadbare and this MP is close to severing all that's left of it. On normal circumstance, he couldn't care less about anything this asshole had to say but he was already past his threshold the moment this unfortunate idiot ran into him. Levi won't be able to control himself if his anger is let loose.

"Yes sir," the MP replies uneasily.

"Good." Levi turns to leave. "This hasn't been a pleasant encounter and I'm not looking forward to a next one. Let's try not to let that happen."

* * *

"Annie…" Armin is seated in a rickety wooden chair next to the solid crystal cocoon that sheathes her. They've relocated her into an underground detainment chamber. The rest of the survey corps are away at the moment and he's left alone with her. The only time he ever speaks to Annie is when no one else is around, that way he can say things that are personal. He stares at the cold motionless crystallite with sorrow.

"Are you afraid you'll be tortured if you come out?" The only response is silence and the ache Armin feels. He sighs and looks down at the folded hands in his lap. His fingers tug and pull at each other in a nervous habit.

"I know I've told you before but I really don't think you're a bad person. You've made horrible mistakes, many that can't be forgiven but to me…" he tracks off.

"I want to know why you did it. I don't understand it at all." Tears are pulling in the backs of his eyes.

"I trusted you, we all trusted you and I'm angry. Please, I beg you, come out of there and explain yourself!" The tears spill over and tumble down his cheeks. Roughly he wipes them away on his sleeve feeling ashamed at himself for being so strongly affected and sniffles.

"I don't want to believe that you're an enemy of humanity. I don't want to believe any of my friends could ever betray us so easily." His crestfallen whispers echo in the underground cave.

"My gamble…from before, I won it didn't I? What does that mean then? What am I supposed to think?" He rises to his feet and stands just in front of her. Through the translucent white crystal, he sees her face—eyes shut peacefully, expression vulnerable and untarnished by any sign of pain or misery. She looks perfectly blissful like that as if deep in sleep.

Armin's hand touches the hardened stone just over her face. He wants to know what her skin feels like. Is it warm? Would it feel soft against his palm? He's never been so close to her yet he's an entire world away.

"Annie…"

* * *

"He hurt you didn't he?" It isn't a question. Irvin knows Levi isn't unharmed. He takes Levi's hand and pulls at the sleeve. Before he can pull it high enough to expose his thin wrist, he jerks his hand away and crosses his arms over his chest.

"Levi!" Irvin snaps. Then the anger dissipates and his voice is gentle. "Let me see the damage." When Levi doesn't make any effort to move Irvin reluctantly adds, "That's an order."

Levi hesitates. Irvin has never ordered him around unless it dealt with military matters, whether directly or indirectly. To give him a personal order is new. Then he gives an indignant scoff and turns his cheek. His arm thrusts forward and Irvin gently takes his hand in his again with a sigh. This time Levi doesn't move away and allows Irvin to see the swollen purple ring of flesh that bracelets his wrist.

"Bondage? He used bonds?"

"No, I like to beat myself with shackles until my flesh is fucking raw in my spare time," he replies sharply. Irvin ignores his cutting tone.

"What else did he do to you?" Levi shrugs offhandedly but there's a spark of resentment in his eyes and his teeth audibly gnash together.

"What the hell do you think he did to me? It was your goddamn order." The muscle in Irvin's jaw flexes and he frowns.

"Show me all your injuries." Levi sighs, his eyes flicked over to the wall, and slides his arm from out of Irvin's light hold.

"They're minor. It's not—"

"Levi," Irvin draws out slowly with absolute authority. Levi blinks.

"There are no more injuries." But Irvin hears the lie in his voice and his expression hardens.

"Is that so? Take off your shirt then." Levi remains still and Irvin quirks an eyebrow.

"Am I going to have to make that an order?"

"Tch!" Levi angrily fingers the buttons on the front of his shirt. He has to focus all of his attention on the ordinarily simple task because with Irvin's steel blue eyes steadily on him like this, it's become a challenge. He yanks it off his shoulders and it falls to the floor. His chest is almost unmarred, only a few scarce, small bruises here and there that could be from anything.

"Turn around." Levi does as he's told. Only remnants of the scratches remain. The red streaks are faded into dark purple lines and will vanish altogether in half day's time at most. Still, the sight of the damage Levi has been dealt wrenches at Irvin's heart. It's his fault. Irvin hopes this sacrifice will be worth it in the end. To have this mission pass is imperative for the chance to gain information from the colossal and armored titans.

His fingers touch the marks from sharp shoulder blades down his sides. Against his will, Levi's heartbeat stutters at the sensation of the tips of Irvin's warm, scarred fingers on his bare skin. The places where Irvin's fingers make contact with Levi's skin heat up instinctively and his eyelids fall as he relaxes into the touch.

Then the door slams open and they both jolt.

"Oh!" cries out a shocked Hanji and hastily shuts the door behind her. She leans against the frame with her head tilted down and through her hair, her bright eyes scope out Irvin and Levi.

"Don't mind me. Please continue."

"Don't you know how to knock?" Levi demands as he bends down and snatches his shirt up from the floor. Clearly irritated, he roughly thrusts his arms through the sleeves and buttons the front. Without another word, he leaves and Hanji smirks as he passes.

"Hmm…" she murmurs to herself thoughtfully with a surreptitious smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.

* * *

Eren sighs and opens the door to the bedroom. His arms are weak and shaky from scrubbing the floors all day; he dusted very little and didn't even get to start cleaning the dorms yet. He came back to change his clothing. The ones he's currently wearing are clinging to his skin with moisture and they're splattered with a mix of muddied water and dust. His feet drag forward and he shuts the door behind him. He's about to collapse onto the bed when he notices that Levi is already sitting there.

"Don't worry Captain, I'm just here to change my clothes," he mumbles automatically, without bothering to look at him. He slips off his shirt and grabs for a new one. After he puts it on, he feels a bit more refreshed and takes a deep breath. When he turns around to look at the corporal, he notices that he's shirtless and is warily watching him.

"What're you doing here anyway? Shouldn't you and Commander Irvin be meeting with the general or something?"

"I spoke with Irvin already. Now we're waiting to be summoned by General Zacklay." Eren sits down and Levi's hands recoil like he's hiding something. He straightens higher and bends around Levi's shoulder to see what he's holding.

"Medicine?" Levi's fist closes around the tube and he doesn't reply.

"Do you need help with that?" With a snort, Levi untwists the cap and squeezes out a generous amount into the palm of his hand. He twists around and slaps the paste onto his back as if to prove a point. It sticks in a big clump on his shoulder. His hand lathers it in circles but he can't reach very far and most of it remains in the one area at his shoulder. He failed to prove anything.

"Let me help you," says Eren, positioning himself behind Levi, his legs stretched out on either side of his hips.

"I don't need your help," he retorts but he doesn't stop him when his palms smother in the rest of the medicine over the fading scratch lines. Once every inch of Levi's back is covered, Eren traces a particularly long streak with his fingers.

"Where did you get these?" he whispers. Unsurprisingly Levi doesn't reply. Eren sighs and his head hangs. His forehead rests against the space between Levi's shoulder blades and he closes his eyes.

"I was really worried about you, you know." Eren feels Levi's shoulders swell with an usually long breath.

"I know." His voice reverberates through his body and somehow sends calming warmth through Eren.

"Will you tell me what happened?"

"You know what happened." Eren slowly looks up at the mirror across the room and sees Levi's reflection there. The typical guise of indifference is schooled on his features.

"No I don't."

"I was doing my job." Eren's mouth presses into a hard line but he doesn't push the subject any further. It's pointless; Levi is a stubbornly secretive man.

Eren lifts his hands and holds onto Levi's shoulders. With his thumbs, he kneads into the tense muscle there. After a second, Levi rolls his head to the side and allows Eren more access. His fingers rub the tension between his shoulder blades in gradual soothing circles. He works the strained muscles along his lower back and sides, up his neck and even gently massages his scalp. Levi takes in a slow breath and his eyelids droop. Eren is surprised when he leans back into his touch.

"Am I doing alright?"

"Just keeping going," comes the curt reply. And so he does. Eren can feel the masses of strained fibers scattered throughout Levi's muscles. There's a lot of pressure and it must be painful.

"I don't think I've ever felt this much tension in one person before," he mutters. There's one particularly stubborn knot at the dip right above his right shoulder blade. Eren's hands guide Levi's head forward to open the area a bit more then he presses his knuckles into the hardened lump.

"Ah…" he hisses. Eren knows it probably hurts but the strain won't be released without the pressure. Eren digs deeper until the muscles in his fingers and forearms burn. When the knot has relaxed as best as it can, he tilts forward.

"Feel better?" Eren knows Levi won't admit to anything so he doesn't wait for an answer. Instead, his head bends low and his lips gently press against the bone that juts out at the nape of his neck, a feather light peck there. Levi doesn't seem to notice and remains still.

A loud knock at the door interrupts them.

"Corporal Levi, the general has requested a meeting with you." Eren feels Levi grow stiff.

"And he said to bring Jaeger." At that the strange sudden rigidity softens and Levi glances over his shoulder at him.

"Let's go."

By the time they enter the conference room, Irvin, Mikasa, and General Zacklay are already there along with various other diplomats that Eren vaguely recognizes from his court trial. The general is seated at the head of the long wooden table and Irvin is at the other end while Mikasa sits to the side with two empty seats next to her. Levi and Eren mechanically occupy those seats.

"As you should know, I have agreed to Commander Irvin's proposition," General Zacklay begins at their arrival. His hands are folded under his chin and he has a serious, commanding air about him.

"I am sending Corporal Rivaille along with Scout recruits, Jaeger and Ackerman outside the wall to locate the colossal and armored titans for debriefing." There are murmurs amongst the other diplomats and one man speaks up.

"Why would they be willing to tell them anything?"

"Jaeger thinks that if he goes to their home, they will reveal the truth about the titan menace. Before, at the time he was almost taken, they agreed to disclose everything once they arrived at their intended destination, our troops attacked before that happened."

There is more buzz of whispering and another question is asked, "What if this is merely a ploy for Jaeger to escape and join the traitors?" Zacklay nods and eyes the three in front of him, addressing them directly.

"As this is a possibility, if you do not return within 72 hours, troops will be sent out to retrieve Jaeger."

"Isn't 72 hours a bit stingy?" Commander Irvin pipes in.

"That is my final decree, Commander." His eyes focus on Eren.

"You need to return here willingly or there will be consequences, understand?" They still don't trust him. Eren bites back his anger at this realization and rigidly nods.

"Yes sir."

"Corporal Rivaille." Zacklay looks at Levi now and Eren closely analyzes the way the two men interact. "Even if you do not achieve your goal you _must_ return within 72 hours with Jaeger. The time will not be extended on any circumstance, am I clear?"

"Crystal." There's nothing in either Levi's manner or the general's that suggests that they've interacted outside the conference room. They regard each other with professional detachment.

"Even if Rivaille is disabled or falls in battle, Jaeger's return is critical." Zacklay's eyes focus on Levi's, then Mikasa's, and finally Eren's. They're stony and sharp and intimidating and Eren has to avert his eyes from that gaze.

Mikasa and Eren reply in unison, "Yes sir."

"Good. Go prepare and be ready to leave by dawn." The three of them stand. There are murmurs of discontent among the diplomats but no one argues. They salute and swiftly exit. Once they're out of the room, Levi speaks to Eren and Mikasa.

"Ready your gear and get a good night's rest. We won't be getting much sleep for the next few days. 72 hours isn't much time."

"Captain, do you really think we can find them _and_ talk to them in just three days?" asks Mikasa, tone full of doubt.

"Doesn't matter, we will do it. We have no other choice."

* * *

They're back in their room and Eren is curled on his side of the bed facing Levi who's propped up against the headboard, reading the same report he's already read a hundred times over.

"Captain," he whispers.

"Go to sleep," comes the automatic reply, without breaking his concentration on the papers in his hands.

"I can't until you do."

"Do it anyhow." A frustrated sigh is heaved from deep in Eren's chest.

"Weren't you the one who said we needed to get a good night's rest?" Finally Levi's head rolls to the side and he looks at Eren. The candlelight cuts sharp shadows in his already angular face and his eyes reflect the flames, creating orange orbs of light in his pupils.

"Fine." He sets the papers to the side and slides under the covers. He automatically turns over, facing away from Eren.

With a short nervous breath, his heart racing inside his chest, Eren reaches over and pulls the blankets higher over Levi's shoulder and moves over to his side of the bed. He tentatively wraps an arm around Levi's waist and pulls him near, his face nestling into the crook of Levi's neck. He breathes in deeply the distinctive soapy clean scent that the corporal has. A sense of calming warmth instantly washes over him and his eyes fall shut. As long as Levi is near, he feels warm.

"What did I say about keeping your hands to yourself? How do you expect me to sleep like this?" Levi grumbles. Eren's arms tighten around him.

"Please…" _Just this one night, let me hold you._

Eren isn't sure what lies in store. He doesn't know how much time they'll have left. People are always dying around him and it scares him. It's a constant fear lurking in the back of his mind that he can never escape from. That's why he wants to cling onto Levi's present existence while he still can. There's no telling when that will change. Feeling Levi's shoulders expand with each breath and the beat of his heart in his chest acts as a comfort. Levi holds onto Eren's wrist and Eren thinks that he's going to unlock his arm from around him but instead he pulls him a little closer so that his back fits into the curve of Eren's body like a puzzle piece.

"What a pain," he sighs but there's no real spite there. Eren smiles contentedly.

* * *

**Afterword: Mmm... I think I said I like slow builds before and I think that shows here LOL. Again, sorry if you're disappointed by this chapter! **

**Writing about Levi's massage made me crave one so badly! UGH! **


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's note: Oh gosh...All of the reviews were so kind. It made me really happy. And there were a few that made me laugh. Thank you very much! ^^  
**

**This chapter is the longest one I've written so far and I wasn't even close to finishing it but I wanted to update before tomorrow.  
**

**This chapter is most likely boring since it's mostly just of them adventuring and the primary focus isn't on the relationships and drama between the characters. But it couldn't be helped.**

**Also, if you haven't read up to chapter 49 in the manga, there might be some parts where you won't fully understand some of the reasons behind what the characters say or do. **

* * *

**Playlist for this chapter:  
**

**1. SNK OST: XL-TT**

**2. SNK OST: EMA**

**3. SNK OST: Body Motion**

**4. 歌ってみた Hybrid by kradness**

**5. Last Resort (Nightcore remix) by Papa Roach**

**6. Too Bright to See Too Loud to Hear by Underoath **

* * *

Eren is the first to wake up for once and the sight curled up next to him is gratifying. Levi is facing his way and he has that peaceful vulnerable look on his face. Not a single line of anger or pain blemishes his expression—just like a child. A smile instinctively slips onto Eren's mouth as he watches. His breathing is deep and steady and his lips are parted. With a feather light touch, Eren's fingertips trace his cheek—it's surprisingly smooth and free of scars so unlike the rest of him. Eren wonders how he managed to keep it that way.

The tips of his fingers move down along his strong jawline and across his thin bottom lip. The breath that slips past his parted lips is warm against Eren's skin. There's a twitch at his brow and Eren quickly moves his hand away. His silvery eyes crack open and land on Eren. They're bleary and unfocused. Slowly he sits up with a lost look.

"You're awake? Did I oversleep or something?" Eren shakes his head and with a small grunt, pulls himself into a seated position next to him.

"I just woke up before you, that's all. We still have some time before we have to get ready." Levi slouches forward and runs a hand through his bedhead. There are heavy bags under his eyes and he looks like he could use more rest.

"How do you feel?" Is it too soon for Levi to be moving around? Only yesterday he hadn't been at full strength. Is he recovered now?

"Like a hundred friggin' bucks," he replies in his typical unreadable tone. Eren can't tell if he's lying. There's nothing in his expression or his voice to suggest that he feels anything at all.

"Do you really?"

There's a pause and then Levi turns a cheek, "No, you're right, I feel like _two_ hundred bucks."

It's been a while since Eren has worn his uniform. It feels a little heavy on his shoulders but it's a familiar comforting weight. He's missed it. He glances over at Levi who's adjusting the ascot around his throat. Seeing Levi in uniform is also something he's missed. He supposes it's because for such a long time he had admired Levi from a distance and his uniform had always been a symbol of how he protects humanity unconditionally. And Eren wants to be just like that.

Eren begins to strap on his gear. He's fingering the buckle around his chest when Levi interrupts.

"Wait. Don't put on your gear right now." Eren pauses and looks to him in confusion.

"Why not?" Levi has a boot propped up on a wooden chair and is in the middle of adjusting his buckles. He tugs the strap around his small thigh with an audible snap and glances at him.

"You won't need it until later." Eren still doesn't get it but from Levi's tone, he can tell that he's through explaining. He's not going to elaborate.

"What should I do with it then?" Levi thrusts his chin toward an empty bag that lies at the foot of the bed.

"Pack it away for now." Eren stuffs it as best he can inside and zips it up. He waits patiently for Levi to finish dressing from the edge of the bed. He tries not to openly stare. His eyes wander the room, pointedly avoiding the area where Levi is, bent over the chair, but they end up returning every few seconds anyway. If Levi notices Eren watching him, he doesn't say anything and continues to tighten the straps around his legs.

Once Levi is fully dressed and all the straps to his gear are situated, he pulls his jacket over his shoulders and heads to the door.

"Let's eat."

* * *

"Levi." Levi doesn't bother to turn around. He knows that voice better than his own.

"Don't fail me," Irvin says, coming to a halt at his side. They're looking off over the wall at the land below. It's barren and foreboding—dangerous borders that they've treaded together for many years.

"Tch, have I ever?" A small smile forms at the corners of Irvin's mouth then it fades and he glances at Levi from the corner of his eye.

"I won't be with you this time." That's right. Other than the time Levi was injured, this will be the first operation they've ever pulled where they'll be separated. They've always been each other's second pair of eyes and ears. They might not have always fought by each other's side but there was the constant comfort of knowing that somewhere on the frontline, they were fighting the same battle. This time, Levi will be on his own. Emptiness holes its way in Levi's chest.

"Don't miss me too badly," he forces out. Irvin laughs but its low and subdued. His hand rests on Levi's shoulder and he pulls him so that they're facing one another.

For a long time, Irvin stares into his eyes. Levi doesn't know what he's thinking and his face doesn't disclose much but Levi's heart stutters at the uncharacteristic intensity in those eyes. The cold demeanor that usually hardens those steel eyes isn't there and he looks at Levi in a tender way. Levi is ashamed for being affected and can't keep the eye contact. A strong hand is at his chin and pulls his eyes back.

"What…?" Levi's eyes widen when he realizes Irvin's face is too close. He's so close that he can see himself reflected back in his blue irises. Levi can't control the quick speed of his pulse or the startled intake of breath as the little space grows even smaller when Irvin tilts closer. Instinctively he falls back a step but Irvin catches the back of his neck and pulls him forward, not allowing him to expand the space between them. The moment their lips should touch passes and Levi won't admit that he feels a sinking feeling of disappointment. Irvin skirts around and his mouth is level with Levi's ear.

With a voice low and intimate, he murmurs, "Come back intact. That's an order." As long as Irvin orders it, Levi has to obey. He's a perfect pawn, after all.

"I plan to. I hate pointless deaths the most."

Irvin breaks away and with a smile he says, "I know."

* * *

"Hey Eren!" The remaining recruits from the 104th squad have come to see Eren off.

"Guys!" A big smile splits Eren's face in half and his chest swells. Seeing his friends alive and together lessens the weight that he carries on his shoulders. There's Connie, Sasha, Armin, and Jean; he overlooks the empty holes that should be filled by Reiner, Bertholdt, Annie, and Ymir. He'll get them back soon.

"Come back safe, y'hear?" Sasha says with a wide grin.

"You'd love the Military Police cafeteria, they've got enough food to fill even your bottomless stomach." Her brow arches with skepticism.

"There ain't no way that's true." Eren laughs, now that he thinks about it, there's probably no amount of food that could satisfy Sasha.

"Maybe not but they do have plenty of meat." A curious twinkle brightens her eyes.

"Meat y'say? I might hav'ta check 'em out." Eren wonders a bit about Sasha's new speech pattern that rolls off her tongue so naturally but he doesn't comment on it. It really suits her and he doesn't want to embarrass her into hiding it. Her smiling brown eyes flick to Mikasa.

"Don't worry, I'll save yer rations fer ya." Mikasa doesn't smile and her eyes remain impassive but she nods her head and murmurs, "Thanks." Eren beams. He's glad Mikasa is opening up to the others. It might be slow but she's making progress.

"Hey, do me a favor," Connie says, breaking Eren's attention from Sasha.

"Sure, what is it?" He clutches firmly onto Eren's hand at the space between their thumbs and index fingers and looks him straight in the eye.

"Punch that asshole Reiner in the face for me." There's a sharp curl of Eren's top lip over his incisors—a look of hardline determination.

"You got it."

"And he better explain himself too." Eren gives a short nod.

"I'll make sure he does."

Next is Armin. He looks at Eren with eyes full of memories and warmth. They're best friends—Armin, Eren, and Mikasa. Separating is never easy. Knowing that this could be the last time they'll ever see each other only makes it harder, instead they have to trust in one another that they'll return. So Armin doesn't say how much he needs for Eren and Mikasa to come back, he doesn't think about the memories they've shared, they already know all of that anyway, so he braves this separation with a strong smile.

"I'll be waiting," is all he says. Eren takes Armin's shoulder and Mikasa takes both of their hands in hers.

"We won't leave you behind," Eren reassures him. Armin nods. He knows that they won't. They never have.

"Take care, Armin," says Mikasa.

"Yeah, you too."

"I'll watch over things while you're gone," Jean intercepts. They turn to him and Eren nods with a grateful smile.

"Thanks." Next he addresses Mikasa with a slight color blossoming at the tips of his ears.

"Be careful and come back safe, okay?" His voice is kind and earnest, contrasting greatly with how he speaks to Eren.

"Yeah," she replies quietly, her mouth hidden by her scarf. Eren thoughtlessly points out at Jean's face.

"Hey…Why did your ears turn red?" The deepening of Jean's red color and his jumpy reaction to the question puzzles Eren. Jean's hands shoot to his ears and his cupped palms shield them from sight.

"What are you talking about? They're not red!" Eren's eyes narrow inquisitively and his bottom lip puckers.

"But—" From out of nowhere Levi is there pinching onto Eren's ear and with a muttered "That's enough, we're wasting time," tugs him away, unknowingly saving Jean from any more humiliation.

"Ow! That hurts!" he howls. Levi let's go and he rubs his stinging ear with a wounded sulk.

"It's almost sunrise. We have to get going."

* * *

Eren's not sure for how long they had been riding when Levi tells them to stop but it hadn't felt like much time had passed since they departed. They come to a halt and Levi looks directly at Eren.

"The further we travel into Titan turf, the more likely it is we'll run into trouble. I told you not to put on your gear for a reason, Eren."

"You want me to transform into a titan." Levi nods and strokes the broad neck of his horse. It's the horse they had found in the abandoned stables. It's healthy now and regained of strength. It bends its muzzle into Levi's palm affectionately.

"But won't that just bring more attention to him?" Mikasa questions cynically. Levi regards her with a deadpan.

"Either way we'll run into titans but as long as we're on horseback, we won't be able to fight them. We'll have no other choice but to outrun them and we can't run forever. We have a long way to go and the horses will exhaust. We have to sustain their energy by pacing them."

"But Eren will tire out," Mikasa argues. Eren glares at her.

"I can run, Mikasa. I'm not weak." His tone is defensive and cutting but Mikasa doesn't even blink. Levi disrupts their heated stare down.

"I'm not saying he has to run the entire way, just 'til we get to the forest where we'll be able to use our gear."

"I don't—" Mikasa begins and is cut off by Eren.

"I can do it," he claims with unwavering resolve, intense eyes fixed to hers. Her firm stance falters at that look and he swiftly dismounts. After taking a few steps away, he turns to look over his shoulder. Levi and Mikasa are watching his every move.

"Uh, you might want to give me space," he warns a little warily. They back up a little and Eren brings his hand to his face. He bites down hard and the familiar tang of rust fills his mouth. It hurts like hell and he swallows a cry. Why isn't anything happening?

"Not again!" he growls in frustration. His mouth opens wider to bite down with even more force this time when Levi's impassive voice breaks his concentration.

"Eren, think about the one thing that affects you the most." Eren meets his dull eyes and thinks.

"The one thing that affects me the most…?" He doesn't have to spend much time thinking because the one thing that affects him the most is… Eren's narrowed eyes lock on Levi. He bites down again.

And the sound of flesh and muscle pulling and tearing rips through the still air. Eren grows higher and higher until he's a part of the clear blue sky above them. His head angles downward to look at the small forms of Mikasa and Levi.

"Go with him," Levi tells Mikasa. "You'll be able to protect him from higher up when we run into titans." She didn't have to be told twice as she readily leaps to the ground and ties their horses together.

She gazes up at Eren's looming titan and calls up to him,"Eren! I'm going with you!" His giant hand comes down to rest upright by her feet and she steps into the middle of it. Once she's settled safely at his shoulder, fingers tangled in his hair, Eren takes off with Levi close behind.

He runs for a long time and they have yet to see any titans. He doesn't know exactly how much time has passed but the sun is high above him. It's already past midday. And the deeper they travel into titan borders, the more his apprehension grows. It's been too quiet. Eren twists around to check on Levi's position. The corporal is at his heels, eyes narrowed straight-ahead, his scouting cloak billowing behind him. The horses are strong and fast and they keep up with Eren's pace effortlessly.

"Eren, titan, 2 o' clock," Mikasa warns into his ear. He returns face forward and to his right a four-meter is headed their way. He easily plows through it. Hopefully they won't run into any real challenges. In the back of his mind he knows he's hoping for something that's not possible.

Three more seven-meter titans are coming at them and Eren gets ready to beat into them. Mikasa makes the first attack on the closest one and Eren goes for the one just behind that. Together, they easily take them down in seconds. But Eren hadn't noticed the additional titans running at them in the distance.

They're close now and there are a few 11-meter titans among the others in this pack. He takes out some of the smaller ones along with Mikasa but it's not as easy this time. One of the 11-meter titans grapples him and he takes a hit to his shoulder. Mikasa is thrown off balance. Before she falls, Eren catches her and holds her protectively in front of his chest.

There's a slight sting at his leg and then at his shoulder then at his forearm. It feels like small insect bites. From the corner of his eye he sees a shadow zip by in the air. It's so fast that Eren has trouble keeping it in sight. It shoots high into the air and arcs around the 11-meter titan from behind. It's Levi. Eren realizes that he's lodging the hooks of the 3D gear into his skin to maneuver around as a makeshift support. He slices through the titan and it falls.

Eren knocks down the Titan at his left and the one coming in behind it while Levi takes care of the ones at his right and at his back. Mikasa joins Levi's side and together they destroy the titans before they can reach him. He continues to run at a pace no longer hindered by the attacks due to Levi's help.

Suddenly the corporal is on his shoulder.

"Eren," he says with eerie calm. He's not even winded from fighting. "Do you have good aim?" Eren doesn't understand the question.

"See those titans?" Levi points in front of them to the right and about fifty meters away, a group of ten or more titans are charging at them.

"Do you think you can throw me over there?" _Throw him?_ He's insane! There's no way Eren is going to sling him around like a sack of garbage. He shakes his head; it's way too dangerous and there are too many for one person to handle.

"Do it anyway." Eren shakes his head again with more vigor.

"That's an order, Eren!" An irritated growl rumbles in his throat and he reluctantly sets an open palm by his shoulder. Levi springs into it and bears his weight in a ready stance.

"Whatever happens don't stop running, understand?" The sharpened blades twirl deftly in Levi's nimble bloodstained fingers. Eren growls again and its ignored.

"Do it now." Before Eren can change his mind, his arm winds back and with all of his might he launches Levi toward the horde of titans. At once Eren loses sight of him but soon the titans begin to quickly plummet to the ground.

Eren focuses ahead with Mikasa still working around him but without Levi, he isn't able to keep up his speed. And Mikasa isn't willing to lodge the grapple hooks into Eren's skin so the only support she has are the titans around them. With Eren smashing in skulls and Mikasa cutting out napes, they fall into a rhythm until they've completely demolished the mass of titans.

Mikasa is at his shoulder again after a few minutes of peace.

"Where's Levi?" Eren's heart races uncomfortably inside his chest. He wishes he had the answer to her question. His eyes scan the area where he had thrown him but there's nothing there. And he's not sure if that's a good sign or a bad one. There aren't any titans or clouds of steam from titan carcasses, there's no sign of him at all—just where the hell is he?

Every minute torturously drags by not knowing where Levi is. Eren wants to stop. He _needs_ to stop. He doesn't care that it'd be disobeying orders. That order had been a stupid one anyway. Right as he's about to come to a halt, a small shape appears running along on the ground. It's Levi on horseback and he looks perfectly unharmed. Eren lets out an internal sigh of relief. Now that the corporal has arrived, a burst of energy blazes through him and he tears forward.

"A deviant." It runs their way in incomprehensible zigzags. Eren's muscles twitch with anticipation but before the titan impales him, it whirls to the side and goes for Levi. A giant hand swats at the horse and Levi just barely moves out of the way in time. Eren tackles the titan and jerks it away from the corporal.

Liquid fire blazes through his veins and he beats senselessly into its skull. Blood splashes his face and his hands are slippery with chunks of meat and gore. But he doesn't stop. He keeps bludgeoning into its head until the bone is nothing but shattered grains, until the brains are mashed into slush against the shredded flesh. The titan is disintegrating and still, Eren's fists impale the corpse.

"Eren!" Mikasa yells into his ear. "Get a hold of yourself!" He freezes and releases the mutilated body. The uncontrollable anger is gone and he looks down at Levi who's by his feet, staring up at him with creased brows. For a second he doesn't say anything. From this distance, Eren can't see the expression on his face clearly.

"Keep moving," he commands. He doesn't sound concerned in the slightest by Eren's uncalled for episode of madness but he never truly sounds concerned by _anything. _

Just as Mikasa had predicted, Eren is tiring out. His lungs burn and there's a painful stitch in his side. He tries to pull through the discomfort but his pace suffers drastically. He feels a gentle stroke on his cheek.

"Are you alright?" Mikasa asks. He nods once.

"Maybe we should stop and let you rest a bit," she suggests. "It'll be bad if we run into more titans while you're exhausted like this." Eren shakes his head and continues on.

"Don't push yourself." Eren wants to tell her that she's not his mother or even his older sister; that she needs to stop nagging. The forest is close. He can see it now. Only a bit longer then he'll be able to rest. Just as the dawn of hope arises, he sees a small group of titans huddled ahead of them and that hope fades. He's too tired to fight. The titans notice him and immediately charge his way. He sucks in a deep breath and plows forward.

"Eren…"

He can hear the worry in her voice. He hurls a fist at the closest titan but before it connects, the titan's eyes roll into the back of its head and it collapses at his feet. Eren is stunned for a moment. Then he sees Levi flipping in the air and swiftly slicing out chunks of the other titans that are coming at him. Single handedly he kills the group and clears the way. He'd been so fast that neither Eren nor Mikasa had time to react. Seeing Levi in combat is scary. He's not sure how one man manages to slaughter that many titans on his own. Levi lands on Eren's shoulder at Mikasa's side.

"You can change back now." Immediately Eren falls to his knees. They leap off his shoulder and give him space. Steam and heat is unleashed and Eren rises from out of the titan's neck. He rips free of the tangles of flesh and crawls out. His entire body heaves with heavy breathing once he's spread out on the ground. All of the energy is drained from his body. His arms and legs tremble and he can't keep his eyes open for even a second longer. The last thing he remembers is the feel of strong arms lifting him from the ground before he blacks out.

When Eren regains consciousness he's propped against a solid, warm body. He groans and lifts his head.

"Where are we?" His voice is hoarse and heavy and barely audible.

"We're still in the forest," Levi replies. "With any luck we're getting close to where your friends are."

"How do you feel?" Mikasa asks from beside them.

"I'll be fine. I'm just a little weak." He closes his eyes and leans against Levi's back. Underneath the scouting cloak, his hands feel around Levi's waist and his feeble arms wind around him. Levi's weight shifts as he moves to hold Eren's wrist and fastens the grip tighter around him. Eren's heart lurches and his face heats up.

"Captain…" he murmurs on the verge of passing out once again.

"What is it?" Eren doesn't have much strength to reply but he manages a single breathless question.

"…Did I…do okay?"

"Yeah, you did well." And his voice is quiet and gentle and wraps Eren in a blanket of ease. If Levi says he's done something well then it must be true.

* * *

More titans. Just what they needed. Levi's rough movements joggle Eren and his eyes crack open. Mikasa bolts toward the leading titan and swiftly averts around to its neck and slays it. But the ones she bypassed are going for Levi and Eren. Eren only barely registers that they're being attacked. His mind is slow from the utter exhaustion.

"Hold on to me," Levi orders. Eren doesn't waste any time obeying; he holds tight to Levi's midsection and he uses his gear to catapult them out of the way. The horses split and scatter and the titans immediately chase after Levi and Eren. With the added weight, Levi isn't as agile when maneuvering but the titans don't have a chance in any case. The titans disappear from sight and the only sound is that of the trees whipping past.

"What about Mikasa?"

"She'll be fine." Eren bites his lip. He knows Mikasa is plenty capable but he doesn't like being separated from her.

"Can we wait for her?" Their momentum shifts and they turn to a high branch and land. Eren let's go of Levi and settles a palm against the trunk to support his weight. Levi watches him as he takes in a deep breath and straightens up, forcing himself to remain steady even though his body is on the brink of collapsing.

"There," Levi suddenly says. Eren's eyes follow Levi's line of sight and he barely makes out a shadow zipping below them in their direction. Next to him, Eren feels Levi abruptly stiffen. His hands clench around the grips and his knees bend.

"Don't move," he commands and then he shoots off toward Mikasa. Why did he suddenly leave? Then Eren sees the group of titans chasing after her. They're close behind her, right at her back. But why doesn't she just retreat higher into the trees where they can't reach her?

One stretches out to her and she manages to jerk out of the way. She spins around and flips over the titan's head to its back. She cuts out the nape with a single deep blow. It falls but another one appears behind it. She flees and heads Eren's way. She's right below him now.

"Mikasa!" There's a titan coming at her from the side while she's engaged with the one at her heels. Without thinking he drops down to the lower branch right in front of the titan that Mikasa doesn't see. The bulbous eyes fix on Eren and he's defenseless. He doesn't have his gear and he's too tired to transform. The titan's mouth opens wide and comes at him.

Then Levi leaps out in front of it. Eren watches in horror as the titan's jaw snaps at Levi's arm. The teeth close in on his elbow but before the sharp edges can sever through him, he wrenches out of reach and shoves Eren backward.

"Idiot! Get out of the way!" Levi vaults over the titans head and quickly kills it. After the carcass disintegrates he marches up to Eren with a black glare. He jabs a finger at Eren's chest.

"Don't sacrifice yourself for anyone, got that? You're more valuable than anyone else," he growls. Anger bubbles up inside Eren and he duly counters Levi's glare.

"I'm not going to let my friends die!"

"Yes you will. Their lives will mean nothing if you die in their place." Eren's head fuzzes over with rage.

"That's not true! They mean everything to _me_!" At that Levi's glare softens a little but he refuses to yield.

"You don't have the freedom to choose how you die. The rest of us, we have the choice to die in the place of our comrades. Your death is up to humanity." Eren's teeth grind together and his fists clench.

"Then that means I'm just a pawn for humanity to use." Levi's eyes widen. The words strike a chord inside of him and he visibly jolts from the impact. But Eren doesn't notice, his gaze is bitterly diverted away from him.

"…That's not true. You're more than that." And his voice is low and distant. It takes Eren off guard. He eyes Levi questioningly but the corporal doesn't offer anything more.

"Come on," he says at last, "Mikasa is waiting and I've got a feeling her gear isn't working properly."

* * *

Armin is standing in front of Annie again. It's been so long since he's heard her voice that he's forgotten what it sounds like.

"Do you regret not killing me at that time? You probably wouldn't be here right now if you had." He stares at her frozen sleeping face. If she were awake right now, would she be angry with him? Would she try to kill him?

"I was the one who gave the commander your name. I ratted you out." And he hadn't felt any regret. He had been fulfilling his duty to humanity. But now, seeing her in this state… it wrenches at his heart.

"I wonder…" his fingertips trace the outline of her cheekbone.

"Does that make me a bad person to you?" Under the light pressure of his touch, the crystal suddenly fissures and a tendril of steam leaks out.

* * *

They aren't in the forest anymore. They broke through the line of giant trees a while ago. The day is ending as the sun has sunk low in the sky. Their first day is almost up and they have yet to find Reiner, Bertholdt and Ymir. Right now they look to be on the edges of the ruins of what used to be a town at one time. Parts of houses are scattered around and stone and rubble block their path. The horses avoid the debris as best they can but at times stumble when their hooves catch on serrated rock. Levi comes to a halt.

"It'll be more productive if we survey the place on foot." Eren's arms unwind from around him and he dismounts, he trips a little and Mikasa is there with a supportive hand at his elbow.

"Thanks."

They head deeper into the town where the buildings are more whole and actually resemble houses. The place has a chilling dark aura about it that sends shivers down Eren's spine. He walks a bit closer to Levi, seeking comfort. All of a sudden, Levi's head snaps to the right and his hands tighten around his blades.

"We've got company," he warns in a low voice.

"Eren! Mikasa!" A small blonde girl comes running over a small desolate hill that's a few meters away with a big smile plastered on her face.

"Wait!" Ymir appears behind her, snatches her wrist, and pulls her back. "You can't just approach them without thinking!" Christa's eyes widen and she turns to look at Eren and Mikasa. She doesn't move but it's obvious that she wants to close the distance between herself and her friends from the longing look in her round tear-blue eyes. Ymir rubs at her own temple as if she has a headache.

"You weren't supposed to expose our position. We were _spying. _You know, covert observation?" Christa's bottom lip puckers.

"But…they're our friends."

"Eren, what a pleasant surprise," another familiar voice booms from behind Ymir. Reiner comes to a halt at her side with his arms folded over his chest.

"You were such a pain when we were bringing you here before and now look where you are." His eyes shift from Eren and land on Levi.

"Captain," he says in surprise, his arms falling to his sides. Impulsively he straightens his posture and his fist hits his chest in a strong salute. Levi flashes a quizzical look.

"It was an honor fighting for you," he declares with utmost sincerity in his strong voice. Bertholdt interferes and rests a hand on Reiner's shoulder.

"But now you're a warrior, right?" Reiner's salute wilts and he slowly nods.

"That's right." Bertholdt regards them with an unfriendly guarded look that doesn't suit his generally kind face.

"I'm shocked you came here on your own," he says. "Why have you come?"

"I have some questions," Eren replies taking a step forward.

"And what makes you think we'll have the answers?" Reiner sharply retorts.

"Just tell me what you know!" Eren is frustrated and impatient and Reiner is only toying with him. He wants answers _now_!

"Weren't you going to tell me everything once we got here? Well I'm here now, so spill it!" Reiner and Bertholdt look at each other and remain silent. Finally Bertholdt speaks.

"We're not just going to tell you what we know without getting anything in return."

"What do you want?" asks Mikasa. There's a pause.

"We want Annie." Eren scoffs.

"How do you expect us to do that? She's frozen underground."

"The best we can do is ensure you her safety," Levi cuts in.

"That's not good enough."

They fall into a short silence and then Levi replies with a hard look, "Fine, we'll give her to you, only if you answer all of our questions first."

"You don't plan to keep your word, do you?" Reiner accuses. Without any hesitation, Levi's fist comes to his chest and his other arm bends behind his back.

"I give you my word. I'll do everything in my power to get the female titan back to you." Eren's eyes widen and he leans closer to speak into his ear.

"Captain, are you sure about this?" Levi doesn't look at him as he replies.

"I won't be able to convince the court to release her. No matter what, she'll remain detained." In other words, Levi was merely playing word games. Reiner and Bertholdt talk quietly to each other.

"Fine, we'll answer your questions," Reiner finally relents. "But not because I believe you. It's just that it's time for you to hear what we have to say." They descend the hill and stop just in front of them. Wary eyes inspect Levi's gear.

"I don't feel comfortable with you being armed," says Reiner.

"And I don't feel comfortable with your titan powers."

"We won't talk unless you disarm." Levi glares.

"There's no way in hell that's happening." Reiner grinds his teeth together and Levi's hands flinch to his swords. The tension buzzes around them and is thick enough to feel in the air. The hairs on Eren's arms stand on end.

"Stop it!" Christa cries as she leaps in front of Reiner and Levi to stand between them. Her palms press against their chests and she blocks them from becoming any closer to each other.

"Please don't fight," she begs. "No more fighting against our own. We're all a piece of humanity, aren't we?" A silence follows. The first to give in is Reiner as he sighs and takes a step back.

"Is there really any humanity left inside you?" Levi asks, eyes directed at him. Reiner grimaces.

"I want to believe there's still some good in me."

"That's all I need to hear." Levi replaces his blades in their casings. He looks at Christa and recognition sparks in his eyes.

"Historia Reiss." Historia's eyes widen and she stares at him stunned.

"You mean Christa," Eren corrects. Levi shakes his head.

"That's just an alias she's been living under." Ymir crosses her arms and blocks Historia from Levi's view by standing protectively in front of her. She peers down the bridge of her freckled nose at Levi.

"Leave her out of this."

"I can't. She plays a bigger role in this than you know."

"What the hell are you talking about?" she snaps.

"Pastor Nick mentioned her. He says she holds knowledge about the titans that are inside the walls." Historia peeks out from behind Ymir.

"I-I don't know anything about that." Levi isn't surprised.

"He said you probably weren't aware of the truth yourself." Then as an afterthought he adds, "I don't know why you're important but from what I can see, you're not like anyone else here." Her large eyes gaze up at him in wonder.

"What do you mean?" Levi looks at her with a strange expression. Eren hasn't ever seen him with such a look before. The harsh features that darken his face have softened.

"You'll find out for yourself," is his enigmatic reply. Eren thinks he knows what Levi means. Historia is a gentle person standing alone amongst the shadows in a cruel unforgiving world. She's compassionate and this world desperately needs someone like her to exist.

"It's getting late," Bertholdt observes. The sun has set below the horizon and the stray beams of light that manage to peek out are dim in a deep cerulean shade. "The place we stay isn't far from here. We'll take you there."

* * *

"They only had two spare rooms?" Levi asks once they're situated in the small room. Eren squirms uncomfortably at the question. Earlier he had spoken with Reiner and Bertholdt alone:

"_We have enough rooms for each of you," Bertholdt had said with a friendly smile. Eren scratched the back of his head in a sheepish manner._

"_Actually, we only need two." He had tried to sound nonchalant but it came off awkward. Reiner raised a brow. _

"_Uh, okay…that's fine I guess but I'd rather not hear you and Mikasa going at it, okay? So keep it down." _

"_Going at it?" Eren had naively wondered. Bertholdt laughed out loud with his head tossed back. _

"_Yeah, you know…?" Reiner sighed when Eren still failed to understand. Once he finished laughing, Bertholdt had leaned down and whispered into Eren's ear. Color rushed to Eren's face and he held up his hands defensively._

"_N-no! I'm not sharing a bed with Mikasa!" he had stammered. That was even more of a shock to Reiner and Bertholdt as they shot each other baffled looks. _

"_Are you sure the captain will be okay with that?" Eren had nodded. _

"_It's fine." There was doubt in Reiner's eyes._

"_Well…I don't want to hear the two of you going at it either." _

Eren covers his hot face in his hands. God, that had been embarrassing. He had wanted to share a room with Levi because it's comforting to have him close. He's used to the constant presence at his side during the night and he didn't want to face the loneliness that the distinct lack of warmth next to him would cause.

The bed sinks as Levi sits next to Eren. This bed is smaller than the one at the military police headquarters and Eren feels a little guilty. The corporal probably won't be comfortable.

"Today went better than I had expected." Levi is looking away at nothing in particular and from the single window, the pale moonlight reflects off his dark hair and blanches his skin of color. He almost appears harmless like that. _Almost_. If it weren't for his scary sharp eyes, it might be possible.

"I just hope tomorrow goes as smoothly."

"They've been cooperative so far, I don't think we have to worry."

"Don't let your guard down too much. You never know what others are thinking." That's a frustrating true statement. Never knowing what Levi is thinking is torture.

"I'm going to bathe." Eren's eyes follow him as he stands and heads to the door. He pauses just in the doorway with a hand pressed against the frame and glances over his shoulder at him.

"You should clean up too. You smell like blood." And then he disappears. Eren's eyes linger where Levi had just been standing. His heart hammers away at his ribs and his fingers curl in the sheets. What…? Why had it sounded like Levi was inviting him to bathe together? Eren shakes his head. He was just having hopeful thoughts, that's all. There's no way Levi would…

Someone enters the room and Eren's head snaps up expectantly but it's not who he'd thought it'd be.

"Hey Mikasa," he greets with a forced smile. She leans against the frame with her arms crossed.

"Do you feel alright?" Eren snorts.

"You're always asking me that." She doesn't reply and they fall into silence.

"You and Levi get along well," she comments without preamble. Eren doesn't know why she's suddenly saying something like this so he gives her a questioning look and shrugs.

"As well as anyone can get along with someone like him, I guess." But Mikasa's dark eyes penetrate him without wavering. That look doesn't bode well. He doesn't understand it. Is she angry? No she doesn't have any reason to be angry but maybe…

"Are you jealous?" he blurts. Mikasa's eyes widen and her pink mouth falls open a fraction.

"W-what are you saying?"

"If you wanted to spend time alone with Captain Levi all you had to do was ask," he says with a teasing smirk.

"I didn't know you felt that way about him." Mikasa's small nose scrunches up and she looks a little sick.

"No Eren. That's disgusting." His lips press together into a line and his brows crinkle.

"What? There's nothing wrong with that. It's not like you can choose who you're attracted to." A short breath bursts from her.

"I meant that no, I don't feel that way about him. Just the thought of even getting close to that man makes me sick."

"Why? Isn't he supposed to be every woman's dream?" Mikasa's eyes spark.

"I don't know anything about that. Isn't he a little old?" Eren hadn't thought about that before—Levi's age. Just how old is he anyway? While he's wondering about that, he doesn't notice that Mikasa is gone.

She walks down the hall feeling slighted. Whenever Eren hears or sees Levi he chases after him like a love-struck kid. Just when did Eren start looking at the corporal that way? He's never had that starry look in his eye when looking at her.

If admiration were the only reason Eren followed Levi around, she wouldn't mind so much. Levi is a man to admire. But it's not _just _admiration. She's not blind.

"You've fallen for him, haven't you?" she breathes out silently and she thinks she can feel her heart tearing inside her.

* * *

Levi is bent over with a foot propped up on the side of the bath undoing his buckles when Eren comes into the washroom. He pauses to look up at him. His eyes follow Eren's movements as he comes to stand right beside him.

"What do you want?" Levi demands. Eren's cheeks redden and he doesn't reply. A hand extends toward Levi. His fingers begin to undo the strap around his chest. Under his palm Levi's muscles are tense and he feels the quick pounding of his heart. Levi might appear composed but it's clear from the pace of his heart that he's not as calm as he seems.

"What are you doing?" Eren ignores this question too. The strap falls loose and hangs at Levi's shoulders. His hands move lower, skimming over Levi's hips to his legs and he resumes unfastening the buckle around his thigh—the same one Levi had been fiddling with before Eren had interrupted. His fingers slip under the strap and he pulls the buckle free.

"I asked you a question, Eren. What the hell are you doing?" Levi reels back a little when he sees the intense look in Eren's eye.

"Captain, how old are you?" Levi's eyebrows pull together at the invasive question.

"Too old for you to be toying with." Eren's fingers slide under the second strap at Levi's thigh and he tugs him closer so that Levi's leg hooks around his hip. He unfastens the buckle and the strap clatters to the floor. Eren's hand slithers higher up Levi's inner thigh and continues to shamelessly work higher until its almost unbearable for Eren to restrain himself.

Heat radiates off Eren's body in waves. Levi knows the meaning of it and the moment he gets too close, Levi palms his face. He shoves him away and Eren topples backward.

"Get out of here, you brat." But he's ignored again.

"Let's bathe together." Levi snorts and crosses his arms over his chest. He's beginning to wonder if Eren has a brain or if his head is just a hollow shell that uselessly sits on his shoulders.

"You're a pretty direct kid." And then he kicks him hard in the rear.

"Get your ass out of here." Once Eren is out of sight, Levi rolls his eyes and rubs his temple. That brat is getting close to crossing a line that should never be crossed. Levi will have to put an end to this quickly.

* * *

**Afterword: ...  
**

**Levi is such a badass. I really want to see him and Eren in his titan form tag-team against a whole bunch of titans. And... I want to see Eren throw Levi. I think that'd be cool.  
**

**Um, hope the adventuring wasn't too boring to read. This is the only chapter that will be of them..."adventuring". There will be more fighting but no more "adventuring". **

**And if you're still interested in this story... I wrote a lot more that was originally going to be a part of this chapter and I'm going to use it for the first half of the next chapter so it might be up soon...  
**


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's note: I was incredibly lazy this time. Didn't proofread and the syntax is monotonous and bland.  
**

**Beast Titan= ape-titan... you know, whatever it's called...**

**Playlist:**

**1. Great Escape (Music Box Version) by Cinema Staff**

**2. Guren no Yumiya (Lullaby Version) by Lizz**

**3. Everytime We Touch (Cover) by Alex Goot**

**4. Pandora Hearts OST: Parting Song**

**5. Ao no Exorcist OST: Exorcist Concerto Second Movement X**

* * *

It's early in the morning and Ymir and Historia sit outside watching the sunrise over the barren expanse of land in front of them. The world is an ugly place but somehow the two of them find beauty anyway. Ymir thinks that as long as Historia is around, there will always be something beautiful to look at. They split a piece of bread and Ymir is quick to take a bite out of the loaf but Historia does nothing but hold hers in a loose grip at her lap.

"What did Captain Levi mean when he said I was different?" she asks. Ymir's shoulders lurch with an unconcerned shrug.

"Dunno." And she takes another bite of her bread. It's almost gone now and Ymir is still hungry. Historia heaves a heavy sigh and her chin falls into her empty palm. Ymir snatches the neglected roll from her other hand and stuffs it into her mouth whole.

Once she gulps it down she grumbles, "If you keep sighing like that, I'll lose my appetite." Historia continues on as if Ymir hadn't spoken.

"And I want to know what I'm supposed to know that I don't know…"

"If that even made sense I wouldn't know what to say," is Ymir's snarky reply. Historia turns to her and those eyes are blinding, Ymir is forced to look away. It's difficult keeping up with someone as genuine and kindhearted as Historia.

"Hey Ymir…do you think everyone has a place in the world?" An exasperated sigh bursts from Ymir.

Historia flinches and squeezes her eyes shut when Ymir taps her on the forehead with her index finger and says, "You think too much."

"I don't think I have a place here…" Her bottom lip trembles and she quickly turns away so Ymir can't see her face.

"My whole life I was a burden to my family. I was always hated."

"If the people who are supposed to love me the most hate me…then why am I here? Why was I even born?" Ymir's mouth presses into a hard line and her eyes focus out over the horizon.

"I'm hated right now by everyone. I'm a titan and an enemy to humanity but what can I do?" And her remark is casual and light like she doesn't give a damn. A moment late she realizes that Historia's body is silently shaking. Her eyes widen and she grabs hold to Historia's petite shoulders to twist her around.

"Hey, are you crying?" Historia's flushed cheeks glisten with streaks from the tears that tumble down from her reddened eyes. Ymir stares at her in shock and then makes a 'tsk' sound against her teeth with a frown.

"Your crying face isn't pretty." Historia uses the side of her arm to wipe at her eyes.

"That's not nice. You're supposed to tell me that I'm pretty even when I'm crying." With gentleness that she shows only to Historia, Ymir takes her wrist and pulls it away from her face. Her fingertips brush the remaining tears from her long lashes then her palm slides from her damp cheek to her chin and with curled fingers, she tilts Historia's face upward.

"But then you wouldn't have a reason to stop crying now, would you?" Historia's eyes grow and Ymir cracks a small crooked smile. She leans down and softly pecks her on her small plush mouth. When she breaks away, Historia's tears have vanished and her round eyes are half-lidded.

"No more crying, okay? Even though your family didn't want you, I'll always need you. So stay with me." The only response Historia can manage is a little dazed nod of her head.

* * *

They're all sitting around a long worn table. They face each other and the atmosphere is tense. Reiner speaks first and there's an edge that cuts through the strain.

"Do you even have a clue why we attacked the walls?" There's a silence before Levi answers.

"You were scared." Reiner and Bertholdt glance at each other in surprise. Clearly the Lance Corporal knows more than he's let on.

"And we have good reason to be." Levi doesn't reply but his eyes lack any misunderstanding. He knows their reasons.

"Why are you afraid?" Eren questions feeling very much out of the loop.

"You still don't have a clue, Eren," Reiner sighs with a shake of his head. It's not like Eren can help that he doesn't know what's going on. No one tells him anything!

"There's one thing out there that's stronger than any of us."

"The beast titan," Mikasa mutters. Reiner, Bertholdt, and Ymir visibly stiffen and their faces contort with what Eren can only interpret as pure bone-chilling terror. But what is a beast titan?

"Huh?"

"It's a titan that towers over all others," Levi explains when no one else does. His tone is cool and detached as if he lacks any ability to feel fear. "Not much is known about it but there have been a few sightings just outside Wall Rose."

"I don't think you understand the power that titan has," Reiner says, eyes tapered toward Levi.

"Enlighten me." Bertholdt obliges him.

"The beast titan is tall and it's covered in hair much like an ape. But what's so disturbing about it is its ability to speak and its influence over other titans."

"What do you mean it can influence other titans?"

Reiner's eyes lock on Eren as he answers, "It can make other titans do its bidding. It's like the puppet master over all other titans."

"Even you," Mikasa says. Reiner and Bertholdt look at her but don't say anything.

Eren purses his lips, "Wait a minute, are you saying the reason you betrayed humanity is because you were controlled by that titan?" Levi scowls.

"Tch, no. They weren't controlled. They had a choice." Reiner winces as if Levi's words physically hurt him.

"You're right," Bertholdt says. "We were selfish. We wanted to _live_ so we did anything to survive even if it meant hundreds of others died because of it." Eren sees red. With flared nostrils and clenched teeth, he's on his feet and his hands slam against the table.

"Surviving at the cost of innocent lives? You call that living?" he bellows. "You get to live and people like my mother get to _die_?!" A soft fragile voice breaks him from his volatile rage.

"Eren…" his head snaps in Historia's direction. Wide sorrowful eyes that wring at his heart meet him. "I'm sorry for all that you've suffered through," and tears gather in the corners like she's about to cry from just the thought of Eren's pain. "But…can't you see? They're suffering too."

Eren's anger fades and he surveys Reiner and Bertholdt. They avoid his eyes and they both look tired and brittle like they'll break at any moment. She's right; it's painfully obvious that they're suffering. Eren looks down at Levi who has his arms crossed and is watching him with a deadpan from the corner of his eye. Then he looks at Mikasa whose eyes are tight and intense just like his own. He sighs and sits back down.

"I might not agree with your choices but I can't change the past. All I can do now is make choices that will affect my future. I don't know what the outcome will be but I've decided that I'll help you." Reiner and Bertholdt look up at him with identical masks of shock. Clearly that was the last thing they had expected Eren to say.

"We don't deserve your help…" Reiner mutters.

"You're right, you don't. But I'm not going to let the asshole that my mother died for, die too."

* * *

Bertholdt rubs a towel through his damp hair and drapes it over the back of his neck. Reiner is in his room, lounged on his bed as if he belongs there. Bertholdt sits next to him. He's known Reiner long enough to be able to tell when he's bothered by something. But he doesn't ask what's bothering him though; he doesn't say anything at all. Reiner will talk when he's ready.

"Why did we do it?" Bertholdt sighs. He's heard this question too many times to count.

He gives the same answer he's given over and over again, "To live." Reiner grimaces and he stares at his upturned hands in disgust as if they aren't a part of him.

"What Eren said is right. Why should we live at the cost of other lives?" Bertholdt closes his eyes. He doesn't like to see that agonized look on Reiner's face. It pains Bertholdt more and more each time it fixes there.

"You're thinking like a soldier again, Reiner. We're not soldiers, we're warriors. Our only purpose is to survive." What Reiner says next is the thing that Bertholdt fears the most.

"…What if I don't want to live like this anymore?" Bertholdt stiffens and can't bring himself to say, _I need you to keep living._ There's a lot he can't say to Reiner. And his mouth is full of painful canker sores from all the truths he's roughly bitten back. He takes Reiner's shoulder and gently turns him around to look into his anguish-stained eyes.

He utters in a voice low and brittle, "Didn't we agree that as long as we had each other, nothing else mattered? We'd keep fighting to survive. You, me, and Annie—even if the world hated us, we'd do whatever it took to keep living." Reiner's eyes fall and Bertholdt's heart follows.

"…I hate myself." Something inside Bertholdt shatters. _Please don't say that, it hurts_; another tally to the things he can't say. He doesn't trust himself to speak so all he can do is pathetically squeeze Reiner's shoulder and hope that it's enough to hold him together.

* * *

"We think the beast titan is also the reason for the existence for other titans."

"They were human once."

"Huh?" Eren stares at Bertholdt in shock. There's no way those monsters were once humans…they _eat _humans.

"Yeah, all of those titans you killed— they were once people just like you and me," Ymir says, and her tone is mocking and cheeky but Eren is too wound up in the new realization to be annoyed by it.

"But titan powers…they were created by scientist bastards," Reiner says. "When they realized that humans were being changed into titans, they wanted to see if they could accomplish the same. And _we_ were the test subjects." The image of that Military Police doctor flashes into Eren's mind and he involuntarily shivers.

"But that doesn't explain why Eren can transform," Mikasa quietly comments.

"That's right. He's _special_," Ymir dryly sneers with a bitter smirk.

"You got your titan power some other way." Reiner squares his shoulders to Eren with a firm look in his eye.

"And we want to know how you did it."

"I don't know. My father—" Eren reaches for the key around his throat and Reiner snatches it from out of Eren's hand.

"The key to your basement. There's gotta be something in there that'll clear up everything." Eren jerks the key from out of Reiner's hand and replaces it back under his shirt, out of sight.

"Yeah but there's no way of getting there."

"Our first move should be to take back Wall Maria and uncover the secrets hidden in Eren's basement. But we can't do it alone. Not even if the Military Police and Scouting Legion join forces will we have enough man power," Levi says. And then his sharp eyes home in on Bertholdt and Reiner.

"What we need is more _titan_ power."

"Are you asking for our help?" Levi shakes his head.

"No, I'm simply advising you to repay humanity for your betrayal."

"Even if we wanted to help you, the moment we set foot inside Wall Sina, we'll be blown to pieces."

"Who says you'll be going back to the inner wall with us? You'll meet us _outside_ the walls."

* * *

"Captain, how long have you known about Christa—uh, I mean Historia—and the beast titan?" Eren is sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at his fidgeting hands in his lap. Levi shrugs as he removes his jacket and hangs it on the back of a chair.

"I had my guesses," he pauses. "As for the beast titan, I read a few reports and they didn't make sense about some giant ape-like creature. Actually I thought it was a load of bullshit." Eren recalls the few nights Levi had stayed up late rereading the same report over and over again. He'd thought it was just a weird habit of his.

"I thought maybe it had something to do with the other titan shifters."

"Why didn't you tell me anything?" A heavy silence follows. It leaves a bitter taste in Eren's mouth.

"Why didn't you?" Levi won't look at him. Eren's eyes widen in disbelief and his heart beats faster as realization hits. His blood pressure rises and the anger that's always lurking inside him bubbles to the surface.

"You don't trust me." He's breathless as if he's just taken a blow to the gut. Levi's silence clears any doubt. He can't believe it. The corporal didn't actually believe in him. He was just like everyone else. For some reason this hurts more than it should. His hands ball into fists and his own nails dig into his palms.

"Why should I fight for those who don't believe in me?" he growls. The animalistic rasp in his voice is chilling even to his own ears. Levi looks at him and there is nothing there, no pity, no regret, no regard—if he feels anything at all for Eren it doesn't show. Finally he speaks and his voice is just as detached and dull as his expression.

"You really are an idiot sometimes." Eren is an idiot. Why hadn't he realized before? Levi has never trusted him with anything. He was always hiding the truth from him. He was always careful to have his barriers raised whenever Eren was around. Angry tears pull in the backs of Eren's eyes.

"I'm an idiot for ever believing in humanity. Humans like you are cruel." Levi scoffs.

"I am cruel, I'm only human, but Eren, you—" Levi's eyes widen as Eren leaps at him. He sidesteps the assault and kicks Eren's legs out from under him. He lands hard on his back but his pain is dulled by the blinding rage fueling him and he's quickly back on his feet again. There is no order or grace to his blows as he chaotically flings his fists at Levi.

"Stop it! Eren!"

For the first time since meeting Eren, Levi's heart quickens from fear of him and adrenaline pumps through his veins. Levi doesn't have his gear on and if Eren transforms, Levi won't be able to protect himself or save Eren from his own stupidity.

Eren grapples him around the waist and they fall. The breath is knocked out of Levi and the back of his head cracks against the ground. His vision blackens for a second and Eren's fist coils back. He hurls it forward and Levi twists to the side, narrowly missing the critical hit. Eren's knuckles meet wood and it cracks under the force. If that had been Levi's face, his skull surely would have been crushed. Levi kicks Eren off of him and slams him hard into the wall.

"Calm down!" Eren's entire body heaves with his quick breaths and his face is contorted into a hateful black glare but he doesn't move.

"I told you before, hear people out before you go and flip your shit!" Eren's glare disappears and his eyes widen.

"Huh?"

"I never said I didn't trust you, you little shit. I didn't tell you because it was case sensitive. I wasn't _allowed_ to tell you anything." A moment passes before the words impact Eren and then suddenly his hands are scrambling all over Levi and he looks like he's going to be sick.

"Ack! I'm so sorry! Did I hurt you?" Eren takes the sides of Levi's head and pulls him forward to inspect the back. "You hit your head pretty hard! Does it hurt?"

"Tch! As if you could actually injure me." Eren breathes out a sigh of relief and his head hangs in the space between Levi's neck and shoulder.

"I don't know what came over me. The thought of you…hating me, I couldn't think straight. I couldn't—"

"Just stop talking." He's giving Levi a headache with all these pointless apologies. Levi isn't going to say that he could never hate Eren because that would be a lie. If Eren ever really did lose control and betrayed humanity, he would kill him and he wouldn't think twice about it either.

"I'm sorry." There's a thick silence that weighs down on Eren's skin and his ears ring. The only sound he hears is Levi's quiet steady breathing. He slowly looks up and his eyes burn straight into Levi's. His hand moves on its own as he caresses the side of Levi's face. His thumb runs along his cheekbone and his eyes fall to the corporal's lips.

"For a moment there, I thought I was going to have to kill you," Levi mutters. Those lips draw in Eren and he tilts closer so that their faces are mere centimeters apart.

"Would you do it?" he quietly asks, feeling his own breath reflect off Levi's cheek.

"You know I would." Eren does know. He's never doubted Levi's ability to kill him. He depends on Levi in that way because if Eren did lose control, he wouldn't want to live as a monster for even a second. He needed Levi to be able to kill him.

Levi's tongue flicks over his lip, wetting it. And that's all Eren can endure. The distance between their faces closes. Levi's lips are warm and passive and he doesn't pull away but he isn't kissing him back either. Eren presses against him until Levi's lips part under the pressure.

When he catches onto his bottom lip, Eren is finally gratified with a response. It's a single, slight movement, a simple tilt of his head to the side that allows Eren better access. But that's all it takes for the flare of the all the pent up desire Eren has been keeping blaze through him and he's on top of Levi, straddling his hips between his knees, hands fervently roving from his chest to his stomach to his sides—every area he can reach. And Levi's breath hitches; Eren can feel it against his mouth. His hands scurry up the hem of his shirt and his palm meets hard muscle.

Eren forces Levi's mouth wider and reaches far inside but Levi turns his head, breaking off and silently sucks in a slow breath. Eren is too eager to even pause and give him a chance to breathe; his mouth is on Levi's jaw and then his neck. He feels the lurch of Levi's throat against his lips as he arcs his head back. His mouth trails further down to the base of his neck and he suckles at the soft flesh there.

"Don't you even think about leaving any marks," Levi warns. Eren grimaces, _whoops…_

"Sorry." Levi glares and Eren bends low to kiss him again. But it seems Levi is through, he presses against Eren's chest and gently pushes him away. Eren responds accordingly and gives him space.

His eyes are downcast as he says, "That's enough."

"S-sorry," Eren whispers. Levi looks at him for a moment and then sits up so that they're face to face. He tucks a finger under his chin and pulls his eyes to his. Eren meets his gaze curiously.

"Don't apologize unless you regret the choice you've made." Eren doesn't regret it. He wants more of Levi, he wants every piece of him, but he won't push Levi any further than he's willing to go.

"And even then, apologies are pointless." Eren gives a small smile and nods.

"Yes sir."

* * *

Levi is outside, lost in thought. He's not the kind of person to dwell on anything. In this world, dwelling only leads to insanity. But here he is, dwelling on that brat. Levi can't fall any deeper than this. If he does, he'll be breaking his role of a puppet. He decided long ago that he'd always live this way; he'd always do whatever Irvin wanted. But he can't obey orders _and_ care about Eren. The hairs on Levi's neck stand on end and he whips around. Mikasa stands completely still behind him, dark eyes rooted to him.

"What is it?" Her emotionless eyes continue to penetrate him until it's uncomfortable. Even so, Levi isn't the type of person to back down. He meets her dead pan head-on.

"I'm a tall person," Mikasa says slowly and Levi doesn't understand her intention. He knows this fact but it's a weird thing to say at such a time.

"So I don't know how a short person feels." She towers over him with a cold stare. "How does it feel?" Levi's eyes widen a fraction in disbelief. He doesn't get this girl but he does understand that she's trying to hassle him for a reason beyond him.

"…You," his eyes become narrow, "Are you trying to belittle me?"

"Not at all." Her unblinking impassive eyes are still fixed to him. "You're already little." They regard each other with identical masks of indifference.

"I admire your nerve." He starts to brush past her but pauses just at her side and speaks without looking at her.

"I don't know why you'd want to piss off a person like me but it'll take more than that to get under my skin." He resumes walking and doesn't look back.

* * *

Before they left, Eren had made sure to fulfill his promise.

_"Hey Reiner," Eren said as Levi and Mikasa mounted their horses. Reiner turned to him._

_"Yeah?" Eren flashed a dangerous grin. _

_"I've got something for you." Reiner eyed him curiously._

_"Really? What is it?" Then Eren slung a fist and hit him square in the jaw. Reiner whirled back from the force. He gaped at Eren in bewildered shock as he rubbed the bright red welt on his face. _

_"That's from Connie."_

Eren smiles at the memory. Reiner's face had been priceless and he'd been aching to hit one of them since they had betrayed them. The sting of his fist against Reiner's jaw had felt good.

The journey back seemed to take less time and it wasn't nearly as exciting or perilous. It was a nice breather after all that they've been through and they even have extra time as they approach the inner wall. Right as they step through the boundary, Jean is there to welcome them. He runs to them and Eren beams. He's never seen Jean in such a hurry to see him before. But when he comes closer he realizes that Jean's eyes are wide with panic.

"Eren! Mikasa!" he cries out breathlessly when he's made it to them. He bends over with his hands on his knees gasping for air.

"It's Armin…he's been arrested!" Mikasa's and Eren's jaws drop.

"What! What are the charges?"

"Rebelling against the government."

* * *

Eren bursts into the commander's room.

"Eren! You can't just barge in without knocking," Levi scolds, filing in right behind him with Mikasa. But Eren is too worked up to listen. Irvin isn't at all surprised to see Eren upset. He watches from behind his desk as Eren marches straight up to him and slams his hands on the desktop.

"Commander, what's the meaning of this? Why has Armin been arrested?"

"While you were away the female titan awoke." Silence reigns and the air is stiff.

"H-how?" Eren finally manages.

"We're not sure but we lost custody over her to the Biological Wing."

"What's that?"

"The doctor you met, he's the head of that department. They're a small, undisclosed branch. No one really knows what goes on behind their doors."

"But what does that have to do with Armin?" Mikasa questions.

"He refused to leave her in their hands and they arrested him for it."

"Make them release him!" A hand is at Eren's wrist.

"It's out of his control. He doesn't have that kind of power," Levi says with utter calm. It pisses Eren off. He angrily jerks out of Levi's hold.

"Fine, _I'll_ make them release him!" And he storms out with Mikasa at his heels. Levi clicks his tongue impatiently and crosses his arms.

"He's too reckless." Irvin rises and moves around his desk to stand at Levi's side.

"In this particular situation, he might have more influence than I do." Levi glances at him from the corner of his eye.

"What do you mean?" Irvin's eyes are on him and he has a strange look on his face. He doesn't answer Levi's question. Instead he asks one of his own.

"What is that?" He tugs at Levi's collar and exposes the purple mark on the side of his neck. Automatically, Levi's hand clamps over it and shields it from sight. Damn that stupid brat... He didn't think anyone could see the mark, it's small and faint. How did Irvin spot it?

"Who gave that to you?" Levi can't bring himself to look at Irvin directly.

"You make it sound like I asked for it," he mutters. At that Irvin's eyes harden and his expression darkens.

"You didn't want it?"

"Tch, the idiot was too eager." Irvin roughly holds onto Levi's shoulder.

"It was Eren?" Levi doesn't particularly like the way Irvin is acting. He's too rough and he sounds aggravated.

"What if it was? What would you do about it?" Irvin's jaw clinches tight.

"I'd have a little talk with him."

"Don't bother. I might not have wanted it but I didn't stop him either." Irvin's grip is tighter on Levi's shoulder, almost painfully so.

"You didn't stop him? Why not?" Levi can't reply. He doesn't know the answer. When silence is the only response, Irvin takes hold of Levi's arm and tugs him further into the room.

"Follow me." He's led directly through a small hallway that leads to a bedroom. Irvin pulls him inside and shuts the door behind them. The light is dim and for some reason the atmosphere is tense. Levi doesn't know why Irvin is acting so strangely and he doesn't understand why Irvin cares so much about such a small, trivial thing. It's not like him to react this strongly.

"Do you have feelings for Eren?" Levi grows stiff.

"You're saying some weird shit." Irvin takes Levi's chin and thrusts his face upward. But he's pulled too far and has to stretch onto his toes. It's uncomfortable.

"Answer my question." Levi glares.

"Of course I don't." Irvin's steel eyes don't ease.

"Prove it." Levi knocks Irvin's hand away and goes to head out the door. He doesn't want to put up with this bullshit.

"That's an order." Abruptly he stops mid-stride. More personal orders? Levi doesn't like this. He spins on his heel, a heavy dark glare contorting his face, and he deliberately marches up to Irvin and fists his shirt.

"Fine," he snaps. He yanks Irvin down to his level and kisses him hard on the mouth. For a moment, Irvin doesn't react and then as if something suddenly set fire inside him, Irvin knocks Levi into the wall and his tongue skims over his bottom lip. Instantly Levi's mouth grows wider, granting him entrance and Irvin indulges. Heat courses through Levi's entire body and his head swims. He wants Irvin. He's always wanted Irvin but why is he still dwelling?

Levi can't recall how, but they made it to the bed and Levi is in Irvin's lap, arms wrapped around his broad neck. His fingers tangle in soft blonde hair and he presses himself hard against Irvin, almost to the point of desperation. How long has he ached for this? When he breaks away for breath, Irvin guides him onto his back and fiddles with the belts to the gear that Levi is still wearing. Levi helps him remove the straps and buckles and then unbuttons his shirt. Irvin's strong hand slides under his back and gently lifts him off the sheets as his mouth makes burning trails down his torso.

"I'll make a mark in a place that no one will see," he murmurs into Levi's skin. The area warms pleasantly and Levi shivers at the husky, rasp in his voice. Quick fingers unbuckle Levi's trousers and slip them off his slender hips.

"Irvin…" Irvin's eyes meet Levi's and he senses the impending uncertainty. His rough palm cups Levi's cheek and he offers a small smile.

"Don't be afraid." Levi scoffs.

"I'm not afraid of anything."

Irvin chuckles and leans down to kiss him again but right before their lips meet he murmurs against Levi's mouth, "I know."

* * *

Eren goes to the place him and Levi had met Doctor for the first time. The two doors at opposite sides of the room loom forebodingly. He remembers Doctor appearing from the door at the right so he goes through that one. A long empty hallway greets him and he hurries down. The place makes him uneasy; it smells of death with blindingly white walls and tiles. His footsteps echo loudly and eerily. He has no clue where he's going and makes a random veer to the right and there are more doors. He picks one and slinks inside.

The room isn't a room at all but a jail cell and Armin sits cuffed inside.

"Armin!" Armin is slow to respond. He's bruised up and has a busted lip and his clothes are disheveled. Seeing Armin like this infuriates Eren. He'll definitely kill that doctor.

"Eren, you're back," he happily beams. Eren grips hard onto the rails.

"Yeah and you've been arrested. Why didn't you just let them take Annie?" Armin's pale blue eyes taper and his brow furrows.

"They'll torture her and who knows what else they'll do." Eren shakes his head. He should've known Armin would do anything to protect his friends, even those who've betrayed him.

"I'll get you out of there, no matter what." Armin smiles.

"I know you will," and he sounds more confident in Eren than Eren is in himself.

"Well, well, if it isn't my favorite titan boy." Eren whips around. Doctor is there with that disgustingly sweet grin.

"Let him go," Eren snarls. The doctor purses his lips.

"I would love to, really, but unfortunately he's a threat to my department." Eren's hands clench into fists and he has to keep himself from hurling them into this creep's face.

"No he isn't! He isn't a threat to anyone!" Doctor adjusts his glasses and hums thoughtfully.

"I see. You really care about him. In that case, I'll release him but on one condition." Eren calms down a bit.

"What is it?" Doctor leans in close and Eren falls back a step.

He takes hold of Eren's chin and says, "I'll release him only if you agree to become mine." Eren's eyes widen and his mouth runs dry.

"Become yours?" he stammers uncomfortably.

"Become my new project. Let me experiment on you." Eren isn't too keen on the idea of letting this man conduct experiments on him but in this way, he's like Armin. He'll do anything for his friends.

"Deal."

* * *

**Afterword: You can interpret Bertholdt's tidbit however you want. It could be Bertholdt x Reiner or not. Honestly I think he has a strong connection with both Reiner and Annie. **

**Don't be surprised if this story disappears. It's very likely that I'll end up deleting it. **


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's note: Okay, so maybe I should explain myself a little. The reason I was going to delete this story has to do with the kind of person I am. I don't like to keep anything and I hate everything I do. So after a while, I just want it gone. But I realize that this time, it'd be selfish of me to do that. So I'm not going to... I don't want to "stab" anyone in the heart or anything like that. **

**There was a review that really got to me so I'm going to respond on here. YB Fan: Thank you. You truly understand everything about my story and my intention behind every character. I was speechless when I read your review. I really appreciate what you wrote and it affected me more than I can ever express through words... And I really like Eren too. I'm happy you think he's in character. I really tried. **

**I would respond to every review but I don't think people care about that(?) I'm not sure since this is my first fanfic... I appreciate all of the reviews from the bottom of my heart. They mean the world to me. Thank you everyone. Really.**

**I think this chapter has a different feel to it than my other chapters. Maybe its because I felt different when writing it? I don't know. I'm really nervous to post it... ****_*hyperventilates*_**

**I changed a little bit so I posted it twice. SORRY **

* * *

**Playlist: Same as last chapter plus**

**Ao no Exorcist OST: Suite Fourth Movement AI **

* * *

Irvin's calloused hand pulls at one of Levi's knees and parts his legs, ducking low. His mouth is on the soft creamy skin of his inner thigh, warm wet tongue roving circles and lips nipping at muscle. Levi bends forward and his arms curl around Irvin's shoulders, fingers twisting in his hair. He lays his lips against Irvin's temple and Irvin's eyes flick to him without removing his mouth from Levi's skin. His teeth lightly graze at the soft flesh of his thigh and Levi twitches from the sensation.

It feels...good. Levi writhes and his breath is short. _Irvin… _He doesn't dare say his name out loud, it's not acceptable for a pawn, but inside his head, he repeats it over and over. And his hands feel every part of Irvin, every part of him that Levi has only imagined touching. He's disgusted with himself for how desperate he's acting. He hates himself for it. But he'll continue to let Irvin use him however he wants, even if it's merely physical pleasure that he wants. He knows Irvin has an iron heart, he knows Irvin won't hesitate to sacrifice him for humanity's sake. But he'll always follow him. He'll always stay by his side. He'll always…

Levi moans and he bites his tongue. He didn't mean to let that slip out. It wasn't loud and it was almost lost to the silence but Irvin perks up at the small sound anyway. And Levi's face heats up. Irvin removes his mouth from Levi's thigh, revealing the small patch of purpled skin and moves in to capture Levi's lips.

Levi clings to him and let's Irvin into all the places that are normally gated off. His hands work at Irvin's buttons and he peels his shirt down over his shoulders. His fingers meet a hard shoulder and travel down his strong arm and then the defined muscle suddenly tapers off into a nub. Levi sucks in a sharp breath through his teeth and pulls away. It isn't easy to forget Irvin's condition but Levi had been too swept away and in that moment, he had forgotten. Painful pressure swells in his chest.

He hasn't seen Irvin's injury up close so he leans forward, his face only centimeters away. It's a brutal injury. The flesh is jagged and Levi can see exactly where the teeth ripped through him. It had to have been agonizing and for him to have kept fighting in that condition is astonishing.

Levi's eyes are dark as he murmurs, "If I had been there this wouldn't have happened." Irvin is surprised. Levi isn't one to dwell and retain regrets but right then, there was a slight quiver in his voice that betrayed him.

"You were injured. You probably would've sustained a fatal wound in your state if you had been there." Levi's jaw clinches and he looks like he disagrees but he doesn't say anything. His lips gently press against what's left of Irvin's shoulder and Irvin cups the back of Levi's head and holds him there with Levi's warm cheek pressed against his mutilated body in an embrace. He can feel Levi's heart beat against his own chest, that's how close they are.

Levi doesn't move from out of the hold but his hands wander low. His fingers run along Irvin's waistband and slip underneath.

"Levi..." He is gentle and deliberate at the same time, movements strong but affectionate. And Irvin can't endure much of it. He's too good. He releases Levi's head and his fingers curl around his small shoulder. Levi tugs his pants down just below his hips in order to reach him better. And then he's straddling Irvin's legs as his skillful fingers work. Irvin's muscles are tense and his breathing short. His grip is tight on Levi's shoulder, fingers digging into the bone but if he feels any pain, it doesn't show. Levi looks at him with his incomprehensible eyes and watches as Irvin endures the impending release. And when Irvin is spent, Levi takes his own discarded shirt and wipes his hand clean on it.

"Irvin..." he hesitates and Irvin patiently waits, "…will you have me?" Irvin's eyes widen. Levi doesn't sound uncomfortable, in fact, his voice had been steady but Irvin knows it must've been difficult for him to say that out loud. It must have taken all of Levi's shame to ask such a question.

"Of course." And Levi moves in. He starts to adjust himself on top of Irvin but then Irvin holds his shoulder and stops him short.

"But not this night. Not yet." Levi silently looks away and pointedly avoids his eyes. Levi's face is shadowed so Irvin doesn't know what expression he wears but he does know Levi. And his words are probably a blow to his pride. Especially since Levi had to lower his ego to ask such a thing to begin with.

But the problem is Irvin hasn't forgotten that this all started due to an order he issued and he doesn't want Levi to give himself to him because he's acting as his pawn, because he's merely fulfilling an order. He wants Levi to come to him on his own. That's why he has to reject Levi's advance tonight. Now's not the right time. He gently pulls Levi's mouth to his and kisses him in a way that will hopefully clear any doubt Levi might be fostering inside of him.

* * *

Just where the hell is that brat? Levi hasn't seen him all day. Not even when he returned to their room in the dreadfully early hours of the morning, did he see Eren. He expected Eren to be fast asleep but he wasn't there. Levi shakes his head and tries not to think about it. Eren will return. He always does.

It's already in the afternoon and Levi is in their room, checking for the dozenth time to see if Eren is there. And he's not. So he swallows the sour taste in his mouth and soaks in the bath, shoving the thought of Eren to the very back of his mind. However when he returns to the bedroom, his eyes instinctively scan for that brat. But Levi is standing alone and the room feels strangely cold.

With slow numb fingers, he buttons his shirt as he inspects himself in the mirror. He has circles under his eyes and his skin appears oddly pale. At the sound of the door slowly creaking open, Levi's heart quirks and his head quickly snaps up. Instantly, a disappointed frown tugs at his mouth when he sees who it is.

"Eren isn't here, as you can see," he says, hard eyes returning to his reflection and he resumes buttoning his shirt.

Mikasa doesn't budge from the doorway with her arms crossed over her chest and an unreadable mask.

"I wasn't looking for Eren." Levi's brow twitches in irritation.

"If you came to patronize me, now's really not a good time," he warns. Mikasa's dark eyes flick away and her arms fall to her sides.

"…I'm not here to hassle you either," she mumbles. Levi eyes her curiously over his shoulder.

"Then why _are_ you here?" She steps inside and quietly shuts the door behind her.

"I know where Eren is…" and Levi is a little relieved. At least _someone_ knows where that idiot is. "But he's gotten himself into a bad situation and no matter what I say, he won't listen to me." Mikasa's eyes root to Levi's and there's a flash of something behind them but Levi doesn't know what.

"The only person he'll listen to is you." Levi doesn't visibly react.

"What kind of situation is he in?" he questions cynically.

"He's agreed to let the Biological Wing experiment on him." Levi's face darkens and his eyes become narrow.

"Why the hell would he do that?" he quietly growls out. Mikasa unleashes a heavy sigh and her firm, stony front crumbles. And suddenly she's just an ordinary girl who's simply upset about her precious friend's wellbeing.

"So they'd let Armin free." And her voice has a trill to it. Levi scowls and curses under his breath.

"Please…talk to him," she quietly says. Levi turns and approaches her. He doesn't say anything and she doesn't look at him but before he leaves, he rests a hand on her shoulder and gives it a light squeeze. Then he's gone.

* * *

"Channel the anger lurking inside you," a voice purrs into Eren's ear and he shivers.

"Let it consume you." The voice is low and hypnotizing and lures Eren into darkness.

"Don't control it. Just let go." Eren's body is lax and he falls further into the bottomless darkness calling to him. He doesn't know if that voice is still speaking to him and he's forgotten where he is. His mind is a blank and he doesn't hear anything at all except the beating of his own heart and the slow rushing sounds of his breath.

There's something or someone ahead of him. A shadow. When he gets closer he still doesn't know what it is but it speaks. And it's a familiar voice…

_…Think about the one thing that affects you the most._

Eren thinks. And he sees sharp unfathomable eyes. And then he sees his fist pounding into that face, skull shattering beneath his knuckles and he feels sick. Blood and gore stain his hand and he wants to scream.

_…you…hating me, I couldn't control myself. _

Eren sighs and his eyes crack open. Blindingly white walls greet him and Doctor's face looms over him.

"I can't do it. I'm just not angry right now." Eren is spread out on a hard metal table, wrists and ankles bound to the corners and Doctor sits beside him. He's straightened up and that sweet smile is on his face. It sends chills down Eren's spine because it has no trace of kindness to it—it's an unnerving look. Doctor's cold hand gently strokes Eren's cheek.

"You're always angry," he says. "It's who you are." Eren knows Doctor is right. His very soul is a kindle for hate and rage and violence. So why can't he control this titan power?

"Maybe it'll help if you unchain my wrists." Doctor chuckles.

"Is it painful?" Eren nods and Doctor's smile widens.

"Good. I want to test how quickly damage heals when inflicted to your human form." Eren's heart rate quickens and his entire body grows rigid as nervous sweat trickles down his back. He tries to swallow down the itch in his throat but his mouth is completely dry.

"My, you look scared. Does pain frighten you?"

"A little," he admits, eyes downcast. Doctor's mouth purses thoughtfully.

"Do you fear it the most?" Eren automatically shakes his head. No, pain isn't what he fears most.

"Pain will eventually fade, right? So that's not it." Doctor's head tilts to the side and a curious spark lights up his already bright eyes.

"What is your biggest fear then?" Eren isn't sure if telling Doctor his fears is smart. He doesn't trust this guy. He's a creep. But he does want to learn more about his titan shifting ability and he thinks Doctor may be able to help him with that. Hanji had helped him learn more about himself before and she wasn't even as informed as Doctor.

"Do you fear titans?" Doctor asks. Eren shakes his head.

"No, I was never afraid of titans…" he pauses and then slowly says, "But I _am_ afraid of what they can do to my friends." Doctor hums to himself.

"I see. Your deepest fear is losing the people you care about." Eren sighs.

"No…that's not it either." Doctor's thin eyebrows rise in surprise.

"Oh? Then what is it?" Eren doesn't meet Doctor's eyes and instead he stares at the white ceiling. It nauseatingly spins above him and gives him a headache.

"I'm afraid of myself. I'm afraid of what I can do…if I lose control. If I ever hurt the people I care about, I wouldn't be able to live with myself." That's why he doesn't understand Reiner, Bertholdt, and Annie. How can they still live when they've caused so much pain? Is surviving really that important?

"But in order to defeat the titans, you'll have to give up your humanity and give in to your rage. You can't fight who you are." Eren's jaw clinches tight. He knows this and when the time comes, he'll do exactly that. He has to. But he's still afraid. Doctor's hand cups his cheek again and he's so close that Eren can feel Doctor's breath against his face when he speaks.

"You're an intriguing specimen, Eren Jaeger."

* * *

Levi hurries to the room where that freak doctor had summoned him and Eren that one time. He's walking down the hall that leads to the room and freezes. Up ahead is a large, familiar man—someone he wants to desperately forget about. He fights the urge to turn and walk away because that would be cowardly of him so instead he keeps walking and pretends to not notice this man. He passes him and just as he thinks he's gone by unnoticed…

"Corporal Rivaille," Zacklay greets with professional detachment. Levi turns and gives a stiff salute.

"General." And then from the corner of his eye he sees another familiar face. His heart quirks for some reason and his feet automatically take him forward. Intense green eyes widen when they land on Levi and then they shift to the general standing next to him.

He looks confused but Levi disregards this and growls, "Where the hell have you been?" Eren scratches the back of his head uncomfortably and his eyes fall in shame. Good, Levi wants Eren to feel guilty.

"I was with Doctor," he replies. A short, vexed breath bursts from Levi's chest and he gets right up in Eren's face. Eren's eyes widen in shock and he holds up his hands defensively in front of him.

"Are you stupid?" he demands. "Don't let that whack-job experiment on you. Did you hear nothing your friends said?" Eren won't meet Levi's eye.

"That creep could easily be the one who created titan shifters. He could cause permanent damage to you."

"Are you worried about me?" Levi jolts from the question and then his face is wiped clean. He doesn't reply and for a long time Eren stares at him with a thoughtful look that's a little uncomfortable for Levi. Finally his eyes fall and he shrugs.

"It doesn't matter anyway. I'll do anything for my friends."

"You think your friends want this?" Eren lets out a low sigh and when he looks up to regard Levi, the intensity of his eyes is a bit duller.

"I've already given Doctor my word."

"Take it back then." Eren shakes his head and his jaw sets.

"I never go back on my word." Levi can tell Eren isn't going to bend on this and scoffs bitterly.

"Fine. I'll _make_ you take it back." At that Eren's expression hardens into a glare.

"You can't do that." Levi lazily rolls his head to the side with a deep chill in his harsh gaze.

"Wanna bet?" and his voice is just as merciless as his expression. A voice comes from behind Levi.

"Lance Corporal, the boy Armin has already been released. Eren is now in _my_ custody." Eren's gaze shifts to Doctor but Levi refuses to turn and look at the creep.

"Come Eren." And there's a flicker of hesitation in Eren's eyes before he brushes past Levi. For a moment Levi just stands there, feet rooted to the floor, eyes straight ahead as if he's been frozen in time. And then he whirls on his heel and starts to go after them. A heavy hand on his shoulder stops him.

"Let him go." Levi's head snaps up and he scowls at Irvin.

"No, he doesn't know what he's getting himself into." Levi shrugs off Irvin's hand and makes to go after them again.

"That's an order, Levi. Let him go." Levi's hands clench as he becomes still and he refuses to look at Irvin.

"Why? What good will come of this?"

"Doctor has a vast knowledge of titans and titan shifters. He may be able to help Eren control his titan without fail." Levi's fingers uncurl and his shoulders slump forward a fraction. He realizes Irvin has a point but…

"Will he make Eren suffer?" Irvin doesn't reply. It's clear that he doesn't know the answer.

"Progress can't be made without sacrifice." But they've all sacrificed so much for this war. What more can they give?

* * *

Eren has no energy as he crawls onto the bed and lies limp. His entire body wracks in agony. He feels like he's burning, it hurts to breathe. His eyes squeeze shut and he drifts off. He couldn't have been asleep for long because he still feels tired when something at his hairline tickles him and his eyes crack open. Levi is standing over him with an unreadable expression and his fingertips are brushing the tips of Eren's hair from out of his eyes. When he sees that Eren is awake, his hand falls loose at his side and he looks away.

"Captain?" And Eren's voice is just above a raspy whisper. He can't speak any louder than that. Is Levi still angry? Eren feels bad about leaving him before but he didn't have a choice. Levi regards him with a blank look.

"You look like shit." Eren's breath hitches as there's a painful stab in his side and he tries to lift himself onto his hands and knees but Levi settles a hand on his shoulder to keep him still.

"Don't overexert yourself. Know your limits."

"I just need a hot bath, I'll be fine," he says with a lighthearted grin. There's a long moment of silence before Levi speaks.

He gazes at the wall as he quietly mutters, "I'll wash your back for you." Shock is an understatement of the absolute astonishment he feels at Levi's offer.

"W-what?" Levi's stare is sharp as he meets Eren's wide eyes.

"Have those experiments affected your hearing?" Eren's face heats up.

"Eh, no," he stammers and then his eyes are downcast as he murmurs, "I'm just surprised. You've never wanted to bathe together before." Levi doesn't reply but he takes Eren's wrist and pulls him off the bed. Eren stumbles a little—he's still weak—so Levi wraps Eren's arm around his shoulders and carries most of his weight as he leads him to the washroom. He kicks the door open and helps Eren inside. He turns on the water and lets the bath fill.

"Sit down," he commands and Eren obediently takes a seat at the edge of the bath. Levi stands in front of him, between his two knobby knees and his hands are at the frayed hem of Eren's shirt.

"Lift your arms." Eren's breath is quick and heat envelopes him as his arms rise over his head. Levi pulls the shirt off and neatly folds it before placing it to the side. Next Levi squats lower and unbuckles Eren's trousers.

"C-captain," he squeaks out. If Levi continues, Eren won't be able to control himself. He already feels like his heart will give him internal bruising from how hard it bangs against his ribcage. Levi hesitates and his brows pull together.

"Are you uncomfortable?" Eren's eyes dart away.

"A little, yes," he confesses. Levi doesn't respond for a second and then he straightens up.

"I see. I'll give you privacy." And then he turns to leave. But before he can, Eren's hand shoots out and seizes his wrist.

"No…I mean… I'm nervous but I don't want you to go." Levi steps back between Eren's legs and he tucks a finger under Eren's chin. He tilts his face upward and silently looks into his eyes. Eren wonders what he's thinking and why he's being so gentle with him. It's not like Levi to act this way.

"You were pretty direct before but now you're nervous? Make up your goddamn mind." Well, Levi's touch might be gentle but his words are as harsh as ever.

"Sorry…please continue." Levi releases Eren's jaw and kneels in order to undo Eren's pants again. This time Eren doesn't object as Levi tugs them down and off his legs. He folds them just as he did with the shirt and places them aside.

Eren stares at Levi in wonder. Since when did Levi become considerate? Earlier, when Levi had caught him returning to the lab, the corporal had actually seemed concerned about him. It might not have been obvious but there was something in the way Levi looked at him that made Eren think that he actually cared. Eren had almost listened to Levi too. He had almost agreed to take back his word just so Levi wouldn't have to worry about him anymore.

But even though he wanted to please Levi, he couldn't bring himself to be dishonest with Doctor. Eren has always been an honest person and lying to Doctor now wouldn't sit well with him. And he's sorry. He doesn't like seeing that subtle worried look on the corporal's face. He wants to make it disappear. Levi shuts off the water and turns to Eren. He looks tired.

"The bath is filled. Stand up and I'll take off your underwear for you." Eren's face is unbearably hot and he wants to cover it with his hands. Why does the captain have to be so blunt with everything? Eren hears Levi sigh and he's pulled to his feet. Eren can't watch as Levi's fingers slip under the elastic of his undershorts and peels them off.

"Stop being embarrassed would you? You're making _me_ embarrassed."

"S-sorry," is Eren's breathless whisper. There's a tight grip on Eren's naked hip and he's thrust around so that he's facing the bath.

"Get in." After Eren is sitting, submerged to his chest in hot water, Levi rolls up his sleeves and takes the bar of soap sitting on the edge. He lathers his hands in it and gets to work on Eren's back. His hands aren't soft. They're scarred and calloused and they scratch at Eren's skin. But Eren's hands are the same—war-worn and all torn up. He wonders if all Scouts' hands are like that, they probably are since they've suffered through the same battle together. Eren's shoulders collapse with a deep sigh.

"You don't have to force yourself, Captain." Levi's hands stop working.

"Force myself?" Eren nods. Levi is only doing this out of pity. He feels sorry for Eren.

"You wouldn't willingly wash my back for me." Levi's silence confirms Eren's assumption and he hunches forward.

"I can wash myself," he mutters. "Don't worry about it." Eren hears Levi stand behind him and then there are quiet rustling noises. Feeling dejected, Eren doesn't really care what Levi is doing but glances over his shoulder anyway and then his eyes go wide at what he sees. Levi is pulling his shirt over his head and he discards it to the side. He unbuckles his pants and Eren's heart pounds at a pace much too quickly inside his chest.

"W-what are you doing?" Levi ignores him and drops his trousers. He kicks them off and finally looks at Eren with his arms folded in front of his chest. Eren can feel blood surge up to his face, all the way to the very tips of his ears and his mind whirls from the overwhelming rush.

"Are you going to stupidly stare or make room?" Eren immediately pulls forward and Levi steps into the bath behind him. His legs are bent on either side of Eren, hugging close to his body, the tops of his knees protruding just out of the water. His hands are on his back again and he kneads at Eren's strained muscles but Eren doesn't want a massage. He twists around and faces Levi. Levi's expression is blank as Eren stares at him.

"What is it?" Levi questions. Eren shakes his head and finally cracks a grin. His arms wrap around Levi and he pulls him close.

"Captain…" He thinks his heart might burst. He holds onto Levi tightly, so tightly that he feels Levi's joints creak and groan underneath his arms and he sucks in a pained hiss.

"That hurts, Eren." But Eren doesn't want to let him go. He never wants to let him go. Levi squirms.

"Oi, Eren, I'm not kidding. You're too strong." Eren sighs and his arms fall back into the water with a splash. He looks at Levi and takes in the flushed cheeks, the stringy hair, the small and defined shoulders…everything. He wants to etch it all into memory.

"Captain…you're being kind." Levi's brow twitches and his mouth presses into a hard line. Fingers wrap around Eren's hand and he pulls it out of the water. He pulls it close to his face and inspects it. It's the hand Eren uses to shift and there is a deep purple scar that runs along the bottom knuckle of his thumb. For some reason, it won't heal completely.

"Am I really that unbearable to be around?" Eren is shocked.

"No! Not at all! I mean, I always want to be with you. I always want to be by your side. I know it must be annoying taking care of a brat like me but I'm glad you've put up with it for so long." Immediately Eren is embarrassed. His confession just came out. He hadn't thought it through and now he realizes how stupid he must've sounded. Levi remains silent and Eren's gut squirms uncomfortably. Then Levi presses Eren's hand to his lips right over his scar and kisses it. Eren sucks in a startled breath.

"Then why have you left my side?" Something inside Eren snaps. He doesn't like the veer Levi's thoughts have taken. Does he really think Eren could ever truly leave him? Eren needs Levi. He can't live without him. Levi is the person who can curb his deepest fear. He's the _only_ person who has the ability to do that.

Without any warning, Eren's mouth is on Levi's, one hand pulling the back of his head and the other cupping the base of his neck. Levi's mouth opens wide and Eren is inside, desperately reaching every corner, every wet chasm. Levi's arms curl around his neck and he pulls him closer so that their chests are pressed together. Eren gasps when he feels Levi's teeth on his bottom lip. Eren can't control himself. He knocks Levi into the side of the bath and his hand slithers to parts of Levi that he knows oh too well in his dreams.

"Wait Eren, the purpose of a bath is to get clean, not get dirtier."

"I'm not waiting any longer." And Eren's voice is husky and fierce. Levi is taken by surprise. He's never heard Eren sound that way before. His eyes squeeze shut as Eren's hand is suddenly around him. His blood runs quick and his body heats up and his breath courses shallow and short through his parted lips. Eren's not very experienced, it's clear by his rough impatient movements but Levi is swept away anyhow. His hips twitch instinctively and Eren's mouth is on Levi's again.

"Captain…" And then Levi shudders and his rigid body relaxes against Eren. Eren holds him and relishes the feeling of Levi's small body propped against him as he nuzzles his cheek into the top of Levi's head.

"Gross. Now we have to take another bath," Levi grumbles irritably. Eren grins.

"Want me to wash your back?" The only response Levi gives is a short, irritated scoff and Eren isn't sure how to interpret that.

Tonight, Eren doesn't hesitate to wrap an arm around Levi as they sleep. And the surprises don't end. Levi turns over, facing Eren and drapes an arm over his hip. His face presses into Eren's chest and his eyes fall shut.

"I can hear your heart," he remarks, his breath warming the center of Eren's chest underneath his thin shirt. Eren flushes. His heart is beating too quickly and so he knows that Levi is aware of the state he's in but still, the corporal doesn't pull away and remains pressed against Eren.

"Thank you, Captain." No response but Eren is content that way.

* * *

Another morning without Eren and Levi won't admit that he's disappointed. He'd done everything he could to convince Eren to stay away from Doctor yesterday but that idiot sure is stubborn. He even went as far as letting that brat… He shakes the thought from his head. No reason in dwelling on it now. It's done and over with.

He sits alone in the dining hall, his chin propped in his hand and picks at a bread roll. Someone sits beside him and he doesn't really care who it is but glances up anyway. It's Hanji and she's wearing a wide smile while stuffing meat into her mouth.

"What's up, you old clean-freak?"

"Damn four eyes…" he grumbles. Hanji throws her head back and laughs.

"Wow, someone's in a foul mood." Levi looks at her from the corner of his eye.

"You're one to talk. Don't think you can fool me with that pathetic smile of yours." Hanji's smile doesn't fade, in fact it widens as she pushes her glasses further up her nose and tilts her head down.

"You've known me for too long." Levi snorts.

"I agree." And then they're silent.

"…Do you want me to act like I'm curious?" he asks after taking a small swig from his cup. Hanji nods.

"That would be nice." He sighs and turns his head to look her in the eye.

"What's wrong, Hanji? I truly want to know." Hanji smirks.

"Your performance wasn't too shabby. I almost believed you." And then she's off, mouth working a mile a minute and Levi has to work to keep up.

"I can't believe it! That stupid Biological Branch and their fancy equipment and extensive budget, just because they're undisclosed and top secret doesn't mean they can just steal MY sample! Eren has always been mine to study. He's under _your_ custody isn't he? That means he belongs to the Survey Corps and no one else! Even the general said so. Can they even disobey his ruling? Is that even legal? That's it! What they're doing is _illegal_. They should be arrested. We should arrest them, Levi. Let's go." And she's suddenly grappling his arm and pulling him away. Levi's mind is spinning. Everything happened too fast and it takes him a moment to catch up.

"Hanji, we can't arrest them. We don't have the authority." Hanji hesitates and finally lets go of his wrist.

"I know…but I don't like this." Levi crosses his arms and stares off at nothing in particular.

"And you think I do?" Hanji looks at him for a moment then she bends down to his level and becomes face to face with him. She's so close that he can see his own reflection in the lenses of her glasses.

"You care about him." Levi's brow twitches.

"He's my subordinate."

"He's your lover." Levi's eyes widen as he stiffens. He wants to deny it or at least say something but he can't find his tongue.

"It's okay, Levi. You don't have to run from your feelings all the time, you know." Levi's teeth clench and he glares.

"Who says I'm running?" Hanji offers a small smile.

"You've known me for a long time but I've known you for just as long." Levi clicks his tongue against his teeth and walks away. Hanji heaves a sigh, eyes lingering after him.

"But I wonder how much more of this running you can endure. Can't you see that you're not just a pawn?"

* * *

"Well, this is quite a surprise. What brings you here Corporal?" Zacklay had just exited the meeting chamber and found Corporal Rivaille casually propped against a marble column waiting for him.

"I have a question for you." And his face is a complete blank, his voice dull and steady. Zacklay can believe that he's indeed forgotten what transpired that night.

"Can you prevent the Biological Wing from experimenting on Eren?" The corners of Zacklay's mouth tug into an imperceptible smirk. He had seen Levi get all worked up over Jaeger and then his absolute obedience to Commander Smith. He really is a fascinating character.

"Unfortunately I don't have any power over their activities." Levi's jaw tightens. "But I may be able to speak with the president. There's a chance I could convince him to prohibit testing on Jaeger." Levi's eyes narrow in doubt.

"A _chance_? That's all?" Zacklay adjusts his glasses.

"Yes. I'm not as highhanded as you might imagine, Corporal." Levi is quiet for a moment, contemplating his next move, no doubt. When his sharp eyes focus on Zacklay again, there is a hard determination lining his brow.

"Will you talk to the president then?"

"I suppose so."

Levi is emotionless as he asks, "What do you want in return?" Zacklay smiles but it doesn't show behind his pristine beard.

"I may be a cruel man but I'm not unreasonable. You've already proven yourself. I'll speak with the president free of charge." Levi's eyes further taper in distrust.

"Besides, the Biological Wing is also a pain in my side. I don't want to see them get their way," he adds. Zacklay tilts his head respectfully and turns his back. "Good evening, Corporal Rivaille. It's always a pleasure." And then he walks off without another word.

* * *

**Afterword: I wanted to add that last scene with Zacklay just to mess with people. I'm sorry. I was definitely NOT going back into that but I wanted to trick you. Did it work? **

**Orginally I wasn't going to include the first part with Irvin and Levi, I was just going to leave it up to your imagination because I don't particularly like to write steamy scenes but then someone asked for it and I thought about it. I realized that just because I know what Irvin is thinking, you don't and there was something important about his thought process. So I ended up writing it out. Thanks to that reviewer lol. **

**This chapter was reeeeeeally difficult for me to write. Skinship just isn't my forte as you can tell and I tone it down as much as possible. I'm sorry if it's a disappointment but that's just the way I write.**

**This story is winding down just so you know. I think I know how I want to end it. Next chapter actually might be it (:**

**Also, because this fic drew in a few Erwin x Levi shippers I was inspired to start another fic that starts from when they first meet. During the night I suddenly thought up some stuff so I wrote it down. I posted the first chapter the other day and some people have already read it. It has nothing to do with this story but I just thought I'd let you know if anyone was curious. It's dedicated to the Erwin/Levi fans that I accidentally drew in. I felt a little guilty.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's note: I changed part of the beginning of last chapter so you might wanna check that out... I can't remember what I originally wrote anymore, but I know I didn't like it so I rewrote it. Actually, if you ever reread this story, you might notice small changes that I've made or things that I've added in all the chapters. They're all minor though.**

**You know, at first Levi wasn't at all my favorite character. I thought he looked weird... My favorite was Mikasa. I still really love her and I think her and Eren are adorable together. I didn't start liking Levi until this quote when they're running from the female titan "...choose whatever you'll regret the least." I really liked that. **

**Another chapter...and another potential heart attack. Geez, updating never gets any easier. **

* * *

"Mikasa, will you keep an eye on Eren?" Armin's pale blue eyes are on her and he sounds urgent. He had wanted to meet up and speak with her privately. They decided to meet just on the outskirts of the inner wall where MPs are scarce and wouldn't be watching them or possibly overhearing them.

"I will but you know something, don't you." Armin glances away and he has a faraway look in his eye.

"Well it's more or less a hunch or a gut feeling that I have."

"What is it?" Armin's brows pull together into a contemplative look as he explains.

"I don't think the Biological Wing was ever after Annie. They haven't touched her since she's awakened but they have their hands all over Eren. So I think they were always after him and saw their chance to trap him when Annie broke out." Mikasa's hands clench and her teeth grind together. She thinks Armin is right. It makes sense.

"I don't know what they want to do with him but I definitely don't think it's a good thing. Just watch him and take note of any changes you might see in him."

"Changes?" Armin nods.

"Watch for any effects the experiments have. Who knows what they're doing to him." Mikasa gives a single short nod.

"What're you going to do now?"

"I'm going to talk to Jean and gather everyone just in case." He flashes a warm smile that eases Mikasa's heart. "Eren has always enjoyed the company of his friends."

* * *

"I heard they're experimenting on that monster."

"They should just kill him. He's a threat to us all."

"Maybe _we_ should kill him. I've never killed a titan before." A few snickers.

"Yeah we could sneak up on him while he's still human and—"

"Now, doesn't that sound like fun." The group of MPs whirl around and gasp.

"C-corporal Rivaille!" Levi's face is an impassive blank as they stutter and stammer at the sight of humanity's strongest soldier.

"If you want to kill titans just come on a Scouting expedition with us. I'm sure that you'll really enjoy yourselves." The MPs stiffen and shift their weight and sweat beads at their hairlines. Levi watches them squirm for a moment longer before turning to walk away but he pauses to look over his shoulder and says one last thing.

"You say he's a monster but let me ask you something, what makes you think you're so goddamn human?" He waits for a reply but none of them can say anything. Levi turns back around and continues walking.

"Tch, damn pigs." None of them have a clue what Eren has sacrificed for them. He may resemble a monster and he may even act like one at times but he has a heart, he has a sense of humanity—he is just as human as the rest of these pathetic fools.

* * *

Eren's arms are around Levi and he has him pressed close to his body, he feels small and unbreakable at the same time. Levi rests his chin in the space of Eren's shoulder and he breathes in slowly. The hairs on Eren's arms stand on end at the feeling of Levi's warm breath ghosting his cheek.

"Eren," he breathes into his ear. A tremor works up Eren's spine but somehow he manages to ignore it.

"Y-yes?" he barely chokes out.

"What is your deepest fear?" And Levi's voice is low and sensual—it makes Eren's entire body heat up. Eren's hands slide up the back of Levi's shirt and he palms his bare skin. He feels hard muscle and a rutted spine and then sharp shoulder blades.

"Tell me yours first," he murmurs back.

"I'm not afraid of anything." Eren chuckles.

"That can't be true. Everyone fears something." And he pulls Levi away from him to look into his silvery blue eyes.

"Not me." Levi's head tilts to the side and he leans forward. Eren watches as Levi's eyelids fall. Their mouths mold together like its second nature. And Eren can taste Levi's very essence on his tongue—he has a spicy taste, Eren can't get enough of it. He reaches far into him. There's a low moan building in Levi's throat, Eren can hear it. He cups the base of Levi's neck and his fingers tangle in his hair. Then his strong fingers curl, yanking on the strands and his nails scrape into his flesh. Levi hisses.

"That hurts, Eren." But Eren doesn't stop. He jerks Levi's head to the side, there's a sickening snap, and then there's a lifeless body in Eren's lap.

_Don't control it._

Eren jolts awake. Doctor's face is mere centimeters away. Eren's heart pounds in his ears and his head feels like it's going to rupture from all the pressure that is inflated inside of his skull. Sweat sheets his face, he's cold all over, and his chest heaves with shallow, chaotic breaths. Burning bile surges up his throat so he turns over and dry heaves. Nothing comes out because he has an empty stomach. For the past few days, Eren hasn't been eating—he's been too queasy to even try to nibble on bread.

"Ugh…" he groans as he collapses against the table.

"Oh, did you have a nightmare again?" The only reply Eren can manage is a shaky nod of his head.

"What happened this time?" After taking in a deep breath and forcing himself to calm down, Eren chokes out a breathy answer.

"It's always the same. It starts out nice. I'm with the captain and everything is fine but then suddenly I lose myself and I…" He swallows. Eren can't say it.

"You kill him." Eren's eyes clamp shut. He doesn't want to have these dreams anymore. Each time they take away a piece of him and he feels like he's falling apart. He's not sure how much more he can take. There's an ever-growing hole in his chest.

"These dreams might not be pleasant but they're not a bad thing. In order to fully comprehend your power, you have to give up on your humanity and all that connects you to it—your compassion, your past, and most importantly the people close to you. These dreams just symbolize your growing detachment from the Corporal." Eren grits his teeth. He doesn't want to separate himself from Levi.

"You'll have to give up on the people close to you."

"I don't think I can do that." He doesn't _want_ to do that. The people close to him are everything to him.

"You'll have to sacrifice what you care about the most to take down all the titans." Eren sighs. Doctor is right. He'll have to give up parts of himself to truly become the monster that will be able to save them all.

* * *

The problem isn't that Levi has been making surprise visits to Irvin's room during the night. Irvin doesn't mind that. But it isn't every night that he visits and when he does come, he merely lies down on the left side of the bed, curls up, and falls asleep. That's not the problem either. The problem is that Irvin has realized there's a pattern to Levi's visits—he only comes to Irvin's room when Eren spends the night in the lab, which can only mean Levi is using Irvin as a replacement for his usual sleeping partner. And in the morning, Levi disappears before Irvin wakes up as if he's only a ghost of a memory. This is also a problem and it's slightly irritating.

It must be one of those nights Eren is kept late in the lab because Levi quietly slips into Irvin's room and automatically goes to the left side of the bed. The mattress dips a little with his added weight as he lies down. He curls up facing away from Irvin and pulls the sheets high over his shoulder. It's quiet but Levi is too rigid to be sleeping.

"Hey Irvin…"

"Yes?"

"Give me your hand." Irvin reaches over Levi's body and sets his hand in front of him. Lithe fingers wrap around his wrist and Levi secures Irvin's arm tightly around his slender waist, pulling him right up against his back. Levi is so small against him that Irvin's large frame practically swallows him whole. A deep sigh comes from Irvin.

"What are you thinking, Levi?" and he sounds defeated. He's tried to understand his corporal but lately it seems like he doesn't know this man at all.

"You mean right now?"

"Yes, right at this moment. What's going through your mind?" Levi hesitates.

"…You don't want to know what I'm thinking." A scoff bursts from Irvin's chest.

"I always want to know what you're thinking." Levi turns over. The darkness shrouds his face and all Irvin can make out are the tiny specks of dying candlelight that glisten off his irises.

"Irvin…" Irvin doesn't know why Levi says his name like that—barely audible and brittle almost like he…

Irvin cups the side of Levi's strong jaw and kisses him. Levi stiffens a little in surprise before melting into it and he kisses back with the same quiet brittleness that his voice has. Irvin roughly breaks off and turns over on his side, away from Levi. For a moment there is no movement but then Levi slowly wraps an arm around Irvin and nestles his head between Irvin's shoulder blades.

In the morning, when Irvin wakes, he isn't surprised to see Levi gone and the space where he had been sleeping lacks any heat—just a ghost of a memory.

* * *

Eren feels the bed shift but he's too tired to open his eyes. His eyelids feel heavy like the force of gravity is pinpointed to just his eyes.

"I brought you breakfast."

Levi hadn't been here when Eren first arrived, which couldn't have been too long ago because Eren's body is still sore from being in the lab. The experiments mainly consist of psychological tests but Doctor also likes to test Eren's strength and his regeneration rate. Shifting into a titan, however, has been impossible for some reason. He can't transform and it's beginning to frustrate Doctor. Eren thinks it's because he doesn't have a set goal in mind when he tries to shift. Transforming for the sole purpose of experimentation isn't a good enough reason. Well, at least, that's what Eren thinks. He's not really sure about anything when it comes to his titan power. He's pretty much just as clueless as he was in the beginning. Eren grunts as he turns over and forces himself to look at Levi.

"Where were you earlier?" he cracks. Levi's eyes are diverted away from him as he replies.

"Getting breakfast, like I said." Eren fails to keep his eyes open any longer. They fall shut and he hovers in a state just on the verge of consciousness.

"…But…your side…" he pauses. What was he saying? His mind is hazy. "…your side of the bed…" Another pause. "…it was cold." Yeah, Levi's side of the bed was cold when he got here. Eren's eyes snap open and they taper at Levi accusingly. He suddenly feels awake now.

"You weren't here at all last night, were you?" Levi snorts.

"Neither were you." Eren sits up.

"Yeah but I was with Doctor. Where were you?" There's an impatient twitch at Levi's brow.

"Just eat your goddamn breakfast." And he shoves the bread and cheese at Eren. Levi is avoiding the question and that annoys Eren. The last time Levi disappeared without telling Eren where he was, he had acted strangely afterward. Eren doesn't want to go through that a second time.

"Were you doing something for the commander again?"

"You ask too many questions." Eren sighs. He's frustrated but there's nothing he can do. Levi obviously isn't going to tell him anything…as usual. Eren takes the food and halfheartedly nibbles on the cheese. At the moment, he doesn't feel nauseous. And he thinks it's probably because Levi is with him. Just Levi's presence sets Eren at ease. He'd only taken a few bites when suddenly Levi snatches Eren's hand.

"…What did you do?" At first Eren doesn't understand the question. Then he notices that Levi's eyes are locked on his fingers. His hand is bandaged and blood has seeped through the wrappings so it's a pretty deep gash. Levi's eyes narrow and the corner of his mouth pulls down into a deep disapproving frown.

"Is he forcing you to hurt yourself?" Eren gives him a small reassuring smile as he gently pulls his hand from out of Levi's grasp.

"It's okay. It'll be helpful in the end, right?" Levi looks at him with a strange expression and Eren doesn't know what it means.

"I told you before, know your limits."

"Well I want to annihilate the titans as soon as I can so I have to learn to control my ability quickly."

For a moment Levi doesn't say anything and then, "…You're still an idiot." And he cups the back of Eren's head, pulling him directly to his face. He lands a kiss hard on his mouth. It's so forceful that Eren is sure that his lips are bruised. The kiss ends as quickly as it started and Eren aches for more but is too shocked to move. He gapes at Levi in a stunned daze, eyes half-lidded and cheeks heated.

"What a sloppy look," grumbles Levi. _Sloppy?_ Eren wipes away whatever expression he'd been wearing and focuses his attention as he really looks at Levi. He hadn't noticed before but the corporal appears tired and there are tight lines at the corners of his mouth.

"Is something bothering you? You've seemed off lately…" Levi shrugs and his eyes flick to the side at nothing in particular.

"Who knows." Eren wracks his brain for a possibility for Levi's change in behavior and he can only come up with one.

"Is it the commander?" Levi's brows furrow together and his eyes flip back to Eren.

"What does Irvin have to do with anything?" Eren forces a sheepish smile and shifts uncomfortably.

"I didn't say anything because it's not really my place to ask questions…but I've noticed you and the commander are pretty close. And whenever you leave, you normally go to him. I'm not exactly sure what kind of relationship you two have. I can only guess…But you're less aggressive when he's around. You almost seem content."

Eren doesn't want to look at Levi. He doesn't want to see his expression because he's afraid that he'll be infuriated by what he's said. But Eren is only being honest. If Levi wants to be with Irvin and only toy with Eren on the side, he'd be okay with that. After all, just having even a piece of Levi is more than enough to make Eren happy. After minutes of silence pass and Levi hasn't responded, Eren looks at him.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that."

Levi doesn't look at him as he says, "Irvin is cold, even colder than I am." And Eren wants to tell Levi that he isn't as cold as he thinks he is but Levi isn't through speaking.

"I'm merely his pawn." Eren bites his lip. He feels bad about bringing up the commander now. He's never seen such a pained look on the corporal's face.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring up any bad thoughts or anything."

Levi turns a cheek and with a dismissive wave of his hand he says, "Forget it." But there's something that Eren is itching to know. It's killing him and before he can bite back the question, it comes out.

"Are you sleeping with him?" he blurts. Levi whirls. His eyes are widened as he stares at Eren as if he can't believe the audacity of the question.

"And I thought I was blunt. You give a new meaning to the word." Eren ignores this and waits expectantly for an answer. Finally, Levi scoffs.

"It's really none of your business but I do feel like I owe you something so no." Eren blinks.

"No…?" And Levi growls impatiently.

"No, he's not fucking me, you little shit." Eren flushes bright red at Levi's foul mouth but he's also relieved. There's no way Eren would be able to compete with someone like the commander. The commander probably has more experience and he's known Levi much longer than Eren has. And for most of Eren's life, Eren was simply an admirer of "Humanity's Strongest Soldier". Eren was a kid then and he's still just a brat. But if Commander Irvin and Levi aren't sleeping together, then maybe Eren still has a chance. Levi rubs his temple with his thumb and forefinger like he has a headache.

"I never thought I'd discuss my sex life with a kid."

"Am I just a kid to you?" Levi looks up at him with wearied eyes.

"What are you going on about now?" and he sounds just as withered as he looks. Eren moves closer to Levi and runs the back of his knuckles over the length of Levi's cheekbone.

"I don't want to be just a kid in your eyes." Levi doesn't respond and Eren turns firm. He _will_ get a response from Levi. He takes Levi's face in his hands and his eyes burn straight into his jaded gaze then he mashes his mouth over top. Levi is still impassive as Eren's lips catch onto his mouth so Eren forces him onto his back and presses into him so hard that their teeth knock together. He doesn't understand Levi at all. Eren doesn't believe that Levi is the kind of person who toys with others. He doesn't _want_ to believe that Levi is only toying with him. Levi turns away and sucks in a breath.

"You're being too rough." Eren's mouth is on Levi's neck, making trails up and down the arc of his throat. Levi swallows—Eren can feel the lurch under his lips. His tongue laps at a spot on the side of his neck and he feels Levi's body shiver beneath him. There's a gasp when Eren's hand is suddenly down the front of Levi's slacks, then a glare and a curl of Levi's upper lip into a snarl.

"If you're trying to prove to me that you're not just a kid, it's not working," he snaps. Eren grips him and watches as Levi's eyes squeeze shut.

"You're being childish," he spits through his teeth as he fights his body's reaction to Eren's touch. And then there's a piercing pain inside Eren's head and he claws at the side of his face. It hurts… He hunches over, jaw clinched tight in an attempt to keep the pain at bay but it's quickly brimming over.

"Eren?" He barely hears Levi through the more prominent voice that reverberates off the walls of his cranium.

_Give up on the people close to you._

Eren turns away and he's on his feet.

"I have to go." He bolts to the door but there's a strong hold on his wrist and he's forcibly yanked backward. He tumbles back onto the bed and Levi looms over him.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Levi isn't glaring at him anymore but he doesn't appear kind either.

"It's nothing."

"You're a horrible liar." Then Levi is kissing him and Eren doesn't even stand a chance, he's completely swept away. All the pain and all the fears fade and all he can think about is Levi. He feels light and his body is boneless. Soon, Levi breaks away to say something.

"You're not just a kid, alright? You don't have to prove anything." A smile makes its way on Eren's face and his chest swells until it hurts.

"Thank you Captain." Levi's jaw visibly tightens but he doesn't say anything more.

* * *

Irvin is standing in front of the mirror, shirtless when Levi enters. Levi freezes at the doorway and Irvin waits patiently for him to say something. But as more time passes, he realizes Levi isn't going to be the one to break the ice.

"You're still angry." Levi doesn't reply. Irvin knows Levi is still angry with him for ordering him to let Eren be experimented on. Irvin slips his arm through the sleeve of his shirt and when he struggles to button it together Levi is there, swiftly pulling the buttons through the appropriate slits.

"Don't you trust me?" Levi's brows twitch and his hands slide down the front of Irvin's shirt to fall loosely at his sides.

"You know the answer to that." And he gazes up at Irvin with his sharp eyes.

"It's not you that I don't trust, it's those wack-job scientists." Irvin is silent for a moment.

"What is your relationship with Eren?" Levi shoots Irvin a tapered irritated look.

"He's my subordinate."

"Do you hold feelings for him?" Levi's jaw muscles flex.

"I've already told you the answer to that." Irvin's eyes are narrow as he regards Levi, easily seeing every crack and fault in Levi's front.

"You've been at my side too long to be able to successfully lie to me."

Levi mumbles something incomprehensible under his breath then, "Even if I did care for that little shit, it doesn't matter."

"And why's that?" Levi's impenetrable eyes bore straight into Irvin. His face doesn't reveal any of his thoughts or feelings, it's a cold deadpan but Irvin has known Levi for too long.

"You've devoted yourself to me, is that why?" A flint of some kind of reaction pulls at Levi's brow and then suddenly his hands are at Irvin's chest again with his fingers curled into the fabric of his shirt, clutching onto him like a lifeline. His head rests against the middle of Irvin's chest and Irvin's breath hitches. Levi can always affect him without even realizing it. Irvin runs his fingers through the hair on the top of his head.

"You insist on shutting me out. I don't know how to get through to you." Levi is silent but he can feel his fingers hold tighter to him.

"I order you to show me what you want." At first Levi doesn't move and then slowly his arms sling around Irvin's broad neck and he stretches onto his toes to press his mouth against Irvin's. Irvin bends a little lower to meet him and relish in everything Levi has to give. He thought he wouldn't give Levi any more of these orders but the only time Levi ever opens up is when Irvin orders him to. Otherwise, he's completely cut off. So if ordering him around is the only way he can get to Levi, so be it. He guides Levi to the bed and Irvin lies down with Levi on top of him.

Levi's mouth is all over Irvin—his jaw, his throat, his collarbone, every place that he can reach. His lips practically gnaw at Irvin's flesh as if he were devouring him piece by piece. And Levi wants _all_ of Irvin.

"Levi…" Levi silences him with his tongue on the inside of Irvin's teeth. Irvin's hand is up Levi's shirt and Levi quickly sheds it. He's pulling at Irvin's shirt too but he's too rough and accidentally rips off a few buttons. There's a fire inside Levi and it blazes through him uncontrollably. He _needs_ Irvin, now, because he can't control these thoughts anymore. His quick fingers undo Irvin's pants and he's pulling them off. _Irvin…_

He takes him in, his tongue roving him and tasting him. Irvin's muscles are tense and his brows are pulled together in a hardline mask and his fingers curl in Levi's hair as he guides him through the motions. This is what Irvin feels like, this is what he tastes like.

"Levi…I can't take much more." Good, Levi wants Irvin to be overwhelmed. He wants to be the one to overwhelm him. And then there's a guttural sound from deep within Irvin and his entire body tightens. It's hot and salty on Levi's tongue and he swallows without any hesitation.

Levi thinks Irvin needs a moment to catch his breath so he pauses as he takes the time to memorize Irvin's tightened face. But Levi underestimated his stamina and suddenly the tables turn and Irvin is the one on top. Unlike Levi, Irvin's touch isn't desperate; it's controlled and overpoweringly affectionate and each area that he caresses tingles with electric heat. Irvin's mouth trails down Levi's throat to his chest and Levi bites his lip in an attempt to keep himself quiet.

"You don't have to hold back." But Levi does have to restrain himself. If he doesn't keep himself in check, he'll lose control and he doesn't want to see the pathetically desperate side of himself that he's tried so hard to keep hidden away. He doesn't even know what he's doing anymore. His mind is a jumbled mess and the more Irvin consumes him, the more Levi loses himself. Irvin…

His chest swells with pressure and he's rigid and tense and his heart is shot. And even though he feels large, coarse hands all over his body and hears a deep, rumbling voice, all he sees behind his shut eyelids are green intense eyes. He's still fucking dwelling. Even after all this, even through his desperation for Irvin, he can't get that brat out of his head. And Levi is doing everything to make that happen. He _can't_ let himself fall. It's not the role of a pawn. Levi sucks in a breath and his voice is building in the back of his throat. It's going to burst out of him. His lip cracks from his incisors and he tastes a drop of blood. _Irvin…Irvin…_ He repeats his name over and over. _Irvin…_ The name isn't a name anymore; it's become a nonsensical word. _Irvin…_ His mouth opens and—

"—Eren." _No…_ _What the fuck is he doing? _His eyes snap open and his heart stops. Irvin is staring at him, completely frozen. His lips are pressed together in a hard line but other than that, he wears no other expression. Levi has lost his tongue. He doesn't know what to say. There's nothing he can say. He can't even apologize because apologies are pointless. So he recoils and snatches his shirt from the floor before leaving without another word. He's a fuck up and a coward. That's what he is. Hanji was right. He's running and he doesn't know how to stop.

* * *

Eren is let out early from testing and decides to see Mikasa. They're outside and Eren feels like he hasn't enjoyed the outdoors in a long time. He's always cooped up in that lab. They're sitting in the grass, propped against a tree and the sky is blue and everything seems right. But Mikasa keeps eyeing him as if he might suddenly combust or something.

"How are you feeling?" Eren shoots her an ear-to-ear grin.

"I feel better than I have in a long time." That suspicious look disappears and Mikasa's cheeks are pink as she returns his smile.

"I'm glad."

"How is everyone? It seems like I haven't heard from them in a while." Mikasa curls her legs against her chest.

"To be honest, everyone is worried about you. They don't like that you're being experimented on like some kind of lab rat."

"I'll be okay. I promise." Mikasa takes his hand and holds it between her warm, soft palms.

"I'll protect you," she murmurs in a low, tender way.

Eren stares at her in wonder for a moment before he says, "I can take care of myself you know." Mikasa nods.

"I know. Just let me help you every once in a while, okay?" She gives a small, heartrending smile that Eren doesn't get. Mikasa needs Eren to need her but she also understands that _he_ needs somebody else that isn't her.

"How is Levi?" Eren eyes her curiously.

"It's not like you to ask about the corporal." Mikasa's shoulders lurch with a shrug and she doesn't explain. Eren tugs at blades of grass between his fingers as his eyes scan over the horizon.

"I don't get to see him as often because of the testing and…I don't feel comfortable around him anymore." Mikasa's eyes flash but Eren doesn't notice.

"Why not?" His head ducks low and his eyes fall to the ground.

"I…just…" Eren doesn't know how to explain it. He feels like he's betraying Levi because of the dreams he's been having about him. How can he face the person that he constantly kills every time he falls asleep? It makes him sick to his stomach just thinking about facing Levi and it hurts too. Being away from Levi is just as painful as facing him. He doesn't know what he should do. Mikasa's arms are suddenly around him and she's embracing him. She feels fragile, which is strange because Mikasa is far from breakable.

"You need to go to him, Eren. You're unhappy when he's not around."

"What are you saying?" Mikasa pulls away and looks into his eyes. For some reason, Mikasa's eyes are glassy.

"You need him." Her hand is on his cheek and she smiles.

"So go." Eren nods in a daze and he stands. He's walking away but turns over his shoulder to look at Mikasa one last time. Her knees are pulled to her chest and her muffler is high over her chin and her head hangs. She looks…sad.

"Mikasa," he calls. And when she looks up at him, Eren beams. "Thank you for everything."

* * *

Levi is on Eren's side of the bed, hugging tightly onto a pillow. He looks cute and small like that, not that Eren could ever actually say that. Eren crawls over him and kisses his temple. Levi stirs.

"What?" he grumbles.

"You're sleeping on my side," Eren murmurs with a smirk. Levi sighs.

"Just switch for tonight then."

"I like my side."

"Little…shit…such a pain…" He starts to move over but Eren stops him.

"We can share my side." And he lies right up against Levi's back, knees tucked behind his knees. Eren's breath reflects off the back of Levi's neck and a tremor works up Levi's spine.

"…What was that, Captain?" Levi's body is stiff next to him.

"Are you cold?" Eren wraps an arm around his waist and pulls him closer. He burrows his face into the back of Levi's neck and presses his lips in a feather light peck on the side.

"Captain…" he whispers and Eren can see the hairs on the back of Levi's neck prickle.

"Am I affecting you?" Levi scoffs.

"Are you trying to seduce me? Because it's a pretty pathetic attempt." Eren chuckles, not at all affected by Levi's insult.

"Then why are you reacting?" Levi's body is hot. It radiates waves of heat like a furnace. Eren's hand slinks up the front of Levi's shirt and he presses his palm against his hard muscle. Then his scarred palm slides to a sharp hipbone and his fingers tease with the elastic of Levi's slacks. Eren can hear Levi's breath come out short.

"You're sensitive right now."

"I'm just tired, that's all." That didn't even make sense. If he was tired, wouldn't he be less sensitive? Eren's hand wanders down between Levi's legs. He shudders again and Eren is surprised by what he feels beneath the cloth of Levi's slacks.

"You're already—"

"Shut up." Something in Eren's mind clicks and his heart sinks.

"Wait, were you with the commander earlier?" Levi doesn't reply.

"Were you? Is that why you're reacting?" Eren insists again, propping himself on his elbow to look at Levi's face. His eyes are dull and impassive.

"What if it is?" His voice is detached and cold. A disappointed sigh comes from Eren as he rolls onto his back, tossing his eyes up to the ceiling. There's no way he can compete with the commander.

"Then go back to him. You don't have to stay here." And he sounds bitter, even to his own ears. Levi sighs.

"I can't."

"Yes you can. You don't have to babysit me anymore," he mutters. Levi growls irritably. He sits up and twists around to glare at Eren.

"You don't get it. I can't go back to Irvin because I don't _want_ to go back to him." Eren's brows furrow. He doesn't understand. Did they have a fight or something?

"What do you mean?" Levi takes Eren's hand and mashes his palm against his chest. Eren can feel the hammering of Levi's heart inside of him.

"If I wanted to be with Irvin, I wouldn't be here right now. And the reason I'm reacting isn't because I was with him, it's because of you, goddammit. I can't get _you_ out of my fucking head and it pisses me off." Eren is shocked. He can't find his voice and he can't move, all he can do is senselessly gape at Levi in utter bewilderment.

"Is that clear enough or are you still confused?" This was the last thing Eren ever expected to come from Levi.

"Was that possibly…a confession?"

"Call it what you want."

"Well, that was probably the harshest confession I've ever heard." Levi's face darkens.

"Don't complain, I'm not a romantic," he snaps.

"No kidding." But that's Levi. He's harsh, rude, foul, and violent—he's a heartless bastard who isn't actually all that heartless. And he's the only person who can drive Eren up the wall and make him feel completely secure at the same time.

Eren leans over Levi and kisses him. Strong but small arms wind around his neck and fingers tangle in his hair. It's different this time. Knowing how Levi really feels, changes the way Eren reacts. His heart still thrums wildly in his chest and his blood still runs quick but he doesn't hold any more hesitation or doubt. He delves in without worrying about whether or not he's doing something wrong. For once, he's confident.

He presses Levi into the headboard, trapping him against the wall. He searches for all of Levi's sensitive spots. The base of his throat is where Eren nips and nibbles and Levi's fingers coil tighter in his hair. He pulls at the hem of Levi's shirt and tugs it off. Eren looks at Levi. He takes in all the battle scars that crisscross his pale skin and the dark marks from the years of using the maneuvering gear. Eren has yet to gain any marks of his own—he hasn't been using the gear long enough. His tongue follows a scar, leaving a wet trail on Levi's skin.

"Eren, I'm not something to eat," he grumbles. Eren snickers and he tugs at Levi's slacks.

"But I want to devour you." There's a pinch on Eren's ear.

"Ow!"

"Don't make me sick with corny lines like that." After freeing his ear from Levi's grip, he flashes a wide grin.

"Sorry." Levi's pants are off and discarded. He's completely bare beneath Eren. Normally when a person is undressed they look vulnerable but Levi doesn't. All of his defined muscle and scars are bared and it's rather intimidating. Levi peels off Eren's shirt and stares at him for a second.

"You look skinnier," he notes. His fingertips run along Eren's sides where his ribcage is visible. Eren's trousers are tugged down and Eren gracelessly kicks them off. He adjusts himself over Levi and slips a hand underneath one of his small thighs. But Levi interrupts.

"Hold it," and Eren pauses, "Are you clean?" The question is so offbeat that it doesn't register in Eren's mind.

"Huh?"

"Did you bathe today? I'm not letting you touch me if you're still filthy." Eren groans.

"Captain…" he whines in frustration. "We're already this far."

"And we're not going any further until you're clean." Eren opens his mouth to protest again but Levi's scary eyes lock on him and it dies on his tongue. Levi is steadfast.

"Yes sir…" He crawls off the bed and mechanically heads to the washroom. He turns on the water and realizes he's not alone. Levi is there with him.

"This time, don't ruin a perfectly good bath, got it?"

"You mean we're bathing together again?" Levi turns a cheek and crosses his arms.

"I've gotta make sure you actually get clean, don't I?"

* * *

Levi's head is pillowed by one of Eren's arms and the other encircles his waist—they fit together well. Eren doesn't completely envelope Levi but he's just tall enough that his torso frames Levi's back.

"Hey Captain…"

"What is it?" Eren hesitates before speaking and when he finally does speak, his voice is low and uncertain.

"If I lose control…you'll still kill me, right?" Levi scoffs.

"Is that even a question?" Eren lets out a sigh of relief and he feels lighter. His eyes fall shut against the back of Levi's head and he breathes in deeply his distinctive soapy clean scent.

"Do you really want to die that badly?" Eren smiles and shakes his head.

"No, no I like being alive." He presses his lips against the top of Levi's head.

"It's just that I've been having these weird thoughts lately…" Eren feels Levi shift a fraction.

"What kind of thoughts?"

"…A lot of the times, they're about you. And for a moment, I can't tell what's reality and what's not." Eren shivers. The blood and Levi's cold dead skin feel so real that it haunts Eren. But right now, Levi is warm and it's comforting. Levi is quiet for a moment.

"Eren…you need to stop letting that psycho experiment on you." And he sounds adamant. Eren agrees. Even if somehow Doctor can help him control his titan, the toll Eren is taking isn't worth it. He's scared.

"I know. I won't go with Doctor anymore."

"So you've finally come to your senses," Levi mutters. "Maybe your head isn't so hollow after all."

* * *

Levi shoots up straight and his head snaps in the direction of the door. _Dammit_. The military police really had been monitoring them this whole time. That means they know Eren doesn't intend to continue with the experiments. Levi should never have let his guard down.

"Eren…!" Eren is slow to wake up and when his eyes finally crack open, he groans.

"What?" he mumbles only half awake. Levi is on his feet and hastily pulling on his shirt.

"They're here." Eren sits up with furrowed brows.

"Huh?" And then the door slams open and a squad of MPs burst inside. Eren jumps in shock.

"You're under arrest Eren Jaeger." Eren jolts and his eyes bug.

"Wh-what?" Eren's arms are seized and he's jerked off the bed but shortly the holds are gone and the MPs are sprawled on the floor at Eren's feet, moaning in pain. Levi is pummeling into another MP and he's tackled from behind around the waist but none of them are a match for humanity's strongest fighter and soon they both fall. A metallic clicking sound resonates through the chaos and everything is suddenly still and silent. One of the MPs holds a gun aimed straight at Levi.

"You may be humanity's strongest soldier but you still have to obey the law." Levi doesn't even blink an eye as he ducks and twists the gun from out of the MP's hand. The pistol is now in Levi's possession and automatically all the rest of the MPs raise their guns pointed right at him. Eren can't breathe, he can't move; all he can do is stand there and watch.

"Do you even know how to use a gun?" one of the MPs says. Levi points it at him and the MP laughs but it sounds shaky.

"Scouts don't use guns. They don't know how to." Levi's thumb flips off the safety and he cocks it.

"Wanna bet?" And his voice is cold and merciless. The MP stiffens.

"You wouldn't shoot me," but he sounds uncertain. Levi's eyes harden and he doesn't falter.

"Try me."

"Captain! It's fine, I'll go with them. It's not a big deal." Eren tries to sound lighthearted about it but the corporal is scaring him, just a little bit. Levi doesn't even glance his way.

"Shut up, Eren."

"Levi," comes a deep authoritative voice. "Lower the gun." Levi's jaw tightens and for a moment he does nothing.

"Levi," Irvin repeats in a low growl. Levi scoffs through his teeth and his arms fall to his sides. Immediately the MPs snatch the gun from his hand and they twist his arms behind his back. A wince passes over Levi's face as his elbows pop from the sharp angle.

"You're under arrest Lance Corporal Rivaille." Eren steps forward.

"Wait! Don't arrest him! He was just protecting me." They all turn to look at him and Eren stands firm.

"If I go without a struggle, will you release Captain Levi?" There's a moment of silence.

"If you come, we won't arrest the Corporal."

"Okay, I'll go with you." They unhand Levi and take Eren's arms. Without thinking, Levi lurches forward and Irvin catches him with a tight grip on his shoulder.

"Don't do anything reckless, that's an order." They shove Eren out the door and take him away. A few of the MPs remain, warily watching Levi. It takes all of Levi's willpower not to go after them and if Irvin's hand hadn't been holding onto him, he probably wouldn't have succeeded in keeping still. Once Eren is out of sight the rest of the MPs turn on Levi.

"You're under arrest, Corporal Rivaille. You can't point a gun at the military police and expect to get away with it. It's treason." Levi already knows this.

"Tch, I'm not an idiot. I know the consequences of my actions." And they cuff Levi's hands in front of him and tow him away, pulling him from right out of Irvin's possessive hold.

* * *

**Afterword: Cliff. Hanger. Yup. **

**Next chapter I _think_ will be the end. I wrote too much to put into one chapter. And I'm still not through...**


	10. Chapter 10: Finale

**Author's note: So I give props to inuyasharocks123 for totally predicting my next move. I applaud you.**

**And I also want to shout out to ObsessedWithPercyJackson. You've stuck with this story for a long time. Thanks for the support. I appreciate it. Plus you have an awesome pen name.  
**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter. It meant A LOT. Reviews always mean a lot to me but more so last chapter for some reason. **

**This is it! This is the end! It's long and I felt like I just wrote a whole bunch of bullcrap. I feel like this whole story has been nothing but bull since like chapter three. But I post it anyway. **

**Thank you for reading. I'll keep the story posted for a while but we'll see if it actually stays...  
**

* * *

Eren is roughly shoved into Doctor's lab. Doctor is facing away from him when he enters, completely silent. And Doctor is never silent. The air is still and icy and weighs heavily on Eren's shoulders like pressure points. He has a sour taste in his mouth too. He knows this can't be good. Doctor slowly turns to him. His dark eyes are ice and his smile is rigid and harsh.

"Eren, did you really think you could go back on your word?" Eren's eyes widen.

"How did you know that?" That all too sweet smile stretches across Doctor's mouth and there's a flash behind his glasses. His reply is slow and his voice is eerily low.

"I know it all. We've always monitored you from the very beginning. We know everything that goes on behind closed doors." Eren remembers that first night Levi had said they were being monitored and the uneasy feeling that had holed its way in Eren's gut—it all makes sense now. Eren glares.

"That's messed up. You really are a creep." Doctor holds onto Eren's jaw and towers over him. His skin is ice and his touch is disturbingly affectionate, Eren has to restrain himself from trembling and exposing any of the fear teeming inside him. Doctor's face is dark and severe and much too close for comfort.

"No, you know what's truly messed up? When a person refuses to sacrifice anything for the sake of humanity." The words impact Eren. The breath is knocked out of him and he goes limp against his restraints.

"…I swear I'll annihilate the titans," he mutters, more to himself than anyone else. He swears he'll repay everyone. He _won't _let them down. Then his fiery eyes flick up and zero-in on Doctor. "And I'll do it without your help!" Doctor laughs and jerks Eren's face closer so that they're eye-to-eye. Eren can see his own face reflected back in the round lenses of his glasses.

"It's too late. Your mind is already corroded. My job is done." Eren's teeth grind together.

"Only a monster wants to kill the person he cherishes the most." Eren is yanked forward and he accidentally cries out. Internally he kicks himself for showing any weakness in front of this creep. Then he hears Doctor's silky hypnotizing voice directly in his ear.

"The Lance Corporal is your weakness. He's the gate to all the madness." Eren sucks in a sharp breath. Doctor better leave Levi out of this or he'll regret it, Eren will be sure that he does.

"Fuck you," he snarls. Doctor smiles and continues on without a hitch.

"Who knew the Lance Corporal was such a lewd guy." Eren jolts.

"What the hell are you talking about?" he snaps. Doctor replies with a false sympathetic edge to his tone.

"Playing around with three different men, that's pretty impressive." Then Doctor purses his lips thoughtfully. "Well I don't know if you'd be considered a man, so maybe two men and a brat. Yes, I think that would be politically correct however still impressive." Eren stares at him. Three people? There's him and the commander but…who else?

"That's right, you're only aware of the corporal's relations with that charming commander." The only response Eren gives is a hateful glare.

"You remember the general, right? General Zacklay?" Eren's eyes are slits and his teeth gnash together until it hurts.

"What about him?" he spits through his teeth.

"The corporal had quite the encounter with that man." Eren doesn't ask Doctor to elaborate. He's not sure if he wants to hear it.

"The corporal was ordered by that lovely commander to surrender to the general for the sake of pushing that mission through legislation without fail. I found it all quite entertaining." Eren feels sick.

"But I probably wasn't nearly as entertained as the corporal being that he was thoroughly ravished by the general." Eren turns away with closed eyes. His heart is tearing inside of him.

"Stop talking…" But Doctor doesn't stop.

"And when I say thoroughly, I mean he was completely conquered, practically to the point of incapacitation. I have no idea how he managed to walk upright, let alone fight only days afterward." There's a tick inside of Eren. He shakes his head as if he could shake away the images and memories going through his mind. He didn't want to hear that. He didn't want to know that. But was that why Levi had been in so much pain that day? _Levi…_

"I don't want to hear anymore!" His voice bursts out of him and it's desperate and broken. Doctor pats his cheek as if to comfort him.

"Don't fret. He enjoyed it, Eren. The corporal is a masochistic man. It makes sense though, right? Why else would he want to be with someone as sadistic as you?" Doctor's fingers are curled around his chin again as he whispers hotly into his ear, "You two are a perfect match…"

Eren grits his teeth. Everything Doctor says is disgusting and his words act as a catalyst for the uncontrollable fire inside him. He's burning and he can feel it quickly spreading. He's losing control. Suddenly Eren's chin is released and Doctor turns his back. He's not facing him but he keeps talking and Eren wishes he would stop. His voice is grating to his ears. And the more he speaks, the more intense the rage bubbles up inside of him.

"What would you do if I told you the Lance Corporal is being tortured as we speak?" There's an intense flare inside Eren and he's shouting.

"Shut up! They wouldn't hurt him! You're lying!" He sounds more animalistic than human at this point.

"Uh, Doc…" one of the MPs holding onto Eren pipes in. His voice is shaky and his grip is loosening around Eren's arm—he's scared.

"Maybe you shouldn't provoke him any further." Doctor ignores that and continues on. He glances over his shoulder and there's a cruel sneer twisting his face.

"He's become an enemy to the human race because of you. And now he has to pay." Eren sees red. Volatile black fury swells in Eren's chest and blazing liquid fire rages through his veins. If they hurt Levi, he'll destroy them. He can't be caged, he can't be controlled. He's a monster. He jerks from out of the MP's restraints and winds back a fist. It comes slamming at the doctor but he had been expecting this and moves out of the way. Eren's fist connects with the window behind him and glass shatters everywhere. Bits lodge in Eren's knuckles and blood gushes down and streams off his fingertips. He shakes with irrepressible wrath and his muscles seize. _He'll annihilate them all._ And he'll enjoy every second of it.

* * *

Levi leans against the wall with his hands still bound in front of him. He's been in this filthy cell for who knows how long. It's boring and he needs to find Eren. There's a bad feeling in his gut. Doctor is probably experimenting on him against his will now. A jeering laugh echoes off the barren walls of the small prison.

"Haha, so humanity's greatest soldier is behind bars now." Levi looks up. It's that damn asshole MP and his nose is pretty much healed now. _How sad…_

"What did you do? Wait let me guess, it's got something to do with that monster right?" Levi doesn't respond.

"You must've really fucked up." Levi takes a step forward and the MP reels back. It almost makes Levi smile. Even caged like this, the guy fears Levi. And he definitely should.

"The only regret I have is holding back." There's a glint of bloodlust in Levi's eyes but it's so subdued that it's almost imperceptible. The MP scans him for a moment with a contemplative look.

"Maybe you're a monster too." Levi doesn't bother responding. He's had enough of this guy. But apparently the MP hasn't had enough of Levi and he's at the bars of the cell, looking in with a smirk plastered on his face.

"I'm tempted to go in there. You're appealing in shackles." And his eyes rove over him from head to toe and back up again. There's a dangerous flash behind Levi's eyes.

"Come in here, I dare you." The MP grins but makes no attempt to move.

"Hah, I'm not an idiot." Levi quirks an eyebrow.

"You wouldn't be trying my patience if that were true." The door opens and they both turn. Irvin is there and when his eyes land on the MP his expression hardens a fraction. Levi can tell he's in a very foul mood.

"Leave us," he commands. The MP stares.

"But it's my job to—" Irvin's steel eyes lock on him.

"—I said to leave." Only a fool wouldn't obey Irvin when he uses that stern, authoritative tone. The MP instinctively nods and slips by, quickly passing through the door. It clicks shut and then Irvin whirls on Levi.

"What the hell were you thinking?" he demands. Levi turns a cheek.

"If you came to scold me like a child, I don't want to hear it."

"You know you should never use guns, especially against the military police."

"Hey, give me some credit. I didn't shoot the bastard, did I?"

"That's not the point, Levi. How do you expect me to get you out of there?" Levi gives an unconcerned shrug.

"I'll get out." Irvin sits down in the lone chair in front of the cell, eyes fixed to him.

"It's not like you to make reckless choices."

"Maybe I've been hanging around that brat too much," he mutters then he looks up at Irvin. "Do you know where they took him?" Irvin's eyes shift to the side with a hardline frustrated look.

"No, I searched for him but I couldn't find him or Doctor."

"You know that's not a good sign, right?" Irvin nods with a grave look in his eye.

"I know." There's a long silence. Levi looks down at his cuffed hands and sighs.

"Irvin…about what happened before—"

"Now's not the time." Levi's eyes narrow. Irvin doesn't want to hear him out but Levi will make him listen.

"Now's a time as good as any. It's not like I'm going anywhere." Irvin's eyes shift back to Levi and his face is a cool deadpan.

"Alright, what do you want to say?" and his voice is colder than Levi is used to. He's heard Irvin use this kind of tone with other recruits but never has he used it with Levi. It's like Irvin is disconnected from him. Levi's hands clench and he can't bring himself to look Irvin in the eye.

"I ran away and that was a shitty move, I know that. I'm an asshole but it made me realize something." And finally he builds up the nerve to meet Irvin's gaze.

"I—" The door opening interrupts him and they both reluctantly turn. The man who stands there surprises them both.

"Afternoon, Commander," Zacklay tilts his head respectfully toward Irvin and then toward Levi. "Afternoon, Corporal."

"General Zacklay, what brings you here?" Irvin asks standing up straight.

"I'm fulfilling a favor." He addresses Levi.

"Lance Corporal, I spoke with the president just as you insisted but it seems I've arrived a tad late. I apologize." Levi watches as Zacklay approaches the cell and takes out a key. He unlocks it and opens it wide.

Levi swiftly passes through and as Zacklay unlocks his cuffs, he asks, "What did he say?"

"I've convinced him to prohibit testing on Jaeger."

"That means Eren has to be released." Once Levi is free, he rubs his raw wrists and turns to the door.

"I'm going to find him." Zacklay's hand extends toward Levi to clutch onto his shoulder but a rough grip snatches his wrist from out of the air and stops him short. Zacklay's gaze flicks toward Irvin in surprise.

"I would prefer if you didn't touch my corporal." Levi lazily glances over his shoulder at them both wearing a dull, indifferent mask. And the current situation greatly amuses Zacklay.

His reply is curt but compliant as he regards Commander Irvin, "Of course."

* * *

Levi heads down the hall leading to the Biological lab. He turns and is surprised to see Eren racing toward him in a sprint. Eren escaped? Levi is a bit relieved—that means one less thing for Levi to deal with. He comes to a stop and watches as Eren runs at him. For some reason the closer Eren gets, the more Levi's gut squirms. Levi feels strangely apprehensive—the hairs on the nape of his neck stand on end and there's a sinking feeling in his stomach. This had been too easy… Eren stops right in front of Levi and towers over him.

"Levi." _That piece of shit._ Levi's eyes are tapered as he jabs a finger at him.

"I told you not to call me by my first name, shithead." Eren ignores him and his intense green eyes rove all over Levi with slow deliberation and Levi feels oddly exposed under that stare. There's something off about Eren's eyes. There's always a low intensity burning behind them like a muted flame but right now his eyes are too bright—they're _too_ intense. Levi scans Eren's body, searching for any damage. A splotch of red catches his eye. There's blood on Eren's shirt but Levi doesn't see any wounds. He gazes up at Eren suspiciously.

"Where did that blood come from?" he questions. Eren shrugs and smiles. It's an odd time to smile and that smile cuts into Eren's face harshly like a blade. Suddenly he catches Levi's chin and jerks his face upward. He forces his tongue into Levi's mouth before Levi even has a chance to react and his other arm is at his lower back, grasping him too tightly.

This isn't right. This kiss…it's violent. It's like Eren really is going to devour him. Eren's hold tightens until Levi can't breathe and Eren's teeth are sharp on his bottom lip, so sharp that Levi feels the skin break and then Eren is lapping at his blood. Levi's stomach roils. _Disgusting. _

He senses Eren's other hand close in on his neck. Levi's eyes widen. He knows this move… People use this move to snap their victims' necks. Eren is going to _kill_ him. Without wasting another second, he twists out of Eren's hold, seizes his arm, and tosses him over his shoulder. There's a loud crack at Eren's elbow. Levi might have shattered it and Eren slams against the floor.

"What the hell, Eren!" He wipes his mouth on the back of his knuckles and blood comes back. Eren really did bite him. No… this isn't Eren. This is a monster. Even though Levi broke Eren's arm only seconds ago, he's now healed and jumps to his feet. Without sparing Levi another look, he turns to bolt down the hall. Levi is frozen. What the hell is going on? He spins on his heel to face Doctor. He'd noticed the bastard had been watching from the very beginning.

Levi's sharp eyes are ice and his voice is steady and cool as he says, "What the fuck did you do to him?" Doctor's eyes are wild and bright with insanity.

"I made him strong. I cultivated the hate and madness inside him until it couldn't be controlled." Levi's severe gaze is steadfast and overpoweringly chilling that nervous sweat actually beads at Doctor's hairline. A spasm ripples up the muscles lacing Levi's forearms as he becomes closer to Doctor and even though Levi is a short man, Doctor feels small under his merciless stare.

"I hate guys like you," he says without any hint of emotion in his low voice. "You think you're so goddamn smart but you really don't get the half of it." Doctor shrinks back and pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

"What don't I understand?" Levi stares at him unblinkingly as he answers.

"It's _not_ his rage and hate that make Eren powerful," and he says this slowly, deliberately enunciating each syllable to get it through this bastard's thick skull. Levi's jaw tightens and his fingers curl into fists. "It's his will to save the lives around him. He's not a monster."

* * *

Eren stands alone in the large empty conference room. His head is tilted down and his hair veils his face. All of his expression is shadowed. After much frantic searching, Mikasa managed to locate him and she runs to him. Her hands grip tightly to his shoulders.

"Eren!" He doesn't respond. Mikasa shakes him and her eyes scan over his body. He's not injured and he appears fine but why isn't he replying?

"Eren?" Then slowly he looks up and his eyes are unfocused and glazed over but they somehow seem to root straight into her heart.

"I will…" and then a chilling rictus grin stretches from ear-to-ear, "…devour everyone." Mikasa's eyes widen as she sucks in a startled gasp. That crazed smile stretches until its too large for the expanse of his face.

"Move away!" someone yells from behind Mikasa and suddenly she's knocked meters away from Eren and she lands hard on her side. She looks up just in time to see Eren bite down on his hand and erupt into his titan. He bursts through the roof and the ceiling collapses. Mikasa narrowly rolls out of the way of the falling debris. Once the ceiling stops dropping rubble, Mikasa looks up and sees an open hand extended toward her. She meets Levi's sharp eyes before taking hold to his hand and he pulls her to her feet.

"Eren's lost control," he says with controlled calm. Mikasa's breath catches in her throat. She throws off her Scouting Cloak and her fingers curl around the handgrips of her gear. Levi eyes her skeptically.

"You're already wearing your gear?" She nods.

"Yeah and I brought you a spare." She bends down and picks up the pack she had been carrying. She unzips it and hands it to Levi.

"How did you know?" he asks after taking it. He empties its contents and starts suiting up.

"I didn't. It was Armin." It doesn't take Levi very long to adjust the straps and buckle the belts and soon he's ready to fight. It's a little loose on him but it'll work.

"Smart kid. Did he have any other plans in case Eren went berserk?" Mikasa shrugs.

"I don't know." Levi's face tilts upward as he gazes up through the hole in the ceiling.

"We have to stop him." And from the corner of his eye he focuses on Mikasa. "No matter what." Mikasa doesn't know why he's eyeing her like that. It's like he doubts her ability to protect Eren. She tugs at her scarf and her eyes flash with determination as she nods.

"Let's go." Mikasa grapples to the roof and shoots outside. He's about to follow when he notices Irvin and hesitates. Irvin's eyes are stony and commanding as he addresses him.

"Levi, you know what this means, right?" Levi's face is wiped clean of all expression and Irvin can almost believe that he remains detached and unaffected in this situation.

"You'll have to kill Eren."

"I can just cut him out—"

"He's too dangerous. This has been a failure. You can _try_ to cut him free but if killing him is your only option, so be it." Levi's eyes are back on the ceiling.

"Yeah. I got it."

"Do you really?" Then Levi glares and the muscles in his jaw flex.

"Have I ever failed? I know what I have to do." And he spins on his heel to join Mikasa but there's a grip on his wrist and he's pulled back. Suddenly Irvin's mouth is on his. Levi jerks away. He's pissed that Irvin would take him by surprise like that but he can't let himself be distracted. He's off and doesn't offer Irvin a second glance.

They're on the rooftops and Mikasa is beside him. He's impressed that she keeps up with him so easily. And that dark look she keeps shooting at him doesn't go by unnoticed.

"If looks could kill, I'd probably be dead," Levi remarks offhandedly. He really doesn't give a damn that this girl has some kind of issue with him but if it's going to distract her from the problem at hand, they better clear the air first. Mikasa's expression darkens further.

"You cheated Eren." Levi looks at her in surprise.

"What are you talking about?" Abruptly she turns on him and backs him up against a wall. She towers over him with that hateful glare.

"Did you even care about Eren at all or were you merely toying with him?" Levi counters her glare with one of his own.

"I _don't_ toy with people."

"Then what the hell was that back there?" And then Levi understands. She saw Irvin kiss him but he doesn't falter.

"That's none of your business," he coolly replies.

"You're not good for him." And Levi stares at her for a moment before responding.

"You're probably right but at the moment, that's not the issue. We need to get to Eren." From out of nowhere, there's an explosion that shakes the entire district and they both snap in the direction. Smoke rises high in the sky and they see Eren's titan over the rooftops but he's not alone. He's in the middle of a wrestling match with the female titan.

"What is she doing here?" Mikasa whispers breathlessly—fear has knocked all of the air from out of her lungs. Her eyes are wide and her knees bend in a stance ready to leap toward them. Levi catches her wrist before she can fly off.

"Wait." Mikasa pauses and follows Levi's line of sight. They watch the two of them fight. Annie is holding onto Eren's shoulders and Eren is ruthlessly pounding into her face. His fists slam into her skull over and over again. Still Annie doesn't let go even as her face grotesquely caves in.

"I don't think the female titan means to hurt Eren. I think she's trying to keep him in place." Then after a few more seconds of spectating he adds, "And she's losing. Badly."

"But why—" And Mikasa ponders for a moment. "…Armin. This must be part of his plan." Levi looks at her.

"Let's hope it works."

* * *

"Eren is strong, even stronger than last time," Armin observes. Eren had only barely defeated Annie, their strength was practically equal before but right now its like her strength isn't even at a fraction of his. She can't keep this up for much longer and they need more time.

"Come on," he says to Jean. It's risky but they maneuver close to Eren's face.

"Eren! Get a hold of yourself! You're not an enemy to humanity!" Armin yells as he passes by Eren's pointed ear. Eren swings a palm at him and Armin ducks out of the way. As Eren's attention is directed to Armin, Jean curves around to the nape of Eren's neck and grapples to it.

"Jean! Watch out!" Eren's hand comes swinging at him.

"Dammit!" Jean jumps out the way and lands on a broken down rooftop. Soon Armin is next to him. Annie lost grip of Eren's shoulders and he has her straddled underneath him as he beats senselessly into her skull.

"Get out of there, Annie!" Armin shrieks. Eren fists her hair, lifts her off the ground, and slams her back down into the stone. Armin takes off but stops short. There's a flash and the armored titan suddenly tackles Eren.

"No! What the hell is he doing? That was supposed to be a last resort!" Jean shouts. Armin is a bit more composed.

"He's protecting Annie. Eren was going to kill her. There was no way she was going to get out of there alive." Reiner slams a fist into Eren and Eren flies backward into a building.

"Shit…I don't think he plans to just keep Eren still. He's going to beat him around for hurting Annie. Not that I mind Eren being beat around a little but civilians might get hurt." Armin's eyes sweep the ground.

"Where're Bertholdt and Connie?" Jean extends an arm and points.

"There." Connie and Bertholdt are a few meters from Reiner's foot, pulling back away from the fight. Bertholdt looks like he's going to be sick when Armin and Jean meet up with them. He meets Armin's eye with an apologetic look.

"Sorry Armin, we couldn't just wait around while Annie got thrashed like that."

"You were right to interfere. Did Annie get out okay?" Bertholdt turns and looks down the ruined street where a cloud of steam shrouds the capsized female titan.

"Yeah, Ymir and Historia are helping her out." Next Armin addresses Connie.

"Connie, join up with Sasha and try to sever the tendon at Eren's ankle. That should slow him down some." Connie nods.

"Roger." And then he's gone.

* * *

"What are _they_ doing here?" Levi's eyes train on the tangled mass of the titan bodies struggling and grappling hold to each other. Their limbs are so knotted together that Levi can't tell where one ends and the next begins.

"I told them to stay _outside_ the wall." Levi and Mikasa are close now. Just one last row of rooftops and they'll be a part of the action too.

"I think this is part of Armin's doing too. I told him everything we learned. He probably met the others outside the wall and snuck them in as backup in case Eren really did lose it." Levi sighs.

"This is chaos. The military police will be quick to intervene."

"There's nothing they can do at this point. They weren't prepared for this, none of us were. Armin is the only one who devised some sort of strategy."

Eren unleashes a ground-shaking roar and he breaks free from the hold that the armored titan had on him. Eren swings a fist and when it makes impact with Reiner, his armored skin shatters. Pieces crumble off his shoulder and he loses an arm. Eren hits him again and this time his fist breaks completely through Reiner's chest. Mikasa's eyes go wide.

"Last time Eren's attacks didn't have any effect on the armored titan's hardened skin. But now he's not having any problem inflicting damage."

"That doctor must've done something to make Eren stronger. He's too much for the other titans to handle," Levi says. He hesitates and Mikasa stops too. Irvin was right… Eren is too dangerous. Levi really will have to kill him.

"What are you waiting for?" Mikasa demands. "We have to get over there." He doesn't respond as he starts moving again. They make it to a rooftop that's only meters away. The other recruits are taking hacks at Eren's legs in order to slow him down but it doesn't seem like it's working. Levi turns and notices that squads of military police are approaching now. They took their damn time getting here.

Eren bites down into the side of the armored titan's neck and a loud agonized cry rips through the air.

"Reiner!" Bertholdt lifts his hand to his mouth and Jean yanks on his arm to stop him.

"No! You'll destroy the whole district with your titan! It's too big!" Bertholdt grits his teeth and Jean can see the war raging inside him.

"But he needs help." _Reiner… stay a warrior for a little longer, okay? Please survive._

"Look! It's Mikasa and Corporal Levi!" Bertholdt looks up and sees two quick shadows zip through the air above them.

"I don't know how much help they'll be," Bertholdt quietly mutters. What good will two more people do? They've tried everything and Eren is unstoppable. The determined look on Jean's face doesn't falter.

"But it's Mikasa and humanity's strongest soldier. They ain't your average chumps. They'll take care of it." Bertholdt sighs and wishes he had as much faith as Jean.

* * *

Levi is a blur as he hurtles straight to the back of Eren's neck. He's too quick; Eren doesn't even see him as he flies by. He grapples to the nape and dives toward the flesh, sharp blades ready to cut directly into him. The point of his blade is centimeters from making impact when another sword lodges between the edge and Eren's neck. He looks up and is eye-to-eye with a blackened glare.

Mikasa is blocking Levi's attack and now their blades are locked in a stalemate.

"I won't let you kill Eren," she snarls. She pushes with all of her strength against Levi and her arms tremble from the exertion but he doesn't budge. Eren glimpses over his shoulder and swings a hand. They dodge his attack and land on a nearby rooftop.

"How could you!" Levi has never seen so much hate in a single look before.

"He trusted you! He loved you! How can you kill him so easily? Do you even have a heart?!" He regards her with an unwavering deadpan.

"This is my responsibility," he coldly replies. Levi is a pawn and pawns merely follow commands, no matter what.

"Eren knew I wouldn't hesitate to kill him if he ever lost control." Mikasa thrusts a finger at Eren's titan that continues to brutally beat into the armored titan and the armored titan is only barely holding on.

"But he's still _in_ there! He can come back!" Levi's jaw sets. This choice he's about to make, he might regret it…

"Then use your every ability to stop me. Keep me busy until he comes to his senses." Mikasa's eyes widen. As long as he's fighting, he won't be failing Irvin. He has to trust that this girl can match his strength long enough for Eren to return to himself and he has to hope that Eren's friends can keep him from killing anyone during that time. The blood spilt will be on Levi's hands if he does and he doesn't want that burden.

"But be warned, I won't go easy on you." At that Mikasa's hands clench around the grips of her blades and she readies them by her side.

"I wouldn't expect you to."

"Don't slip up."

"You either."

* * *

"Annie!" Historia calls. She kneels down next to her. Annie is sprawled out on the ground, badly battered up. Blood trickles from her scalp and her limbs are set at unnatural angles. Her entire body lurches with heavy breathing and she's visibly trembling. Historia places a palm on Annie's broken shoulder.

"Rest now, it's okay. The others can handle it." Annie lets out a quiet breath and she struggles to pull herself into a sitting position.

"Don't overdo it!" Historia cries with wide eyes. Annie manages to sit up with her legs bent underneath her. Her icy blue eyes are downcast and distant.

"No," she says so quietly that Historia has to lean in closer to hear her. "They can't control him." She gazes up at Ymir who has her arms crossed as she stands over them. Ymir understands.

"He'll kill us all," she says and then her eyes shift to Historia. "We have to get out of here, Historia. There's no place for us inside these walls anymore." Historia is on her feet.

"But Ymir! Our friends need us!" Ymir scowls.

"I don't care about them. I need only you." Historia is glaring at her as she takes a step away.

"I'm not leaving!" Ymir takes a step closer to her and grabs hold of her wrist.

"Didn't we agree to live only for ourselves? If we stay here, we could die." Tears brew in Historia's eyes.

"Eren will come to his senses. I know he will. He promised to exterminate the titans."

Ymir brushes the tears that managed to slip out of Historia's round eyes and she murmurs, "There's something you don't know about Eren. Even if he does come back, he'll always be a threat. He's _dangerous_." Historia is steadfast.

"I'm not going." And Ymir can tell she's not going to bend this time. She sighs in defeat.

"Alright, you win. We'll stay but we're not going to fight Eren. Let the others handle it." Historia looks like she's about to protest so Ymir quickly adds, "And right now Annie needs our help." There's a spark in Historia's eyes as she spins on her heel and she's back on the ground at Annie's side, small fingers scaling every inch of her.

"Where does it hurt the most?" Annie brushes her hands away.

"I'm fine. I'll regenerate." Ymir watches them for a moment.

"Hey, Annie," she says, "Why did you unfreeze yourself? Wouldn't it have been easier just to stay sleeping?" Annie doesn't look at her as she answers.

"There was someone waiting for me." Ymir is surprised.

"Really? Who?" Annie is slow to reply and it's an unhelpful, enigmatic answer.

"…A friend." Ymir snorts.

"I meant a name." Then Annie groans and slumps over.

"My head hurts…" And immediately Historia is fussing and fretting over her, causing a much bigger scene than called for. Ymir clicks her tongue against her teeth in irritation.

"Hey! Don't change the subject!" But she's duly ignored.

* * *

"What the hell are they doing?!" Jean exclaims. He's helping Armin, Connie, and Sasha attack Eren's legs when he notices Levi and Mikasa going at each other on the rooftops.

"Why are they fighting each other?!" he demands. "Now's not the time for a damn lover's quarrel!"

"Forget them," says Armin. "We'll just have to deal with this ourselves."

"But we _need _them!"

"Maybe she wudn't share her rations with 'im. I'd kill 'er too," Sasha unhelpfully chimes in. A frustrated scoff bursts from Jean.

"Is _everything_ about food with you?" he snaps. Sasha is completely serious. There's no hint of humor on her face.

"Wut else am I gonna live fer?" Connie cuts in.

"Focus! Reiner can't keep this up!" Jean scoffs between his teeth and suddenly hurtles to Eren's face. Connie watches with wide eyes.

"What the hell is he doing?" he exclaims. Jean lands on Eren's shoulder and yells at the top of his lungs directly into his ear.

"Asshole! Get your fucking head on straight! Are you an enemy to the human race now? Are you a goddamn traitor?! You piss me off. Have you forgotten the lives that have been lost? What about Marco? HUH? I thought you were going to annihilate monsters, NOT BECOME ONE!" Eren becomes completely still.

"No way. He actually got through to him?" Connie can't believe it. Jean's eyes bug as Eren swipes at him. He springs to the side just as Reiner tackles Eren against a building. Then Jean is back with the others.

"What an asshole. He tries to hit me while I'm talking," he grumbles.

While Eren is trapped by Reiner, Armin points to Eren's foot. It's now exposed. "Jean!"

"On it!" And Jean grapples low to a building to zip by Eren's foot. He slashes clean through the tendon and Eren staggers. He collapses against the building behind him, arms flailing in an attempt to catch his weight. His arm slings right where Mikasa and Levi are fighting.

Levi sees the oncoming movement in his peripheral vision and shoves Mikasa out of the way but doesn't manage to miss it himself. Eren's hand slams down by Levi's feet and he's sent backward. Bits of sharp metal and stone fly at Levi and he bangs against a wall.

There's a sting at his arm so he rips off what's left of his shredded sleeve. Blood and muscle mass tumble out a deep gash on his upper arm. _Shit. _He clutches it tightly in an attempt to keep it back. He can't stall. He gnashes his teeth together and pushes through the pain. When Eren is back to himself, Levi will make sure to repay him in full for this.

He searches for Mikasa. She's nowhere in sight. Levi can't delay the inevitable anymore. He has to end this. Now. The armored titan is crushed against the ground as Eren stomps against his chest. Then he growls and bolts toward the wall. Does he plan to break through? Levi won't let that happen. He's at Eren's back and when Eren turns to fling a fist at him, he flips over his head and lands on the back of his neck. He cuts through and a thick chunk of Eren's flesh falls away. Eren is deeper inside the titan than Levi had thought. He can just make out the back of Eren's head. Fibers and muscle are fused to every part of him and layers and layers hold him in place. Eren struggles to turn and Levi can see the side of his face.

"Captain," he groans. _Eren. It's actually him._ He unleashes an agonized shout and then it cuts off as he clenches his teeth in an attempt to hold it back. His eyelids are squinted in pain then his blazing eyes fix to Levi.

"…Kill me," he breathes out. "I can't control it." Levi's eyes narrow.

"I already told you, you don't get to choose the way you die." And then the flesh of the titan pulls Eren deeper inside.

"This won't be pleasant."

Levi grimaces as he quickly slices through Eren's titan flesh. He severs through the nape and cuts him out but not without inflicting damage to Eren. He's amputated both of his forearms and both of his shins. A tormented scream shatters the air and Levi grits his teeth. He grabs hold to Eren and tugs him free. Eren is still howling in pure agony when Levi sets him on the ground. Tears streak his face and he won't stop screaming and squirming. Blood quickly pools around them and Levi is soaked through in crimson.

"Eren!" Mikasa shrieks as she collapses beside them. Her hands hover over Eren's writhing form but she doesn't know what to do. All they _can_ do is wait for Eren's injuries to heal on their own. She crumbles to his chest and her fingers curl into his bloodstained shirt. Then she twists to Levi with red, puffy eyes.

"Couldn't you have been more careful?" she demands in a shrill voice. Levi winces and doesn't reply. Tears squeeze out Mikasa's eyes but she doesn't say anything more and buries her face into Eren's chest. Eren isn't screaming anymore but his teeth and eyes are clinched tightly and a pitiful mix of hisses and whimpers follow each one of his breaths.

"Mikasa," Levi quietly murmurs. "Let me knock him unconscious so he won't suffer any longer." Mikasa doesn't move for a moment and then slowly she withdraws from Eren. She looks away as Levi's fist pounds against Eren's temple in just the right place so that he's sent into oblivion.

* * *

Mikasa shuts the door to the infirmary and faces the rest of the recruits of the 104th squad. They're sitting in the room and they stare at her in anticipation.

"He hasn't woken up yet." Jean groans.

"Just how much sleep does one person need?" he demands.

"As if you're one to talk. Last I remember, you'd sleep all day if I didn't wake up your lazy ass every morning," Connie retorts and Jean responds with a glare. He's about to spit a string of profanities at Connie when Bertholdt enters. They all face him with the same anticipation they showed Mikasa.

"Reiner and Annie are okay. Reiner is still recovering but Annie is fully healed." They all visibly relax.

"When I told Eren I wanted him to punch Reiner in the face, I didn't mean for him to flip shit and unleash all his titan strength on him," Connie mutters. Sasha elbows him in the side.

"Wanna raid the dinin' hall with me?" He looks at her for a moment and then turns a cheek.

"No." Sasha crosses her arms.

"Fine, I won't share with you then."

"Like I care."

Historia approaches Mikasa and takes her hand between her palms.

"He'll wake up soon. I know it." And her eyes are warm and overwhelmingly sincere that Mikasa has to look away. All she can do is nod. Suddenly Ymir snatches Historia's wrist and bends down to hiss in her ear.

"Don't flirt with her." Historia's face flushes bright red and she stutters and stammers but can't form a coherent response.

"Where is Captain Levi?" Armin questions. He's surprised that the corporal hasn't come to visit Eren since he'd been hospitalized.

"He's clearing up all the confusion with everyone so no one will come to hunt Eren down while he's recovering. And apparently, there's a lot of confusion. It's going to take time to convince everyone that Eren isn't really a traitor. He's also trying to convince them that now Reiner, Bertholdt, and Annie are on our side but who knows how that'll go." Armin grimaces.

"I hope the captain has enough influence."

"His rank might not be all that impressive but he's still the most powerful fighter humanity has. They can't afford to lose him." Armin nods in agreement. Then his deep blue eyes soften.

"How are you handling everything?" Mikasa tugs at her muffler.

"I'm worried." Armin sighs.

"Me too." He's quiet and then he adds, "But Eren promised he wouldn't ever leave me behind and he always keeps his word." A small smile forms on Mikasa's pink mouth and she feels a bit better.

* * *

Most of the military personnel are convinced that Eren isn't a traitor but the diplomats and citizens are still afraid. They want another trial so once Eren wakes up, he'll have to face judgment. Convincing anyone that the other titan shifters are no longer traitors, however, is a different story. They'll have to face judgment too but it's very much less likely that they'll have a merciful fate. Levi thinks they'll end up either being tortured or killed. But until their trial, they're being closely monitored in Military Police HQ.

Eren was transferred from out of the infirmary to his shared room upon Levi's request. No questions were asked as he was relocated and Levi has been keeping an eye on him. His friends have come to visit and at first they were inquisitive of why Eren was staying in a room with Levi but they either realized the truth or were too dense to care.

It's been almost a week since Eren lost control. He looks peaceful in his sleep like he doesn't have a care in the world. Levi curls up next to him and wonders if he's dreaming and what he's dreaming about. It's probably easier to escape into an endless sleep than to face reality. But it's time Eren faced the world, he can't run forever. Levi holds himself over Eren and sweeps the hair from out of his face.

"Wake up soon, that's an order." Eren's skin is lackluster and pale. Levi has never seen him look so dead before. Eren has always been pumped with so much life that it was overwhelming and slightly irritating. Still, Levi prefers an annoying Eren over a comatose one. Suddenly Eren's eyelids twitch and slowly crack open. Levi's heart stutters.

"Eren?" He doesn't respond. Eren is gazing up at the ceiling with deadened eyes as Levi's face hovers over him. A hand cups over Eren's cheek and his skin is cold against Levi's palm.

"Hey, Eren." He still doesn't react. The fire that's always burning behind Eren's eyes is completely quenched—they're unfocused and dull and lifeless and all that rage that was always lingering in the backs of his eyes is gone. He's just an empty shell. Levi sighs and rolls over.

"Fine, live like a ghost. I can't stop you."

The next day Levi sends for Hanji and she takes her goddamn time getting there. When she comes in Levi crosses his arms.

"What, were you taking a shit and it wouldn't come out?" Hanji passes him and takes a seat on the edge of the bed next to Eren.

"No, that went smoothly," Hanji adjusts her glasses before continuing. "I ran into Eren's friends on my way here and decided to chat a little with them." Levi rolls his eyes.

"More like torment them, if you ask me." Hanji smiles.

"I didn't ask but I appreciate your input." Hanji's face is close to Eren as she examines him. Her hands freely grope every part of him without the slightest bit of shame.

"I asked you to figure out what's wrong with him, not feel him up." Hanji chuckles.

"I'm sure it's nothing compared with what you do to him at night." There's an irritated twitch at Levi's brow.

"I don't touch him. He's like a friggin' corpse. And necrophilia is not my thing." Hanji waves her hand in front of Eren's blank eyes and heaves a sigh. She pushes her glasses up to the top of her head and faces Levi.

"Welp, I've got good news and bad news, which do you wanna hear first?" Levi's stoic demeanor doesn't change.

"Surprise me."

"Good news is that Eren is completely fine. Physically, there's nothing wrong with him."

"Then why is he a fucking vegetable?" Hanji's mouth presses into a tight line.

"That's the bad news, he—" A knock at the door interrupts them.

"Come on in!" Hanji calls. It's a few of Eren's friends—Reiner, Bertholdt, and Connie. They file in and salute.

"Captain Levi, Director Hanji, we've come to check on Eren," Reiner informs them. Abruptly Hanji is on her feet, directly in front of Reiner's face. She seizes his chin and tilts his head from side to side as she scopes him out with scary bright eyes.

"Amazing… not a single scratch is left!" Then her overwhelmingly intrusive eyes lock on Reiner's wide shocked ones. "Let me inspect every part of you." Reiner stiffens.

"E-eh…What?" Bertholdt interjects.

"Miss Hanji, do you know what's wrong with Eren?" Hanji let's go of Reiner and she crosses her arms.

"His mind is crumbling." A thick silence reigns over them.

"You mean like his brain is rotting?" Connie finally asks, not quite understanding the problem. Hanji shakes her head.

"No, technically speaking his brain is fine," she pauses and looks directly at Levi as she says, "He's slowly losing his sanity. Every time Eren turns into a titan his thought process alters a fraction. He's losing a piece of himself each time he shifts and it's becoming increasingly difficult for Eren to control himself." Connie thrusts a thumb at Reiner and Bertholdt.

"But if that's the case, does that mean these assholes are being affected too?" Hanji's eyes are on Reiner as she answers the question.

"No, they're completely sane, isn't that right?" Reiner nods. Then he looks at Levi.

"We told you Eren was different. He's strong. Compared to our titans, he's not very big but he can grow stronger and stronger. He can gather more power just by his will alone."

"The doctor had nothing to do with his apparent increased strength. And the more power Eren uses, the more he loses himself," Hanji says. Bertholdt is quiet and thoughtful when he speaks.

"There's only one titan that can match Eren's strength and influence." The air is cold and stiff because they all know of the monster that Bertholdt is referring to.

"The beast titan," Connie says aloud and Reiner and Bertholdt can't suppress the shudders that work up their spines. Reiner's jaw clenches and his hands are tight fists as he takes a step toward Levi.

"Eren is exactly the wrong kind of person to have his power. He's unpredictable and impulsive. He's a threat." Levi's eyes flash.

"And you're not? You turned your back on the human race for your own selfish reasons. Eren hasn't deliberately betrayed humanity that way." Reiner falters then there's a hand on his shoulder. He glances behind him and meets Bertholdt's reassuring gaze.

"We've lived as warriors but from now on, we're soldiers, right?" he murmurs in a voice low but strong. Reiner cracks a smile and Bertholdt hopes that it will always, always stay fixed there. That way he'll never have to see Reiner's pained face again.

"Yeah," he agrees, determination lining his brow.

Levi coolly watches them before he says, "Good, we could use some more soldiers when we go to regain Wall Maria."

* * *

Night has fallen and Levi feels just as cold as the chilling wintering air outside. There's an emptiness inside of his chest. He feels like he's being dragged down into a bottomless hole that he'll never escape from. And for some reason it hurts to breathe. He brings Eren food but if tonight is anything like the previous nights, making him eat will be a futile effort. When Levi walks into their room, Eren is set up against the headboard, hunched over and motionless in his comatose state.

"You need to eat," Levi instructs. As expected, Eren doesn't respond. With a heavy sigh, Levi rips off a small piece of the roll in his hand and forces it into Eren's mouth.

"Chew, you idiot." No movement. Then one moment Levi is standing over Eren and in the next, he's knelt in front of him. He's not sure how his body moved on its own accord but now that he's this close to Eren, he can see his face more clearly. It's as if the person Eren used to be isn't there anymore. All of his nerve and intensity have faded. And Levi hates to admit that he greatly misses it. His arms curl around Eren's slender frame and he pulls him close.

"Say something…" They stay like that for a long time until finally Levi pulls away. He observes Eren's lifeless face and touches the back of his knuckles over Eren's cheek.

"You really are a pain, you know that?" Then he leans in and presses his lips against Eren's. It's a soft kiss but it doesn't lack any affection. The lips are latent under his and part under the slight pressure. He feels Eren's slow breath against his mouth. _Eren…_Why won't he respond_? _Does he really want to live as a lifeless shell?

Then Levi's eyes widen when the back of his head is strongly gripped and he's pulled forward. Eren's mouth widens and his tongue slips between Levi's teeth. He tries to jerk away but Eren's hold is firm. After a moment the shock passes and Levi let's himself react. He melts into Eren. His palm presses against Eren's chest and he can feel the strong pounding of his heart inside. All too soon Eren pulls away.

"You…" he's stunned by Levi's reaction.

"You kissed me," Eren says breathlessly, a smile breaking its way onto his face bit by bit. There's an impatient twitch at Levi's brow.

"It's not like I haven't done that before," he growls. Eren smiles and his cheeks are flushed with healthy color.

"I know but it always surprises me." Levi's eyes flick to the side.

"Why didn't you wake up? I had to go as far as that to get a reaction from you." Eren laughs.

"I did the same for you, remember?"

Levi remembers and his eyes are hard as he says, "Don't do that again." A warm smile graces Eren's face.

"Sorry." The bed shifts as Levi crawls over to sit next to him.

"Where were you? Could you not hear me?" At that Eren turns away. His fingers pull and tug at each other in his lap nervously as he gives a reluctant reply.

"No… I heard everything. I just didn't want to face everyone." He bites his lip. "I really hurt them. I let everyone down…"

"Don't run away from your fears, Eren. You're not a coward. In the end, no lives were lost so it's fine."

Eren looks at him for a moment then asks, "Why didn't you kill me?" Levi blinks.

"Did you want to die?" Eren's eyes are downcast and he stares at his upturned palms displayed in front of him.

"In that moment, I did. I was terrified of myself and I'm still afraid…" Levi doesn't reply for a second then his fingers slowly entwine with Eren's.

"You don't have anything to be afraid of. I won't let you lose control. Don't you trust me?" Eren sucks in a sharp breath. Of course he trusts Levi. The only reason he's here right now is because of him. But instead of saying this out loud he leans close and presses his mouth against Levi's. He gasps when he feels Levi's tongue slip through his teeth. All of a sudden, Levi is on top of him, straddling Eren's hips and pushing him up against the headboard. Then he's tearing at his shirt and its gone.

"You—" but Levi doesn't give Eren any time to speak. His mouth is on his again and his scarred hands are deliberately stroking all of Eren's sensitive areas. Blood surges to Eren's head and he feels dizzy and hot and Levi's blazing touch isn't helping. Levi roughly undoes Eren's pants and his fingers slip inside. Eren squirms. His heart is banging so hard inside his chest he's sure it'll rupture at any second.

Eren needs to breathe. He turns away and gasps for air. And Levi's mouth merely moves to his neck, nimble lips working at the hollow of his throat.

"…Captain…" Eren breathes out. An assertive Levi is overwhelming. Eren can't take it. Levi's mouth works down Eren's chest, down his torso, until he meets the waistband to Eren's pants.

"Captain!" Eren gasps in shock. Levi's tongue is roving over him and Eren's toes curl and his muscles tighten.

"…I haven't bathed," he chokes out. Levi's eyes flick up to him.

"Fine. Let's bathe." And he yanks Eren's arm and he stumbles after Levi into the bathroom.

Levi is over Eren and his mouth is on Eren's collarbone, tongue tracking across it and licking up the droplets of water that cling to his skin. Eren's breath is short and every place Levi touches him buzzes with electric heat.

"Captain…you're making me insane." Levi pauses and cups a hand over Eren's cheek, his touch is now gentle and Eren leans into it.

"...Hold on to your sanity as long as you can." And Eren knows Levi isn't talking about the rush Eren feels right now. Eren won't go insane though. He'll control it. He won't let himself slip away again.

"Yes sir." Then Levi's eyes focus on Eren's mouth and he leans in for another kiss.

* * *

Levi is under him, quickly growing impatient.

"Come on Eren, what's taking so long?" Truth is, Eren is afraid to hurt Levi.

"Um…we don't have anything to make this easier, do we?" Levi scoffs.

"We don't need anything. Just do it." Eren doesn't move.

"What if I hurt you?"

"I'm telling you I'll be fine. You can't hurt me." Eren sighs and his expression is bleak and sorrowful as he meets Levi's sharp eyes.

"That's not true. Just look at what I did to your arm." His fingertips brush over the bandage and Eren's head falls to his chest. Levi clicks his teeth together.

"Get over it. Dwelling is pointless." Eren looks up at him and Levi can still see the pain lingering behind his eyes.

"I'll heal. I may not be invincible but I'm pretty damn close." Finally Eren smiles and the tension inside him melts and he drives forward. Levi's body jerks.

"Idiot! I wasn't ready!" he snaps. Eren stops breathing for a second.

"Ack! Sorry!" A short, irritated breath bursts from Levi's chest.

"Just keep going," he grumbles. Eren readjusts himself between Levi's thighs and goes in again. This time Levi isn't so tight and Eren fits easier than he thought he would. Levi's arms wind around his neck and his fingers tangle in the strands of Eren's hair as Eren moves. Levi's eyes are half-lidded and he lets out a soft sigh that ghosts the tip of Eren's ear.

"Eren…" and his voice is a quiet husky rasp. Eren shivers. He's never heard Levi sound that way before. He wants him to say his name like that again so his movements turn a bit more forceful and Eren can hear a low sound build in the back of Levi's throat. He thrusts forward again and this time he's gratified with a moan. Levi's face reddens and his eyes widen a bit as if he's surprised by the sound of his own voice.

"Am I doing okay?" Levi's eyes dart away.

"…Keep going," is his only response. So Eren does. All the hesitation and doubt fade and he drives into Levi hard. Eren hears Levi suck in a sharp breath and his arms tighten around his neck and his fingers pull on his hair.

"…Eren." He's so quiet. Eren wants to know what Levi really sounds like. His pace quickens and he uses the wall as a leverage point to reach deeper inside. He feels Levi twitch and tighten and then Levi slams his hand over his mouth to hold back his voice. Eren abruptly stops.

"Hey! Don't do that." He tears Levi's hand away. "I want to hear you." Levi turns a cheek.

"No, it's pathetic." Eren's brows pull together and he frowns.

"No it isn't. If you like it, you shouldn't be afraid of it." Levi's eyes taper.

"I'm not afraid of anything." Eren leans down and kisses him before murmuring against his mouth.

"Then don't hold back." And he drives forward and finally Levi lets down his guard. All his sides are bared and Eren takes it all in. This is the vulnerable part of Levi—the side that he doesn't allow anyone to see, that is, except for Eren. Eren's chest swells with pride. And he's kissing Levi's forehead.

"Thank you, Captain." But Levi can't respond or didn't hear him through the rush inside his head. He's too far-gone.

* * *

Levi plants a boot on Eren's shoulder and nudges his chin with the toe of it. Eren looks up and Levi leans down, his mouth at Eren's ear.

"Maybe I should kick you around again to prove to these pigs that I still have you on a tight leash."

"Ha…ha… you're joking, right?" Levi's eyes are a blank.

"It could be payback for my arm."

"…You're joking…_right_?" Eren squeaks. Levi doesn't reply. He straightens up and looks into Eren's eye with a cold deadpan. He speaks louder so the court can hear every word.

"These pigs are afraid of you," and his voice has no mercy, "But I'm not. I don't fear anything, especially little shits like you guys." And he eyes Reiner, Bertholdt, and Annie too. They're all bound and kneeling before the court. The atmosphere is tense and brittle as if it will shatter at the slightest movement. Reiner and Bertholdt seem a little nervous but Annie has her typical mask of boredom plastered on her face.

"But if there is one thing that I could fear, you know what it'd be?" His eyes sweep over the courtroom for a person bold enough to answer. When silence is the only response he lazily treads to the side and clutches onto the railing. He addresses the diplomats and military police on the other side in his usual stoic manner.

"Do you know about the beast titan?" Some random diplomat pipes in.

"That's just an urban legend." Levi whirls and he looks at this diplomat with an unwavering stony gaze.

"Are you sure?"

"One of our highly esteemed commanders was killed by the beast titan," comes Irvin's strong voice from the front of the room. "It's more than just legend." And there is a collective gasp and shaky, uneasy murmurs.

"We saw the beast titan by Wall Rose," Connie blurts and Jean nudges him in the side. Connie shoots a glare at him. They're there along with the rest of the 104th recruits watching from the front row. There's a shout from a faceless MP in the crowd.

"He's lying! He just doesn't want to see his friends be killed! He must be a traitor too!" he accuses. Connie goes pale and his mouth clamps shut. Levi turns to the MP that spoke and he shrinks back a little when Levi is close enough to touch him. But Levi passes him by without a glance his way and sets a foot on the bench behind him. He climbs to a stand on top of it and looks over the heads around him.

"The beast titan _is_ real," he states. "It towers high and it's powerful and it's intelligent." He makes eye contact with a military police commander before adding, "And it can speak."

"Are you makin' up shit now?" Levi's eyes flick to the person who spoke without turning to entirely face him.

"Are you calling me a liar?" When the man can't seem to find his tongue, Levi looks out over the fearful faces under him.

"It can speak, just like you…" and his scary eyes momentarily lock on a man beneath him and the man cowers under his stare. Then Levi's eyes are back over the crowd. "…and just like me." There's a spark behind Levi's eyes as if he's actually enjoying himself. He likes scaring these people. Then Levi leaps down from the bench and gracefully hurtles back over the rail.

"What's more is that it can influence other titans."

"Influence them? What the hell does that mean?"

"It means that it can get them to do its dirty work," is his casual reply that freezes everyone to the core. Levi comes to a halt at Eren's side in front of the judge's bureau.

"So if there's one thing that I could fear, it'd be the beast titan." Then he crosses his arms and gives a nonchalant shrug. "But I'm not afraid, so it's not my problem." General Zacklay adjusts his glasses and folds his hands in front of him before speaking.

"What do you propose we do then?" Irvin takes over.

"There is only one person who can match the beast titan's power and that's Eren Jaeger. He is the strongest titan shifter alive. He's humanity's last hope." Eren stiffens under the penetrating gazes of the people around him. He sees fear, doubt, and hate but he also sees hope. There are people here placing their faith on Eren's shoulders. They depend on him and he _won't_ let them down.

"Since we don't know where the beast titan is, we'll have to lure it out. We should close in on Wall Maria and, with the help of the other titan shifters, demolish the titans that have it overrun. With the commotion, the beast titan is sure to reveal itself then Eren will take it down." There is a heavy silence before Zacklay regards Eren with piercing dark eyes.

"Are you ready to take on such a challenge?" Eren swallows. He looks over at his friends and they're all watching him with determined looks. Mikasa's dark eyes are intense and they root straight into Eren. Armin is there too and he nods his head as if to tell Eren that he's ready. Finally Eren turns to Levi. His arms are folded over his chest as he coolly watches from a few meters away. His sharp eyes are impenetrable; Eren has no idea what thoughts are going through his head. And he really wants to know what Levi thinks. But this is Eren's choice to make. Is he ready?

He looks up at the general with steadfast resolve, "Yes sir, I'm ready. I'll annihilate the beast titan." For a long time, Zacklay's hard look doesn't falter as if searching for any cracks in Eren's assertion. Eren stands firm. Then finally Zacklay gives a nod.

"Very well. Who will lead this operation?"

"I will." Every head in the room snaps in the direction of the voice but there is only one person who's completely horrorstricken by this claim.

"I'll lead the men into battle," Irvin strongly declares.

* * *

The door bursts open then slams shut. There're only two people who have the nerve to barge into Irvin's room without knocking. Irvin isn't surprised to see Levi marching up to him with a blackened glare. He stops right in front of him and his sharp eyes bore straight into Irvin.

"You can't lead anymore. Not in your state." Irvin's reply is calm and composed.

"I can and I will." Levi's teeth gnash together and his expression darkens.

"You'll die."

"So be it." Levi's fists clench so tightly that his nails dig into the flesh of his palms and the muscles up his forearms tighten until they tremble.

"You're not an idiot," he growls, "So why would you do something so stupid?" Irvin's jaw sets and he gazes down at Levi with a stern look.

"I make the difficult decisions that no one else is willing to make. The human race depends on me that way. I'm the only one who knows what it takes to win." Levi's eyes taper.

"I can make the same decisions," he snaps. At that, Irvin's stern look deepens.

"You're not heartless. You have a respect for life that I don't have. I'd sacrifice even your life in the blink of an eye." Levi already knows this.

"It's a good thing I'm valuable then." They are silent as their heated stare down continues. At last Levi looks away.

"You really don't have a respect for life, not even your own…" he mutters, eyes downcast.

"Someone else can lead, so don't do this." A gruff curled finger tucks under Levi's chin and Irvin pulls his eyes to his.

"Levi, tell me, would you submit to anyone besides me?" Levi's reply is quick.

"I would." Irvin isn't fooled as his steel eyes regard Levi unblinkingly.

"Would you really?" Levi's harsh stare doesn't waver.

"I would try my damnedest to." Then Irvin's face softens.

"It's true that I can be replaced so until then I'll do all that I can in the name of humanity, do you understand?" Levi's teeth clinch together and he's slow to relent.

"I got it." Levi can't stop Irvin from making these life choices but he'll be there next to him in this fight. He can't let Irvin die. He won't.

* * *

Levi sits behind Eren, his legs spread out on either side of Eren's hips. His fingertips brush over his rutted spinal column and Eren's skin tingles at the feather light touch. He shivers.

"Captain…once I annihilate all of the titans and humanity is restored, will you do something for me?" Levi turns still. Eren looks up into the mirror across the room and sees the curiosity that peaks behind Levi's dull eyes.

"Depends on what it is." Eren's eyes are downcast and his hair falls into his face, veiling much of his expression from view.

"I want to see the ocean with you," he says quietly. Levi opens his mouth to reply but before he can Eren adds, "And then I want you to kill me." Levi freezes. He's not sure that he heard Eren right.

"Why would you want that?" Eren's shoulders expand with a long breath and his fingers fiddle and tug anxiously at each other in his lap.

"As long as I'm still here, this world will never be free of titans, right? That means…I have to die."

"Eren…" Levi isn't sure what to say. He doesn't want Eren to think that way but this isn't his decision to make.

"Do you really think the world will want you gone? What about your friends? What about your girlfriend?" Eren's brows pull together.

"Girlfriend?" Levi blinks at him. "You mean Mikasa? She's like a sister to me." Then Levi scoffs.

"You have a warped definition of family." Eren ignores him as he continues with what he was saying before.

"Once humanity regains its honor, I won't feel right living here anymore." Levi has heard enough. His arms slowly wrap around Eren from behind and his head rests against Eren's back.

"You're an idiot…" he mutters. "I'll see the ocean with you but you don't get to choose how you die." Eren sighs and doesn't reply. Who knows what the future holds anyway. Maybe they'll figure out a way to take away Eren's titan power so that he won't have to suffer anymore.

"Eren, I'll tell you something that I've never told anyone before." Eren perks up.

"Really? What is it?" and he sounds like an overzealous kid. The doom and gloom atmosphere abruptly shifts and Levi feels a little jumbled up on the inside. Following Eren's fickle mood is an impossible feat. Eren twists around and his intense green eyes are blazing with curiosity.

"There is something that I fear. It's a lie that I'm not afraid of anything." The curiosity in Eren's eyes burns a little brighter.

"What are you afraid of?" Levi is slow to reply.

"I'd tell you but then I'd have to kill you." The corners of Eren's mouth pull down into a scowl.

"That's not fair." Levi shrugs.

"Life's not fair. Get used to it." Eren growls and tackles Levi against the soft mattress and pillows. His mouth lands on Levi's lips. Then he breaks off for a second.

"Will you ever tell me what you fear?" Levi reaches up and sweeps the hair from out of Eren's eyes.

"Maybe one day. So if you want to find out, you better stay alive." Eren grins and Levi's heart quirks a little at that look.

"Yes sir."

* * *

Reclaiming Wall Maria will be difficult but with Reiner, Bertholdt, Annie, and Ymir they have a fighting chance. Eren observes his friends as they move into formation. They will be spread out—each titan shifter will be at the center of a squad of Scouts so that the power will be evenly disbursed. Eren will be at the center along with Levi, Mikasa, Commander Irvin, and a team of Scouts. As they move, they will protect Eren. Now that they've realized Eren transforms at the cost of his sanity, they want to preserve his power as a last resort. His friends start to split and scatter but Eren stops them.

"I want to say something to you guys." They all wait and listen. Eren looks at each of their faces. These are the people he will protect. These are the lives he'll keep close to his heart. He remembers the lives lost; his mother, Marco, Squad Levi, and Hannes... He'll fight for them.

"My deepest fear is myself. I'm afraid of what I can do. And I let that fear control me and I was driven into insanity. I don't know what each of you fear but don't let it stop you. Don't let it consume you. We'll prevail as long as we fight our fears. We won't live as cattle any longer." They nod with brave faces and then they're off. Eren turns and Levi is at his side.

"Let's go." And Eren feels unafraid as long as Levi stays at his side. He can brave anything with Levi here with him. He'll fight and he'll face his fears and he'll save humanity— he's their hope and their strength. He _won_'t fail.


End file.
